Description: As Vice cools off in Antarctic wastelands, her most pressing thought in the middle of May was the true meaning of Christmas. Fortunately, Daniel was just spinning by in his Magic Christmas Helicopter, and makes a special stop to Vice to teach her the true meaning of Christmas. Amount of Mescaline consumed by either character: Unknown at this time.
The bane of life. The Frozen South. What lays in Antartica, hidden from the eyes of the world? Well, many things. The very secluded nature of the place makes the South Pole one of the last places in the world where there is no chance of prying eyes spotting ones activities. Is it any surprise that 'R' uses the place to store some of their more deadly and advanced weapons?
Vice hadn't particularly liked that she'd been asked to go and check in during her /vacation/, but it does at least mean that she's going to lose the tail of any police or heroes who may want revenge following her massacre in Greece. What sort of fool would be insane enough to follow her into the very depths of this frozen hell? Why, the very land itself is anathema to all that needs to breathe.
In concession to the chill, Vice has wrapped up in a long red coat. She does not, otherwise, seem too bothered by the surroundings. She has decided that she is going to walk, however. And the icy terrain crunches under her heels. Just the blizzard and the snow for company... it is actually, relaxing. With nothing around to kill, her bloodlust is actually subsiding to manageable levels for once. Wonderful.
*Crunch Crunch Crunch*
The sound that cuts through the blizzard may interrupt Vice's serene repose. The crunching is very familiar, for someone like Vice. Footsteps. Snowshoes, mostly likely. Forcing through the snow was the vague outline of a figure, deep in the snowstorm.
*Crunch Crunch Crunch*
For such a remote location, this was no coincidence: Someone was coming straight for the secret cache of weapons. The vague, humanoid form steadily approaches, each step coming to a crunch in the thick snow. But why? Why now? Why at this time? As the figure approaches the woman, perhaps something more sinister for the tainted woman was coming.
Perhaps Ikari has decided to pay Vice a visit.
Someone... else?
Vice's anger surges back up inside her far quicker than normal. Simply because someone is intruding on a situation she had been enjoying. Solitude is rare in this world, even for someone who is actively violent against pretty much everyone. For a moment, Vice remains perfectly still, judging where the figure is from the sound of the crunching.
Then she comes forwards. Her hand snaps out, guided by instinct for the newcomer's throat. If she gets that grip, she'll drag him up to eye level, squeezing hard and snarling with raw, animal rage in her voice.
"How do you want to die?"
If this turns out to be one of 'R's people, she might have to let go. But it isn't likely to change the outcome. She hadn't been expecting anyone, and Vice hates surprises even when they don't ruin her focus.
COMBATSYS: Vice has started a fight here.
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Vice 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Daniel has joined the fight here.
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Vice 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Daniel
COMBATSYS: Daniel blocks Vice's Quick Throw.
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Vice 0/-------/-------|=------\-------\0 Daniel
*Crunch Crunch Crunch.
As the figure comes in closes, the details breaks through. It seemed to be dressed in bright red; highlighted with white fur at the collar and cuffs. In great black boots, lined with fur, the figured seemed to be well dressed for the cold. He does not even seem aware of the incoming danger, as he holds a giant red sack, likely loaded with explosives, over his shoulder. Upon his head, a red, fur-lined cap. Steadily, he moves forward, unaware of the woman heading his way.
*Crunch Crunch CRACK*
A wrist is all that keeps the neck intact. Up close, the details of the man is far clearer. A great, white beard hangs over his face. With a paunch, which may actually be a pillow, poking out from his red jacket, the man looks very familiar... save for his dark skin, and intense gaze. Looking into the eyes of his would-be killer, may very well be the least expected santa of all time.
Daniel Jack, student of Todoh.
"HO HO HO!" The words that erupt are terse. They were not jolly, but the words of a man bound by fate to be jolly. But the detective's eyes were hot. "HELLO THERE LITTLE GIRL! HO HO HO! COULD YOU NOT CRUSH SANTA'S WINDPIPE!? HO HO HO!" With a sharp, steady swing, the detective swings the sack overhead, attempting to smack Vice upside the head, breaking him free from the choking grapple.
"HO HO HO!"
COMBATSYS: Vice dodges Daniel's Large Random Weapon.
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Vice 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Daniel
...
