Description: Built in May 2008, the National Museum of Crime & Punishment features a wide-variety of displays, ranging from pirates and Wild West outlaws to exhibits on serial killers. This place also has twenty-eight sweet-ass simulators that range from police chasing to firearms training and even an authentic lethal injection machine from Philadelphia. Fortunately, Cody Travers doesn't have to worry about any of this! He's been given free reign of the facility with his partner (in CRIME?!) Jayden Remarque, with one catch: they face off against the World's Strongest Woman, Chun-Li! They can go anywhere and to any exhibit they want as long as they fulfill one obligation: beat the hell out of Chun-Li. (Winner: Chun-Li)
THE NATIONAL MUSEUM OF CRIME & PUNISHMENT
WASHINGTON, D.C.
It costs a lot of money to rent an entire national museum for a day, which probably means the cancellation of the last match scheduled here for 'technical reasons'-
THEN
Cody Travers, muscles bulging and veins pulsing green, rampages through the Museum. In each of his hands, a huge video camera is clutched like a club, and he is using them to great and terrible effect to smash through everything in his path, including museum exhibits and SNF filming crew.
NOW
- made the bigwigs who run SNF pretty angry.
This time, however, they've learned their lesson; in lieu of an actual crew, cameras have been set up in elevated positions all throughout the museum, poised to catch the oncoming brawl wherever it may occur.
Cody, clad in his full-body, blue-and-white striped jumpsuit, sits quietly on a half-wall of crates that serves as the counter for an old west-themed shooting gallery in the section of the museum dedicated to the notorious history of American crime. Without thinking, he reaches his right hand up to scratch an itch on his left shoulder...
... and almost yanks Jayden to the ground as the handcuffs connecting the two reach their truly generous full length of 'like, a foot'. Cody's hand doesn't quite make it to his shoulder, and the blonde turns a baleful glare onto his teammate, as if the entire affair was his fault.
Jay isn't -that- easy to yank off his feet, not that Cody isn't trying. But he doesn't look any happier at the affair, putting tension into the chain to hold his ground. "You de one all gussied up for a date wit' de sheriff, boyo. Why do *I* gotta be here, strung up like a chicken wit' you?" The thickening Cajun accent is probably the only real hint of how much Jayden is disliking the whole thing.
Papa tol' me I'd end up in de cuffs one day... I don' think he mean' like this."
The man makes a mental note to grab part of that chain before the fight begins, lest Cody just try and manhandle him around. He's seen the type--he's been in prison. This blonde sumbitch is gonna be a pain to deal with.
At least he gets to meet Chun-Li and her famous legs--'course he's heard about them. He's looking forward to sexually harassing her--verbally--at least a little. Well, he doesn't see it as harassment. It's just a few comments, right? That thought keeps him a little placid, but he is also thinking, on a serious level, how this fight is going to work... or not-work, most likely.
SOME TIME AGO
"Handcuffed together? Isn't that a little... cruel?" Chun-Li asks her agent, who is deeply tanned and, when clad in his $3,000 suit, doesn't hold elevators for the guy who doesn't make that in six months, c'mon.
"More like a little RATINGS DYNAMITE," Chun-Li's agent replies, in between shoveling P.F. Chang's into his mouth. (Chun-Li has barely touched her General Tso's.) "Trust me, Chun, this thing is exactly what people want to see you do -- kick the crap out of lawbreakers instead of giving them a second chance."
Chun-Li frowns delicately, pushing some food around with her chopsticks, her fork studiously ignored. "Cody Travers may be a lawbreaker, but... he's got a lot of problems. I mean, really, he should be in rehab, not fighting... and I don't even know this other person. Jayden?"
"You know what his name is?" Chun-Li's agent replies. "His name is KICKED IN THE FUCKING FACE. BOOM, BABY."
Chun-Li stares blankly at her agent for a good two minutes.
NOW
Qipao, check. Brocades over her oxhorns, check. Spiked training bracelets, check. Now, all that remains for Xiang Chun-Li is the most crucial element of her fighting preparation: applying chapstick. Seriously, no one wants to start feeling their lips get all dried out and cracked and stuff in the middle of a fight. Especially a two-on-one fight. Especially a two-on-one fight on TV.
Walking through the seemingly empty halls of the Museum of Crime and Punishment, Chun-Li glances from side to side. On the one hand, the monument to the forces of justice that this place represents fills her with a certain pride; on the other, she finds it strange that no cameramen are around, and she has not yet twigged that the wall-mounted cameras aren't just the museum's typical security. "Hello?" she calls, cupping one hand to her mouth as she rounds a corner--
--to find Cody and Jayden, miscreants both. "Oh!" the World's Strongest Woman says, her face nearly turning a shade pinker. "Excuse me! If you need another few minutes to get ready, I don't mind... but if you're ready now," the woman says, relaxing her body into a graceful, low-angled tai chi stance: "...so am I."
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li has started a fight here.
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Chun-Li 0/-------/-------|
Cody has barely spoken a word during the wait for Chun-Li, but apparently even that brief stint of talkiness from Jayden was enough to push his buttons. "Man, shut the fuck up, Gambit," he growls, shifting in his seat in agitation. Before he has time to work up another cutting barb, however, Chun-Li wanders into view.
"Thank Christ," Cody exclaims tiredly, rising from his seat. "It's about time." That's all the warning the World's Strongest Woman gets before the blonde tenses up and springs forwards, charging towards her.
