Description: We've got SCION fever, it's burning in our brain! We've got SCION fever, it's driving us insane! In possibly one of the best MARKETING CAMPAIGNS that SCION has ever done, they've worked with Howard Enterprises to set up the last WARRIOR'S BELT Title Match of the SNF Season! Mike Bison faces off against Mike Haggar in the battle of the Mike's to see who will come out victorious. SURPRISE! They both get to call on a bubbly blonde wrestler-to-be to help them out! (Winner: Haggar)
COMBATSYS: Haggar has started a fight here on the left meter side.
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Haggar 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: M.Bison has joined the fight here.
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Haggar 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 M.Bison
COMBATSYS: M.Bison has joined the fight here on the right meter side.
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Haggar 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 M.Bison
COMBATSYS: R.Mika has joined the fight here in the center.
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Haggar 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
Mayor Mike Haggar of Metro City is very serious about this fight. Though he hasn't wrestled in the squared circle in many years, he's still a sportsman at heart, with SlamMasters being as much about the prowess of the wrestlers as it was about the scripted storylines - seriously, like at least a third of those fights were real! Title belts are kind of a big deal to him.
He's standing in the dealership, wearing a very professional-looking suit, hands clasped behind his back, his mouth a thin line. A thug like this, the champion of this season of Saturday Night Fight? Mike Haggar cannot let this stand, knowing just what kind of lows Bison will stoop to. Slowly, he reaches forward, clasping his hands together... and waits, muscles tensed.
His mustache bristles with righteous power.
SCION Car Dealership! Cameras, cars and customers abound!
"AIIIIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! Move move move! She's not gonna stop!" Rainbow Mika is hanging out the side of a golf cart, yelling at anyone she can see. Yoko Harmageddon is in a hurry to drop her pupil off, and very rarely uses the brakes even when she's not in a hurry. People dart back and forth, dodging out of the way of the oncoming cart. Wheels squeal, narrowly avoiding a prized SCION.
Seconds later, the sound of another girlish scream and a crashing cart can be heard.
"Owwwwwwwwwwwwwww!"
From around the corner comes two blonde pigtails, a hand brushing through one and throwing the remains of a salesman's lunch to the ground. "Ewww! Next time I'm hopping off first and running behind! It's better exercise anyhow!"
At least Ms. Harmageddon didn't break a window, or a car, or a person.
"Mike Haggar!" Running the rest of the way, pigtails flying behind her, the up-and-coming wrestler bounces along. "You're almost as great as Zangief! This is so awesome," she says as she hops up and down like an enthralled wrestling fan.
What the hell. Now they're fightin' in a Scion dealership? Man, these guys have no idea what kind of property damage is gonna ensue, do they? Or maybe they do. But then they should've been in a Volvo dealership....
... eh, whatever. Bison isn't in the dealership, not yet, but when he arrives... he will be arriving -in style-. And on a Harley Davidson, see, because he's ridin' his chopper right through the front windows of the dealership.
>>>>>CRASH<<<<<
The chopper--Bison's chopper--bursts the glass windows then he screeches it to a halt. "Alright. I heard someone 'round here... some TOOL who thinks his 'stache is hot... stuck in the freakin' 70s... wants my belt." Of course he knows WHO is challenging him. But he likes to make insults.
Carefully, he dismounts the bike, setting it in park and takin' the keys out, pocketing them. "So you think you can take it.. well, C'MON!!" Mika? Who's Mika? Some wrestler... he -hates- wrestlers...
'Almost' as great as Zangief. Haggar's right eye twitches - that Russian ripped off the Spinning Clothesline from him, after all! - but he submerges the old irritation to give a grin and a nod toward R. Mika, whom he has heard of - he always follows the careers of other wrestlers on the grand fighting circuit. "Thanks, kid."