Vice does let go, mostly due to surprise. The heavy sack swings through the air where she had been, and her brow furrows. There's... so many things wrong with this. For a start, it is May. It is also the South Pole, not the North Pole. She's fairly certain that he shouldn't be here, even if he is Santa. Oh. And of course, there's the small fact that Santa doesn't exist.
Vice may not be the brains of her operation, but even she is fairly sure that this is someone's idea of a joke. Her eye twitches, and her lip curls up unpleasantly. "Who the hell do you think you're talking to?" She demands, "You think this is FUNNY?" Well... it might be. But Vice has never been very good about taking a joke.
And so, earning an eternal place on the Naughty List, Vice comes in again, aiming to close the ground and pitch her fist right into Santa's belly (which may shake like a bowl full of jelly). All of her force put into it, the Orochi-blooded secretary falls back on her usual reaction to anything she doesn't understand: smash it.
COMBATSYS: Daniel blocks Vice's Aggressive Strike.
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Vice 0/-------/-------|=------\-------\0 Daniel
"HO HO HO"
Technically, that was a laugh. But the detective's eyes were dead serious. If this was a joke, Daniel Jack was completely oblivious to it. "WELL LITTLE GIRL! USING MY MAGIC SANTA SENSES, I CAN SEE FAR ACROSS THE WORLD, TO EVERY LITTLE BOY AND EVERY LITTLE GIRL! AND I LEARNED HERE IN THE FAR CORNER OF THE NORTH POLE, RIGHT UNDER MY NOSE, WAS A GROWN UP LITTLE GIRL WHO DID NOT UNDERSTAND THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS!" Daniel Jack says every word with the utter seriousness as he would explain to a mother that her daughter diagnosis was terminal. And despite the obvious truth before Vice, the naughty secretary was set on staying on that list. And so, the punch is unleashed right for his torso, and Daniel Jack, clutching the sack still, can only turn his body away. The blow drives hard into his paunch...
Exploding in a puff of feathers.
Daniel Jack is free of the pillow, a glancing blow, if there ever was one. However, immediately, under the cover of the blizzard, he frisks out of a pillow from the sack. Drawing it out, he stuffs it into his jacket again. Paunch is live again. Looking serious, the Santa turns back to Vice, dropping the big red sack in the snow. "HO HO HO! COME!" The detective begins, attempting to grab Vice. What ensues may be akin to putting a wet cat into a small bag. But it is very clear, as Daniel tries to seize Vice, and sit down on the sack, what the detective intended with Vice.
"SIT ON SANTA'S LAP, AND LET HIM EXPLAIN THE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS!"
COMBATSYS: Daniel successfully hits Vice with Medium Throw.
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Vice 0/-------/------=|=------\-------\0 Daniel
Vice is, perhaps, surprised that this guy is apparently intent on keeping up the Santa routine. She is grabbed, and 'Santa' drives Vice down onto his lap. Okay. That was... not how things were meant to go. For someone used to inspiring fear and terror in everyone around them, this outcome is... disturbing. Daniel is refusing to take her seriously, and that is angering.
Her hand whips forward. Aiming to snare 'Santa' by the hat, gripping tight into Daniel's hair, and ripping him out from underneath her, swinging the holy jolly man up and around and around and AROUND! If she manages this, Daniel will be treated to quite the wild ride, as Vice's arm seems literally to stretch around.
"You want me to sit on your lap, fatso?!" She roars, "I don't think you understand what a BAD GIRL I REALLY AM!"
And, to demonstrate that, she aims to PITCH Daniel straight up into the air. There's not many people who can get the sort of range that Vice can on a thrown human body... and in her experience, terminal velocity tends to do wonderful things to make a man reevaluate his priorities and start considering that she might not be playing around.
... not that she *often* needs to make that kind of impression ...
COMBATSYS: Daniel endures Vice's Deicide!
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Vice 0/-------/----===|=======\-------\1 Daniel
"HO HO HO!"
"HO HO HO! THERE WE GO! NOW! A LITTLE BIRDIE TOLD ME THAT YOU FORGOT THE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS! WHY! HE EVEN TOLD ME THAT YOU STOP BELIEVING CHRISTMAS! HE ALSO TOLD ME AFTER THE THIRD LONG ISLAND THAT THIS WAS A WEAPON CACHE! NOW, SANTA IS INTERESTED IN MANY THINGS. ALL THE GOOD LITTLE GIRLS AND BOYS IN THE WORLD. SPREADING CHRISTMAS CHEER! WATCH THIEVES!" Santa Danny puts a hand on Vice's thigh. "THAT IS WHY SANTA HAS COME HERE IN HIS MAGIC HELICOPTER TO TEACH YOU THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS, LITTLE GIRL! LET ME TELL YOU, LITTLE GIRL..."