He makes it about a step before he jerks to a halt as the handcuffs connecting Jayden and himself snap taut again with a brief metallic shriek. Exasperated, Cody turns to face his partner, spreading his non-handcuffed arm as if to say, 'Come on, really?', or perhaps 'I will bury you alive'.
After a second to make his displeasure clear, Cody whirls on Chun-Li again, snapping his arm just so. It happens almost too fast to see, but all of a sudden there's a black handle in the blonde's left hand, and then a long silver blade snaps out of it.
It's little more than a shiny blur, though, for in the same instant Cody's arm snaps forwards, and the knife lances towards Chun-Li like a dart, cutting through the air with a shrill whistle.
COMBATSYS: Cody has joined the fight here.
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Cody 0/-------/------=|-------\-------\0 Chun-Li
Cody's brief outburst only draws a smirk from the Cajun--man's too easy to needle... maybe needle isn't hte best word to use. Still, when Chun-Li shows up, looking as fine as the World's Strongest Woman does, he can't help but let out a low wolf-whistle. It's just because he is who he is, he can't help it. Of course Cody has to start things off--Jayden gives a cool look when Cody gets pulled up short, but after the man makes his throw, Jayden moves up. "You wan' t' win? Den we best work together, cher, or we be nothin' but punching bags. Your choice--we show dis one how t' dance or we end up bruised sacks."
Of course, with his arm shackled, Jay can't really operate all that effectively either--staying on his toes in case Cody moves, he reaches across his body with his right hand, sweeping it outwards and launching an arc of yellow-gren sonic chi at Chun. For a fighter of her stature, it might not do much--but it'll leave a lasting effect, if it hits...
"Since you seem so eager t' meet 'er, I'll follow your lead, M'seur Travers. Trust you don' wan' to be on the wrong end o' those legs any more than I do."
COMBATSYS: Jayden has joined the fight here.
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Cody 0/-------/------=|-------\-------\0 Chun-Li
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Jayden 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Cody's Knife Throw.
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Cody 0/-------/------=|-------\-------\0 Chun-Li
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Jayden 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Jayden successfully hits Chun-Li with Sonic Slash.
- Power hit! -
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Cody 0/-------/------=|-------\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
Chun-Li's agility is something to behold -- the knife whizzes toward her, at three times the speed of ordinary knife violence, and at the last possible instant she sweeps her body out of the way. The motion is measured and flowing, and avoids a pancreatic stabbing with the greatest of ease. Not so with the sonic chi that comes hurtling toward her next, though. Chun-Li doesn't know Jayden from Adam, and isn't sure what to expect, especially in such confining circumstances -- which comes back to bite her when she dodges just a bit too slowly, and thus ends up not dodging at all.
The yellow-green blast strikes Chun-Li in the shoulder, its sonic energy sending powerful vibrations through her frame -- her muscles tense and shudder, and she briefly loses her footing, stopping herself at the last second from falling over. Her bicep continues to twitch, causing her arm movements to become stilted and difficult -- luckily, Chun-Li's arms were never the star of the show.
"I expected better from you, Cody," the default mother hen of the fighting world chides as she moves toward the two, struggling to keep her bum arm moving in the process. "A knife? I'd expect that from someone in Mad Gear, but you're above that." The Most Dangerous Woman in the World brings her leg up -- giving Jayden a good view, seriously -- to feint a kick toward the blonde ex-con's head...
...and then changes it up mid-swing, suddenly snapping her heel down to try and connect with Cody's knee and turn her opponents' strategy more toward the three-legged race at a company picnic.
COMBATSYS: Cody Toughs Out Chun-Li's Medium Kick!
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Cody 0/-------/---====|=------\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
The feint turns out to be wholly unnecessary. When Chun-Li rushes in, Cody neither ducks nor weaves, nor does he even put up his arms to catch the blow. In fact, he never even goes on the defensive; as the World's Strongest Woman lifts her leg, Cody's reaching out for what passes for her collar with his left hand, either somehow missing the incoming kick or just completely ignoring it.
Chun-Li's foot connects hard enough to punch through most walls, and certainly hard enough to break something, or simply turn a lesser man's knee into hamburger. Cody's leg, however, suffers neither; in fact, it barely seems to give at all, and the only sign Cody gives that he was struck at all is a sharp exhalation.
A heartbeat after Chun-Li's heel crashes into his knee, Cody's hand grips a handful of her shirt, and he rocks briefly onto his heels and then gives her a very special kiss.
Using his forehead.
There's little good cheer in Jayden's expression, especially for a man who just scored a palpable hit on a woman of no small renown in the fighting world. But then, that's what he's like in battle--cool, calm, serious. He'll crack wise, but only when it suits him... and now Chun-Li's chosen to close range. That makes things a little easier for the handcuffed men--at least there's less jockeying about for range and position.
"Seems almos' personal, maybe I ought not get involved." muses Jayden. Of course he's only kidding--as Cody attempts the headbutt, the ex-Special Forces man does something very simple. Simple, and yet, considered incredibly nasty by most modern fighting standards--well, sportfighting standards, anyways.
Quite simply put, he looks to sink a stiffened-finger blow right into Chun's back, like he was trying to stab her kidney out with a particularly dull spitfork. It's sure to hurt, if nothing else, and while permament damage is tough to manage on a fighter, impermanent is easy enough to make happen.
All he has to do is hit her, right? How hard can -that- be?
COMBATSYS: Cody successfully hits Chun-Li with Medium Strike.
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Cody 0/-------/--=====|==-----\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Jayden's Fierce Punch.