M. Bison arrives, of course then distracting Haggar. "Hmph! There's the disrespectful punk." Fabric creaks as, in response, Haggar begins to press in on his hands, flexing every muscle on his body. The suit visibly strains. "Scum like you, Bison... I can't stand it. People who think fighting's just about getting a bigger paycheck. It's about more than that." A seam bursts on his pants. "It's about self-improvement! It's about defending others! It's about all these things..." Haggar stretches out his arms, eyes flashing, and slams his fists together.
In a mighty shredding sound, the suit gives way, fabric exploding off of his body to reveal Haggar in his old wrestling outfit - dark green tights, big orange-plated wrestling boots, and of course, the single leather strap. "...and it's about inspiring others to reach for an ideal you set, being a role model! You don't understand any of that... and you don't deserve to be a champion!"
He grinned! This is so cool! Rainbow Mika stops bouncing long enough to peer at the Harley coming out the window. Blinking, she calls out, "Are you related to Ms. Harmageddon?" Surely the crashing-through-windows trait isn't all that common? They're all scary like the Kool-Aid Man gone wrong.
"OoOoOoOH! Mike Haggar, YOU WILL BE CHAMPION!" Fist pumping, she smiles at the man. Hands set to her hips, eyes behind the mask sending a scowl toward Bison. She might have to work for both of them but she's going to cheer for the wrestler no matter what!
Haggar's impassioned speech is met with a flat stare from Bison. "Ya think?" he drawls, mockingly. Scum? It's the streets, man, that made Bison what he was. He had no choice in it. It wasn't anything he wanted except to survive... But Haggar wouldn't understand that. Silver spoon, wrestling champion... Bison spits, the loogie *thwacking* audibly against the windshield of a xB.
"Think ya know me. Think ya understand me. Well, Mister Mike Haggar... you don't know -shit- about me. You the man who's the scum, you unnerstand? You think those thick muscles o' yours gonna -inspire- anyone? You don't know the poor. Only thing inspires 'em... is col' hard cash. An' in the end..."
Bison punches his hand into the hood of a nearby tC, then pulls, ripping it out with a crunching, shrieking sound. Twist... and HURL.
"In the end, Haggar, I held this belt all by my goddamn self!! YOU AIN'T TAKIN' IT!!"
COMBATSYS: Haggar endures M.Bison's Large Thrown Scion.
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Haggar 0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
Haggar just puts his head down and blasts his way through the thrown car. It smashes into his face, metal cutting his forehead, but he punches both fists out and swings to the side, tearing it in half and flinging the parts to either side - they each hit a car. A little ticker appears on the TVs of the Viewers At Home, and begins counting the property damage in the fight.
It's already getting up there.
"Hmph. Sounds like you didn't crack open my biography." His hand lashes out, trying to grip Bison right in his fat face, to pull him off-balance and in close to him, before taking to the air. This technique... already?! "Besides, I've got many new public works programs coming through for the new year! 2009 is the year of Metro!"
"AAAAAAaaaaacccccK!" Rainbow Mika hits the deck to avoid getting hit with the car as it flies toward the man she's standing beside.
"That poor, poor car!" Rolling over, she hops up to her feet. "Zangief wouldn't stand for this! Get him!" So far as cheering squads go, she's not the best cheerleader in the world. Priorities first and all that. She's going to keep it up though, trying to goad the wrestler into winning!
COMBATSYS: Haggar knocks away M!Bison with Screw Piledriver!
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Haggar 0/-------/--=====|====---\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
Haggar gets ahold of M!Bison, dragging him up into the air with him, and immediately spins him around, locking his arms and legs onto him, shoving his body down so that his head is dangling quite dangerously low beneath him. His momentum takes him into a rapid spin, and he hurls high into the air.
The landing point is a beautiful SCION kL, their larger SUV-style model. There's a lot of car to be driven through.
This, already. Bison smirks. "Read your... who the -hell- reads your biography 'cept those lameasses who wanna stick a nose up your ass?!?" Please. Read Haggar's biography? As if. Of course, this doesn't help him against Haggar--whose spinning piledriver slams Bison right through that Scion kL. Oh, he shoulda -known- this kind of shit would happen... goddamn blonde cheerleader thing. Never impartial, are they? Always gotta love the man with the freakin' stache.