"THE CHRISTMAS STORY!"
"CHRISTMAS BEGAN WITH THE VIRGIN MARY! THE VIRGIN MARY AND GEESE HOWARD WERE IN BETHELHAM, WHICH WAS A TOWER IN ISRAEL! THEN VIRGIN MARY FELT A BABY KICKING! THAT BABY WAS JESUS! WHEN BABY JESUS WAS BORN IT MADE FIREWORKS!"
The story, unfortunately, becomes interrupted as Santa is HURLED right up into the air. Daniel Jack, sailing in the air, spins around several times. After the initial toss wears off, however, it becomes VERY clear that... Santa isn't stopping the store. He is not stopping the story.
"THEN JESUS'S DADDY FELL OFF A TOWER!"
"JESUS WAS SAD. BUT THEN THREE WISE MEN ARRIVED! JOE! ANDY! AND THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE, TERRY! AND THEY GAVE BABY JESUS THREE GIFTS! A BUSTAH WOLF! A POWAH WAVE! AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, A BUUUUURN NUKWA! JESUS THOUGHT THIS WAS-"
*WHUMP*
Daniel lands face first in the snow beside Vice.
There is a moment of stunned silence, as he status of whether or not Daniel will live or die from his encounter with the psycho-wolf.
And then he continues with the story.
"-AND THAT IS WHY CHRISTMAS WAS MADE, AND WHY ROCK HOWARD IS SANTA'S BEST HELPER! NOW, IN THE SPIRIT OF JESUS'S OTHER DADDY, BECAUSE JESUS HAS LOTS OF DADDIES, SANTA WILL GIVE -YOU-, LITTLE GIRL, THE GIFT THAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS DESERVED!" Bursting right up, Santa stares at Vice with those wild, cold eyes. Winding back a foot, he positions behind Vice, Santa Danny throws forward his foot, to give what Vice had always deserved for Christmas.
A kick in the pants.
COMBATSYS: Vice blocks Daniel's Strong Kick.
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Vice 0/-------/----===|=======\-------\1 Daniel
Vice has never been very /good/ at fighting banter. It just pisses her off, really. And whilst she threatens and mocks and rages quite often, she's just... not witty. She is a barely controlled animal. And whilst Daniel is spilling his guts, explaining what the hell is going on (in his own, strange, way), Vice just wants to shut him up.
It does mean that she is tracking his trajectory pretty well, though. She rounds on him with all the instinct of a wild beast. Her hand smashes into his foot, and turns the blow aside. Daniel's eyes are crazy in an entirely different way to Vice's. He's wild, free, eccentric, crazy... but not in a dangerous way.
Vice however, is wild like a beast. Psychotic. Craze/d/, not just crazy. There's actual flecks of spit at the corner of her mouth, though they freeze over almost instantly. She can sometimes appear to be more than this; she's cunning, and properly motivated she can be incredibly vindictive, unnerving, terrifying.
But Daniel's relentless good cheer has brought out all the worst in her. Not to mention that he's interrupted the first time in WEEKS that she had started to feel in control.
"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!." She howls, raising both hands above her head, clenching both into fists.
And they both come down, with bone-shattering force, aiming to crash straight into Daniel's skull. The attack is devastating; dizzying... used to stun, before she goes into the kill.
COMBATSYS: Daniel dodges Vice's Monstrosity.
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Vice 0/-------/-----==|=======\-------\1 Daniel
"HO HO HO"
Daniel's cheer isn't even a natural cheer. The detective was as if. There was no reason for him to be here. No justification. No rhyme. No reason. It was as if Vice had actually died, and this was her hell. Endless Black Todoh Santa. Eccentric? Crazed? Or just flat intense? As Vice punches his foot, the detective just stares at the woman as she bring both hands towards for a skeleton-shattering smash. To which, Daniel Claus has a very repetitive response.
"HO HO HO!"