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Cody 0/-------/--=====|==-----\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
Chun-Li had expected more give to Cody's precious joint. This throws her off by a split-second, as the smoothness of her motion is interrupted by the refusal of Cody's knee in giving way.
As it turns out, it takes all of a split-second to break the human nose!
Cody's headbutt strikes true, and he crashes into Chun-Li's face with the kind of kiss that gets husbands arrested. Blood rockets out of her nostrils, with a helpfully gross soundtrack provided by the crunch of mutilated cartilage. This isn't Chun-Li's first broken nose -- but damn if it doesn't hurt like hell every single time.
"GUHH!" the World's Strongest Woman cries as she staggers backward, casually swerving her hips out of the path of Jayden's hand. "Tt," she says, wiping blood away from her face -- and with the Cajun rogue behind her, she suddenly curves one of her legs back and shoots it upward, her body dipping low as she tries to send one of her soles right under his jaw.
When Cody's head snaps back, his forehead is smeared with Chun-Li's blood, and when he doesn't immediately reach up to wipe it away, it begins to trickle down into his eyes.
In some ways, nobody wins with a headbutt.
When the World's Strongest Woman turns her wrath upon his partner, dipping low and curving her leg upwards, Cody tenses up again and he springs a few feet into the air, curling his legs up underneath him. The motion yanks Jayden's arm outwards as Cody teases the limits of his freedom of movement, a fact which causes the blonde to almost - /almost/ - hope that he didn't just throw his partner off balance.
Either way, Cody's short hop carries him into the air over Chun-Li, and his feet strike outwards for the woman's shoulders. It's not a kick, however; Cody plants his feet on Chun-Li's back as best he can and then simply stands up, trying to use his entire body weight to force her off balance and drive her into the ground face first.
COMBATSYS: Jayden Toughs Out Chun-Li's Aggressive Strike!
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Cody 0/-------/---====|====---\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
"Oh, shi--" That's pretty much as far as the Cajun gets before that white bootheel is touching his chin. Instinctively, he reacts, throwing his head back just a fraction of a degree more--but it's enough. Just enough to save him from having his head separated from his shoulders. The impact is still plenty amazing; immediately, a heavy bruise forms on Jayden's chin, pain blossoming somewhere between his eyes and shooting down into his neck.
But the important thing is--he doesn't fall. In fact, he doesn't even stagger, through a nearly inhuman effort to stand his ground. And while he's hobbled by having a drug-addict asshole chained to his left arm, he can still use his right, and to that end he seeks to just--grab Chun around the waist and haul her up and over in a one-armed bodyslam/suplex kind of technique.
He isn't shouting some sort of kiai--in fact, what he shouts is bleeped from SNF's feed, and it's loud and unrepentantly shouted.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li blocks Cody's Bad Stamp.
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Cody 0/-------/--=====|=====--\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li interrupts German Suplex from Jayden with Spinning Bird Kick.
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Cody 0/-------/--=====|=======\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 1/=======/=======|
Chun-Li's body is dropped low, perfect for Cody to try and tap-dance on her shoulderblades. A funny thing happens on the way to the ground, though -- the World's Strongest Woman proves herself just that by slamming her palms down and, quite simply, stopping herself. Cody still lands on her spine and it still hurts like hell, but the Chinese fighting phenom bucks herself upward, casting the rowdy convict off of her with only minimal risk of a shattered disk in her vertebrae. "Ha-ah!" she exhales, blood still pouring from her nose and staining her teeth, causing her to spit every few seconds as she hoists herself up.
Just as she does that, though, Jayden comes up from behind and clasps his arm around her waist. There have been more audacious groping attempts made against Chun-Li in her lifetime -- she has, after all, fought Mike Bison -- but she doesn't have time to suffer it right now. Still, she's recovering from the busted nose, the still-tingly shoulder, and now the double-footed stomp to her back, so she can't quite wrestle free as Jayden bends back and takes her with him.
As her head smashes into the ground, though, Chun-Li does one better -- grunting through the pain (and losing one of her silk brocades in the process), she forces herself to turn the impact into a headstand, and begins to spin on her crown -- legs splaying into a deadly split as she uses Jayden's grip to force him into suffering a point-blank--
"SPINNING BIRD KICK!"
Chun-Li throws Cody from her back like a prize Swedish Rodeo competitor, but he only makes it about a foot before the handcuffs snap taut again and he slams to the ground in an awkward heap, arm jerking upwards as Jayden hoists Chun-Li over his body and slams her into the ground.
Even through the adrenaline of combat, and his rapidly growing distaste for his partner, Cody can't help but make a face a little bit like this - D: - when Chun-Li reverses the suplex into a Spinning Bird Kick. The blonde takes a split second to wonder if this is what it would look like to see a full grown man put in a giant blender.
But there's no time to waste contemplating the horrible fate of his partner. Cody pulls himself to his feet and takes advantage of how much spinning while upside down is certain to distract Chun-Li by lifting his right foot almost straight up into the air and then slamming it downwards heel-first... right towards her exposed groin.
Oh, jesus lord almighty. Jayden's life is suddenly a blur of blue, white, and red. Very patriotic. If also painful. Somehow he manages to remain standing--somehow. But it doesn't look pretty. His face is a mass of bruises--actually, all of him is--and he's... pretty damn pissed off. So pissed off, he doesn't really have words for it--he's not really thinking coherently. So, yeah, when Cody goes for the groin...
Well, Jayden starts aiming for Chun's kidneys. Both of them. And her liver. Basically he's just throwing savage right hooks at her lower body, attempting to break her spine or something silly, or just tenderize her backside some more. It's done out of love and respect, right? Just like when he tires of that and tries to grab her by the hair and yank her down. Respect and love.
He's -trying- to keep his cool, but damn, taking that hit was like a touch of heaven before the tour through hell--a sight he'll never forget combined with bruises that may never fade... from his soul.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li parries Cody's Heavy Kick!
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Cody 0/-------/--=====|=======\=------\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Jayden's Neutron Break.
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Cody 0/-------/--=====|=======\=------\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
Chun-Li may be a little busy, but she still has an innate sixth sense for when someone is about to violate her womanly sanctity. Case in point -- as her spinning kick slows and she slams her arms down to the ground to steady herself into a kip-up, Cody's foot comes down hard toward her hose-and-spandex'd loins. For a moment, it seems as though all is lost...
...when Chun-Li's thighs suddenly snap shut around Cody's foot like a steel trap. Actually, steel traps are probably more merciful than the most famous legs in the world, and the added fury that Cody's attempted vaginacide induces in Chun-Li causes her to clasp even tighter than she normally might.
As Jayden gets low to try and batter her torso and vital organs, Chun-Li evades the attempt by flipping herself upward, using her arm's strength to launch her body into the air, and her grace and agility to tumble so that she lands feet-down.
Mind you, she still has Cody's foot pinned between her thighs when she does this -- her goal is to take him for a bit of a ride, too.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li successfully hits Cody with Strong Throw EX.
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Cody 1/------=/=======|=======\==-----\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
Cody's eyebrows lift upwards in surprise as Chun-Li's thighs clamp shut around his foot, stopping its downwards momentum cold. That's all the expression he has time for, however, before he's suddenly yanked off of his feet (well, foot) and sent spinning through the air as the woman rights herself.
Cody's ride is so fantastical that as he hits the ground, limbs splaying out in all directions as his tumble is arrested by those /god damn handcuffs/, one of his legs crashes against the half-wall of faux wooden crates he was using as a seat, and one of the shooting gallery rifles slips out of its 'holster' and clatters to the floor.
The noise draws Cody's attention, and in the second or two he's on the floor dazed, he's struck with a truly brilliant idea. Twisting his body around so that his free arm can reach the fallen rifle, Cody rips the weapon free of the cable attaching it to the faux crates and then rises awkwardly to his feet, turning back towards Chun-Li.
As the blonde rises, he tightens his grip on his newfound weapon where he holds it by the barrel, and swings it in a vicious horizontal strike at Chun-Li's ribs like a club. Later, viewers will debate on internet message boards as to why he didn't just, you know, fucking shoot her.
That's simple. Guns /never/ work like that. It probably isn't even loaded. Jayden punches empty air, which is an unsatisfying feeling, to say the least. So what does Jayden do? He growls, under his breath. He growls and he watches, as Chun-Li gives Cody what most men have dreamed about. Likely it's not as pleasant as it looks... there's no envy in this soldier's heart. But that pirouette...
Jayden drops low, automatically yanking on the cuffs to keep Cody from flying away. And while he's down there... he plants his right hand and attempts to sweep Chun-Li's legs out from underneath her. It's a simple technique, to be sure, but if Cody can manage to distract her enough--well, it could be a beautiful thing.
Inadvertently, he's working 'with' Cody, but it's pretty close to being instinctual--teamwork has been drilled into his head by a great many people and besides, Cody's swinging the butt end of a goddamn rifle around, and Jay's gonna bet Cody won't give a shit if he clocks his partner one in the swinging.
COMBATSYS: Cody successfully hits Chun-Li with Random Weapon.
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Cody 1/-----==/=======|=======\====---\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Jayden's Strong Kick.
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Cody 1/-----==/=======|=======\====---\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/--=====|
The sweep kick from Jayden is readily avoided by Chun-Li -- the World's Strongest Woman hops in the air, and that's that. Or is it? Because before she can touch down, Cody Travers swings a god damn rifle at her, and though he failed to destroy her precious baby machine, he has now succeeded in smacking her right in the tits. "EEAH--!" the Chinese warrior cries as she's knocked onto her back, shoulders smacking roughly into the cold floor. She clutches her chest, sucking in a deep breath that sounds more like a hiss.
The agony only keeps hold of her for a second or two, though. With uncanny resilience -- or at least tolerance for pain -- Xiang Chun-Li kicks herself back up onto her feet, using her shoulders to launch herself up so that when she swings her legs, she rights herself properly. Her tai chi stance is reaffirmed, and she spits a bit of stale, dried blood from her mouth. It's gross.
"Okay," Chun-Li says, a small smile forming on her face despite her increasingly ragged condition. She doesn't say anything more, though -- instead, she swoops forward, fast as a speeding train, and suddenly swings her leg up. The goal, as it turns out, is to hook her heel on the foot-ish of handcuff chain, and tug -- hard. As she tugs with her foot, though, her opposing corner's hand shoots out as well, and basically attempts to introduce itself to Jayden's brain.
COMBATSYS: Jayden blocks Chun-Li's Fierce Punch.
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Cody 1/-----==/=======|=======\===----\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 1/-------/=======|
"Never lettin' m'self be chained up like /this/ ever again," grunts the ex-Forces man. He doesn't try to resist the pull on the chain--he's covering the important parts. His head. And thank god he did; the impact is still pretty rattling, his arms going numb for a long moment. he 'knows', already, that they're not winning this fight. That is, he's pretty damn sure, in cold, clinical analysis, that the only advantages they have are numbers and Cody's insanity.