And somehow, he dodges. Perhaps it was the spirit of Christmas in him. Perhaps it was natural talent from the detective. Or maybe, perhaps, it was a sudden gust of wind, making the blizzard grow more wild. Santa just shrugs. the blow hitting the ground right before him. "THAT WAS THE GIFT FROM SANTA. BOY SANTA IS A JERK! THAT IS IT THEN! LOOKS LIKE NOTHING ELSE FOR THIS LITTLE-"
"OH WHAT'S THIS?"
Daniel Jack pretends to look surprised when he opens his sack. "WHAT IS THIS? HO HO OH? THIS LOOKS LIKE A SURPRISE PRESENT FOR A YOUNG LADY." The detective looks around dully, before turning RIGHT for Vice. "HO HO HO! WHY! IT LOOKS LIKE THIS IS A PRESENT FROM SANTA TODOH, THE SUPERIOR SANTA OF CHRISTMAS!"
And Daniel Jack holds out a wrapped present to Vice.
Waiting.
Was she going to take a FREE present?
COMBATSYS: Daniel takes no action.
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Vice 0/-------/-----==|=======\-------\1 Daniel
It really is like hell.
Vice has a lot of experience with hell, though.
There are a lot of scary things about Vice. One of them is that the longer she is denied, the more her rage is stoked. She's an inexhaustible supply of violence and fury. Her fists plunge through the air where Daniel had been, and shatter the ground. Smashing through the ice, when she rips them back up, she's breathing hard. Not because she's tired, but because her desire to kill is just... pouring out of her. Thick clouds of vapor swirling around her.
"You think you're FUNNY, don't you, FUNNY MAN?!" She bellows. Hunched and flexing her fingers, she squares up to Daniel, stepping so close that they are almost touching. Her breath is hot, hotter than it has any right to be. And she does grab the present.
"If you want to meet the Son of God so much, I'll send you to meet him! I'll rip you limb from limb, and we'll see whether you can ho-ho-ho without a THROAT, so START MAKING SENSE, AND GIVE ME A REASON NOT TO KILL YOU, WHOEVER YOU ARE!"
And... because Vice really is an awful human being, she will throw the package onto the ground, and, rather than opening it or... treating it with any kind of respect, she'll stomp down heavily onto it. Pretty bow or not.
COMBATSYS: Vice gathers her will.
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Vice 0/-------/-======|=======\-------\1 Daniel
"HO HO HO!"
There is no shift from his gaze as Vice takes the gift. As she throws it down, there is a rattle, a hint of its goods. Santa Danny does not change his experience as Vice raises a heeled foot up, and smashes it down hard. The package caves in, utterly crushed.
The sound of glass shattering rises up to their ears.
Under Vice's heel was a swiftly melting pool of snow, as liquor leaks from the present. A broken Crown bottle, filled with Canadian Whiskey, lays shattered beneath her feet. Free liquor, as a gift. Destroyed asunder. And to it, Santa laughs. Oh, how doe he laugh. But there was no laughter in Daniel's eyes. Only a forlorn gaze of loss.
"HO HO HO!"
"WELL! I CAN TELL THIS CHRISTMAS AT THE NORTH POLE IS OVER! SO NOW I MUST RETURN TO MY MAGIC HELICOPTER!" Daniel Jack collects up the sack up again, before turning around. Hefting the great sack over his shoulder, he raises a palm towards the others. "PEACE BE ON EARTH! AND HAVE GOOD WILL TO ALL MAN! WE'VE ESTABLISH THAT WE ALL, WE WILL TRY TO MAKE IT WON'T WE?"
And Daniel Jack turns around, fading back towards the blizzard.
COMBATSYS: Daniel takes no action.
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Vice 0/-------/-======|=======\-------\1 Daniel
Okay enough is enough.
Vice feels something wet under her foot, and for a moment, she has to wonder if she actually cut herself. Of course, she didn't. But the whiskey soaks under her foot. It is ... irritating, but then everything that has happened has been angering. Her brow furrows, and she looks back up as Daniel starts to retreat.
"I am going to FEED you that ridiculous beard!"
She lunges into the dark and the snow, and her fist slices through... nothing at all. "What..."
She swings around, and goes for the next. "I'm gonna rip you to..." She punches right through the shadow that she thought was Daniel, and her fist ploughs into the glass, cutting deep into her own knuckles. Her foot had been protected, her fist? Not so much. There's an enraged scream.
"DAMN YOU SANTA CLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUS!"
Log created on 05:43:18 05/18/2012 by Daniel, and last modified on 17:05:49 05/18/2012.