And he's sure enough that they won't be enough that he'd bet on it. (Maybe he did.)
But, well, the man in him just won't lay down without a fight. This close, it almost looks like he's trying to punch Chun's lights out, but he's not quite within arm's reach--still, as he rolls up into a crouch, his right arm starts flaring with that yellow-green energy, and he lets out a shout as he slashes his arm through the air twice, unleashing a -larger- arc of energy.
He's in an awkward position, and Chun is damn fast, so, who knows what'll happen? Probably more property destruction in the museum, one way or another.
Chun-Li yanks the handcuff chain binding Jayden and Cody together forwards, and it was, to say the least, not what Cody was expecting. It catches him halfway through the backswing on another strike with his rifle club, and the force suddenly yanks him forwards onto his knees, the rifle spinning out of his hands and skittering away across the floor.
By now, the whole 'handcuff' thing is really starting to wear on Cody. Chun-Li would be a bitch to go up against on a good day, when he /wasn't/ chained to some redneck motherfucker, and being denied the unfettered use of his right hand is making things practically unbearable.
Perhaps this is why, when presented with the opportunity to disrupt the World's Strongest Woman's attack on his teammate, Cody does not throw himself bodily into her and assail her with countless blows. What he does do, however, as Jayden winds up to unleash his TRUE (PEN)ULTIMATE POWER, is rise sharply back to his feet, his left hand snapping out and closing around one of Chun-Li's hair buns as if he was picking a fruit.
And then he starts pulling.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li parries Jayden's Sonic Scythe!
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Cody 1/-----==/=======|=======\=====--\1 Chun-Li
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Jayden 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Cody's Quick Throw.
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Cody 1/-----==/=======|=======\=====--\1 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
How does one parry a sonic scythe, exactly? There is a lot of tricky and generally theoretical science (most of it is science anyway) that goes into answering this question. Some would say that it's best to capture the sound, using proper acoustics and maybe even recording equipment. Others would say that it's best to counter it with equal sonic force, although not everyone can manage that. Chun-Li, though, just does what comes natural to her:
She kicks the projectile so hard and so fast it turns into a sonic boom, ringing through the chamber like a point-blank explosion.
Her own ears giving her nothing but tinnitus-y whine, Chun-Li is forced to rely on sight, smell, and intuition -- and a combination of the three keep her safe from Cody grabbing her hair, although he does manage to snatch off her other silk brocade, leaving both of the braided coils tied to Chun-Li's head exposed. "Hmph!" she says, clearly offended by it -- and attempts to show Cody just /how/ offended she is. With her feet.
A barrage of lightning-fast kicks come at the convicted serial thriller -- too fast to properly view them, so that it just looks like jabs of red and white streaking through the air. After a few seconds of this, Chun-Li attempts to pop Cody into the air with another, firmer kick -- before following him (and Jayden) up and flipping herself upside-down. What follows is academic: Chun-Li unfolds into a perfectly horizontal split, and begins spinning herself like the world's most violent helicopter. "HOUSENKA!"
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li successfully hits Cody with Housenka EX.
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Cody 2/<<<<<<</<<<<<<<|==-----\-------\0 Chun-Li
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Jayden 0/-------/-------|
The sudden sonic boom actually causes Cody to flinch and take a step back. After a split second he recovers, and glances down at his hand to find that it contains not Chun-Li's hair but one of her silk hair slips. With an irate growl, the blonde tosses the hair cover aside and raises his left hand back into a ready position.
It doesn't even make it there before the first of Chun-Li's lightning-fast kick crashes into his chest. The one by itself doesn't do much to slow him down, but after a third of a second, by the time the ninth has connected, Cody's stopped dead in his tracks as Chun-Li rains blows upon him. The last of the barrage comes, and Cody launches into the air, yanking Jayden's arm upwards and actually lifting him a few feet off the ground. The blonde hits the apex of his brief flight, hangs there for half a second, and then begins to fall... only to be caught by Chun-Li, Human Buzzsaw.
The helicopter assault eventually ends, if not by virtue of Chun-Li stopping than by virtue of the force of her kicks finally sending Cody flying. What would have been a far greater horizontal trip is aborted by Jayden's weight, however, and Cody doesn't so much fly as swing down into the floor like a tetherball, landing in an ugly heap.
He's down for a full six seconds, blood streaming from his face to pool underneath his prone figure... but eventually he does, slowly and uncertainly, pull himself to his feet. More alarmingly, he's grinning.
Cody lets out a brief snort of laughter, and declares, "That's more like it! This is awesome!" He reaches up to wipe some blood off of his face with his sleeve. "I'm done screwing around, though. Try to keep up, Gambit!!"
True to his word, Cody suddenly springs into motion, closing the short distance Chun-Li's kicks propelled him from her in the blink of an eye. He doesn't make even the slightest compensation for the fact that there is a man chained to him; he'll drag the motherfucker along, if he has to.
One bounding step away from Chun-Li, Cody drops into a crouch and slides the last few feet along the floor towards the World's Strongest Woman. As he comes within arm's reach of her, he rises suddenly to his feet, right arm snapping upwards in a vicious uppercut.
Halfway into the blow, Cody twists his entire forearm sharply to the right, and as the limb reaches full extension an eight-foot tall whirlwind suddenly erupts into being in front of him, threatening to engulf Chun-Li unless she gets the hell out of dodge. Across the world, every member of the Scorpions sheds a single, simultaneous tear.
Keep up?!? He isn't the one that just got plastered by Crazy legs over there! Jayden actually moves pretty smoothly with Cody--taking a prodigious leap to stay with the man, risking his arm being ripped off otherwise. For a moment, just a fraction of a second, he thinks that it might be worth it--but no. He wants to keep the arm, so he jumps, an unwilling passenger on this crazy ride.
And then he catches Cody's expression. "Gone off the deep end.. great." But he does keep up. He even decides to add to the assault--though he prudently waits for the wind to die down before launching himself up and around, throwing himself into a leaping roundhouse kick, guessing at where Chun-Li might end up--hoping to connect with the back of her head, for shock value, or maybe in the stomach--Cody's stench ought to have weakened her gastrointestinal fortitude already, right?
He's actually using the chain as a fulcrum of sorts, to change his momentum and drop down a little faster than he might normally, the better to prepare a defense against whatever Thunder Thighs might have in mind to do.
"Hope that crazy don' get us killed, boyo..."
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Cody's Criminal Upper.
[ \\\\\\\\\\ < > ////////////////// ]
Cody 1/=======/=======|==-----\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Jayden's Medium Kick.
[ \\\\\\\\\\ < > ////////////////// ]
Cody 1/=======/=======|==-----\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\\\\\\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-------|
Chun-Li only needs to hear Cody's laughter before she knows she's in trouble. She knows his, well, problem with 'having super-steroids basically part and parcel of his blood at this point,' and knows that it causes him to do things some would consider... unnatural. Like flying into this instant, laughing rage. Chun-Li, at heart, is a decent human being, so Cody's maniacal laugh actually manages to send a chill up her spine.
Still, Chun-Li isn't so rattled as to let herself be caught off-guard. She nimbly backflips, taking herself out of the path of Cody's personal whirlwind, and as she handsprings into a more 'standing' position, she dips her head just slightly -- enough that Jayden's heel grazes her hair. But only just barely.
Touching back down, Chun-Li frowns, assessing her options. Cody's gone mental, and Jayden will have to step it up just to keep Cody from using him as a weapon. Still, if she could slow Cody down somehow...
Deciding that the time is right to try and take Jayden out, Chun-Li makes the perhaps foolish move of running /toward/ the pair. Once close enough, though, her mighty legs send her back into the air, such that she tries to jump /over/ Jayden... and when the moment's right, shoot her legs out, to plant both feet into the back of the Cajun's skull.
The whirlwind disappears by exploding into a brief burst of air just in time for Jayden to make his ill-fated strike at Chun-Li. Cody even manages not to sabotage his partner's attempts, thanks in large part to the fact that it takes him a second or two to recover from such a flashy move. By the time he's got his shit back together, Chun-Li is springing into the air over Jayden's head and doing her best to give him the mother of all concussions.
The rapidly decreasing part of his brain dedicated to determining his tactics in a fight decides this offers a great opportunity. Once again, Cody's left hand snaps outwards, trying to close around Chun-Li's ankle. This proves a little tricky; Chun-Li's thighs aren't the only part of her legs that are, to put it simply, swoll.
Either way, if he can find his grip, Cody will turn sharply and swing Chun-Li over his head and slam her into the ground... and then reverse directions and do it again. It is a display of what any color commentator worth his salt would call 'some real Battletoads shit'.
COMBATSYS: Jayden endures Chun-Li's Tenshin Shuu Kyaku.
[ \\\\\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/=======/=======|====---\-------\0 Chun-Li
[ \\\ <
Jayden 0/-------/-======|
*CRACK* Jayden doesn't... he's too tired, too physically beat. He just doesn't have the reaction times he needs to fight someone like Chun-Li. Those booted feet impact the back of his skull, and it's all he can do to keep from passing out immediately. Well, that's not true--he's actually already unconscious. His last breath of action comes not from intent, but training, the movements almost automatic.
He spins--even as he's falling--and tries to simply grab Chun-Li's feet, those booted feet, and haul her down to the ground.
It isn't much, truth be told. But any unexpected change in trajectory might prove harmful to the World's Strongest Woman--
--and it's all he can manage. Now, Cody has one of two things chained to his wrist: dead weight... or a potential blunt weapon. Jayden's not gonna be awake to complain. And he does wear steel-toed boots. If he were awake, he'd say that he's pretty pissed about getting taken out--but he's also realistic enough to know that Chun-Li dominates him in many, many ways. And none of them good, at least not to his reckoning. It's a loss, but it's not a life or death loss, and he'll have to be content with that for now. Fortunately, he's not awake to wax philosophical. HAVE AT, Cody.
COMBATSYS: Jayden can no longer fight.
[ \\\\\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/=======/=======|====---\-------\0 Chun-Li
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Cody's Savage Combo.
[ \\\\\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/=======/=======|====---\-------\0 Chun-Li
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li parries Jayden's Strong Throw!
[ \\\\\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/=======/=======|======-\-------\0 Chun-Li
Chun-Li's outrageously chill ankles, clad in their pristine white booties (pristine, that is, aside from all the blood on them at the moment), are not fodder for a mere Cody to grab, and she snaps her body in mid-air to avoid his Leg Show-addled grope attempt. Luckily, in doing this, she also manages to kick Jayden's grabby mitts away, and she completes her leap unmolested. Touching down on her feet with the requisite tai chi grace, Chun-Li wipes more dried blood away from her mouth and stares down her opponent, now burdened with an unconscious military man.
"I figure you're not going to hold back, Cody," Chun-Li says, her voice calm, even, maybe a bit metarnal in its way. "But I won't either. So -- give it your best shot. And I'm sorry for what I may have to do in return." The Chinese fighter raises her open hands and delivers a very shallow, quick bow as she brings them together -- and then immediately tenses her body into attack mode.
"HYAKURETSUUUUUUUU--"
There is no appreciable pause between the first and second words of Chun-Li's cry, but in that microscopic gap she is able to fit at least seven kicks, aiming them for Cody's head and shoulder -- specifically, the shoulder that is now stuck dragging Jayden around.
"--KYAKUUUUUU!"
COMBATSYS: Cody endures Chun-Li's Hyakuretsu Kyaku EX.
[ \\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 2/<<<<<<</<<<<<<<|=======\-------\0 Chun-Li
Cody lets out a grunt as Chun-Li slips away from his grasp, and the next thing he knows his right arm is being dragged downwards as Jayden goes down like Poison after a beer and a half or dinner at anywhere nicer than Wendy's. Chun-Li sticks the landing, and the blonde just turns to stare at her, one corner of his mouth turned upwards in a vicious grin.
Once the World's Strongest Woman has said her piece, and as she offers the now solo Travers a bow, Cody spits out a mouthful of blood, and announces, "You talk too much."
Chun-Li springs forwards, and in the same instant, Cody hauls his right arm back and then swings it up and over his head. The handcuff chain snaps taut, and then Jayden lifts off the ground by his still handcuffed arm, swinging out behind Cody and slowly arcing up into the air above him.
Cody's arm has yet to begin swinging forward when Chun-Li's kicks connect, and though they strike home over and over, elicting meaty thuds and the occasional sharp crack as the blonde's bones crack, he doesn't slow down. He doesn't even flinch.
Jayden's bodyswings fully up above Cody's head, and, all of a sudden, blue light flashes from the man's arm, and in a wavery circle at his feet. Also, there are action lines everywhere, it's mad crazy.
Cody snaps his arm forwards, and Jayden goes crashing down towards Chun-Li like a giant, man-shaped flail. As the blonde's arm descends, it trails transparent blue afterimages, lending the illusion of alacrity to something that is, in actuality, very, very slow.
It makes up for it in other ways. When Jayden's body hits the floor (lolololo), whether or not Chun-Li happens to be between the Cajun man and the ground, the force of the blow drives a four foot diameter crater into the flooring and elicits a shockwave that spreads out in every direction, carrying a wave of dust with it and leaving spiderweb cracks in its wake.
Out in the parking lot, a car alarm goes off.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Cody's Random Weapon!.
[ \\\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/-------/=======|=======\-------\0 Chun-Li
Jayden's body crashes down, creating that horrible shockwave of property damage and Jayden damage -- and Chun-Li is just short of being struck by it, her quick street-fighting reflexes keeping her one step ahead of Cody's man-weapon game with a limber leap to one side. "Okay," she says, "enough. No more talk."
The World's Strongest Woman leaps again -- this time summoning up something Gen taught her, long ago.
SOME TIME AGO
Chun-Li is dressed in workout togs matted with blood, sweat, and tears -- literally. She's just finished dragging huge stones up a steep hill, because if she's to sleep in Gen's ancient house, she must repair a decrepit old wall -- in the style that it was originally built, long, long ago. This is /after/ the wrist training and the ankle training and lunch, which consisted of trying to eat while Gen punched her in the stomach at no set rhythm.
"Now," Gen says, stroking his long beard, "I will teach you to be lighter than the very breeze. /If/ you are capable of it, anyway. Hmpf."
What follows is a long montage of Chun-Li trying, and failing, to jump onto a large palm frond without the frond bending or giving way. She fails. About two hundred times.
"Hmpf!" says Gen.
NOW
Chun-Li leaps -- and touches down on the taut chain of the handcuffs. One toe presses down, but at the same time doesn't press at all -- the chain remains taut, even seeming to support Chun-Li's weight as she stands on it. Only one foot, mind -- the other is soaring toward Cody's face at positively unholy velocity.
COMBATSYS: Cody endures Chun-Li's Fierce Kick.
[ \\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/--=====/=======|=======\-------\0 Chun-Li
Cody looks up in surprise when Chun-Li lands on the taut handcuff chain like something out of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. His surprised expression only lasts about a third of a second before the World'S Strongest Woman... uh... kicks him in the fucking face.
It isn't fancy, but it works; all of a sudden there's a huge gash on Cody's forehead, one that literally gushes blood, and Cody takes a stumbling step back, dragging Jayden's unconcious body a foot or two across the floor.
He's not down quite yet, though; the still-taut handcuff chain is suddenly yanked out from underneath Chun-Li as Cody jerks his arm to the right and begins spinning, using the power of CENTRIFUGAL FORCE to suddenly lift Jayden up off the ground in a barely-controlled horizontal swing. Once again, blue light, action lines, afterimages, yadda yadda.
This newfound strategy only works for about a second, the time it takes Cody to swing his unconcious teammate around at Chun-Li like a wrecking ball. Whether or not he actually hits this time, the stressed handcuff chain finally snaps, sending Jayden soaring across the cavernous museum room.
Cody, however, keeps spinning several times, staggering away from Chun-Li as he desperately tries to keep his balance. He fails, collapsing into a heap on the floor some ten feet away, propping his upper body upright with his arms, breathing in rapid, shallow gasps as blood pours from his face to pool on the ground. Weakly, he clambers onto all fours, his breathing getting faster and faster...
COMBATSYS: Cody has reached second wind!
[ \\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 0/-------/--=====|=======\-------\0 Chun-Li
Suddenly, his hand snaps into the air and crashes into the floor, spreading another small network of cracks out underneath him. A second later, he repeats the motion... and, suddenly, flecks of neon green appear in the blood cascading from his face. Within two seconds, flecks has become ribbons, and before long /all/ of the blood pouring from the man's body is not red but bright, luminescent green.
Slowly, unsteadily, Cody rises to his feet, wavering briefly before he finds his balance. Much as his blood has changed color, so too as his eyes, which now glow bright solid green without any traces of, you know, irises, or pupils, or any of that important eye shit.
Cody stares at the World's Strongest Woman for a few beats, and then throws his head back and starts laughing.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li dodges Cody's Random Weapon!.
[ \\\\\\\ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 0/-------/--=====|=======\-------\0 Chun-Li
Chun-Li ducks as Jayden goes flying toward her -- he crashes into some crates and junk, which presumably break his fall. Chun-Li is relieved for a moment, before realizing that -- unlike every other SNF ever -- there are no producers, cameramen, medics or anything that immediately appear to be on hand. So she'll have to finish this quick, and make sure Jayden isn't dead.
Then, Chun-Li looks back to Cody -- and sees something truly terrifying. As Cody begins to /Glow the fuck out/, the Most Dangerous Woman in the World suddenly doesn't feel quite as dangerous -- or, rather, she feels a bit outdone in the 'danger to oneself and others' category, to say the least. "Cody," she whispers, brown eyes widening a bit as she pulls herself to her feet. She's seen horrors -- but that doesn't make them less horrible.
No time to ponder the mysteries of Glow, though. Chun-Li barrels forward, putting safety last as one must, and surges yet another kick toward Cody's drug-dripping grill. A pounding series of kicks with one leg -- then the other -- then switching again, to swoop her leg in a high arc that seeks out Cody's jaw, to connect with positively explosive force.
COMBATSYS: Cody endures Chun-Li's Houyoku Sen.
[ < > ///////////////// ]
Cody 1/-----==/=======|==-----\-------\0 Chun-Li
Cody keeps on laughing like a maniac as Chun-Li closes in again, and indeed even after the blows begin coming. The man makes no motion to defend himself as the World's Strongest Woman unleashes kick after kick into his face. Within seconds, Chun-Li's entire calf is practically coated in bright green blood.
The final kick of the flurry catches Cody right underneath the chin, and he sways backwards like a weeble full of blood... and then, yet again, there is a small ethereal lightshow, this time not in blue but in the same green that colors the man's blood and eyes.
He comes out of the sway in an abrupt spin, lashing out with his right foot at Chun-Li's hip. He follows it up with another kick, and then another, and then another, andthenanotherandthenanotherand--
You get the point. The individual kicks aren't nearly as fast as Chun-Li's, or probably even, truth be told, as powerful... but there are a lot of them, and Cody delivers them with an utter lack of concern for his own well being. In fact, he kicks so much that by the end of the four-second long combination of kicks he begins rising into the air, possibly even bringing Chun-Li with him.
He finishes the combination with a powerful, two-legged dropkick, and then drops back to the floor. He doesn't even have time to straighten up before he sways and collapses forwards onto his knees, shoulders and chest heaving. For several seconds, it looks like he's going to fling the vom.
COMBATSYS: Cody can no longer fight.
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Chun-Li 0/-------/-----==|
And then he does, pitching forward and vomiting a horrible slurry of green blood, bile, and Philadelphia cheesesteak onto the ground in front of him. He rocks back onto his knees and then pitches backwards, collapsing into a heap. Slowly, the green taint to his blood recedes, and within six or seven seconds, he's back to gushing good old God-fearing American red blood.
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li interrupts Dead End Irony from Cody with Tenshou Kyaku.
[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Chun-Li 0/-------/---====|
As Cody charges, Chun-Li is ready. Sort of. His hammering blows strike hard -- one breaks her collarbone almost immediately, and another hits her in the hips so hard with what can only be desribed as a 'turbo miscarriage' level of force. Chun-Li spits blood when another smashes her cheek and personally impacts one of her wisdom teeth (post-growing-in), and she struggles against the tide, seeming for a moment like she may succumb to the rush of Glow-infused superkicks.
Then, though, something /magical/ happens. As Cody rears back for his big dropkick -- Chun-Li swoops her leg up and kicks him right in chest. Maybe he's already unconscious by the time it happens. Maybe this is the straw that breaks the camel's back. But either way, it does the job, and Cody is left a vomiting, quivering heap by the time Chun-Li's feet are done assaulting him.
The World's Strongest Woman, covered in blood -- both her own, which is red, and Cody's, which is electric Ecto-Cooler green -- stands, hands on her knees, bent over and struggling to take in deep breaths. Each one brings a fresh shot of pain, particularly from the busted collarbone. Carefully -- she doesn't want to let it slip and puncture anything -- she looks to Jayden, confirming that he's still breathing, and then to Cody, doing the same.
Then Chun-Li moves toward a wall, and presses herself against it. She slowly slumps down into a sitting position, looking skyward. "I told... you... I was... sorry... for what... I'd have to... do..." she wheezes, voice labored and pained. "And... I... meant it."
COMBATSYS: Chun-Li has ended the fight here.
Log created on 15:37:32 10/31/2009 by Chun-Li, and last modified on 22:29:28 11/28/2009.