Bison rolls away and up to his feet, pieces of car rolling off his shoulders. "Henh. Least you can fight... not like some of the pussies who came after this thing..." He's actually mostly okay if it goes away here--because the damn belt's being taken away from him ANYWAY, next week...
"OI, BLONDIE!" he yells, at the would-be cheerleader. "You supposed t' help us out aint'cha? WELL GET IN THERE!" Bison, himself, simply roars, and charges Haggar anwyays, intent on putting a big fist right into Haggar's ugly 'stache.
Rainbow Mika is about to raise her hand, showing that -SHE- has read the biography, but then Bison continues and her hand drops. Embarrassment forces her cheeks to pinken briefly. Her head shakes, causing blonde pigtails to fly from side to side.
"WHA-- oh." A hand sets to the back of her neck, giving it a slight rub. "RIGHT! That's my job! I'm helping!" Not a fight of her own, but that's fine. "Sorry about this Mike Haggar! Just doing my job!"
Attacking on command like a hyperactive blonde guard dog, the girl twists away from Haggar. She hops forward a step, then LAUNCHES herself backward, buttocks first toward the Mayor of Metro!
COMBATSYS: Haggar blocks M.Bison's Dash Straight.
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Haggar 0/-------/-======|=====--\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
COMBATSYS: R.Mika successfully hits Haggar with Shooting Peach.
- Power hit! -
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Haggar 1/-------/=======|=====--\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
Mike Haggar's biography, "Suplexing the Streets", is very good, filled with insights into the world of professional wrestling and the office of mayor alike. The omission of anything related to the Mad Gear purgings has left readers gnashing at the bit for his next novel, "Taking Care of Business," which deals exclusively with the events surrounding that - included will be chapters written by the other six Haggarfriends (except maybe Cody, because Cody) (and maybe Dean where is he right now anyway Hawaii or something?).
Haggar springs far away from Bison after the piledriver, and has plenty of time to see Bison's punch coming - he crosses his forearms together, and lets the boxer impact with a thump, sliding back only a few inches. He tries to use that momentum to throw himself back and away from the flying Mika, but she crashes right into his chest despite his best efforts, stumbling to the side and dropping to a knee. "Hm! Not bad, kid, if a bit..." He looks for a word. "Unorthodox."
Haggar rolls his neck with a series of pops and punches out to the side, his fist driving right through the grill of a Scion tC, pulling it in toward him. Think he could think he could think he could LIFT A SCION ONE-HANDED? The Mayor rises magnificently, the car attached to his fist like a massive cyborg hand, and he unceremoniously swipes it at the boxer, lunging forward. "HOOYEAH! Alright, kid, now you show /me/ what ya got!" He fires Mika a thumbs up, and points at Bison.
"AUUUUGGH!" Hitting Haggar in the chest is somewhat like hitting a brick wall with your behind. She bounces off of it once he stumbles, landing on the ground with a thud. Her hand slips down to rub at her rear, yet she's making a squinty-eyed smile.
"T-THANKS! I'm sorry that it hit you so hard though!" Maybe she can get some secondary training from him? He's not Zangief, but he's close!
Though Rainbow Mika spaces for a second while she's considering asking him that oh-so-important question, she turns to face Haggar and nods twice.
"SURE THING, MIKE HAGGAR!" The thumbs up is returned as she flips her attention over to Bison. Grinning brightly, she keeps her back to him and fliiiiiiiiiies through the air, trying to get there before the SCION makes a swing for him. Again, she's attacking buttocks first -- hey! It's what she does! Besides, it's a wonderful feeling traveling through the air at such a speed!
COMBATSYS: M.Bison blocks Haggar's Random Scion.
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Haggar 1/-------/=======|======-\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
COMBATSYS: R.Mika successfully hits M.Bison with Shooting Peach.
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Haggar 1/-------/=======|=======\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|------=
Bison's problems are complicated by... well, by a Mika to the face. Butt-first, which he can at least appreciate for a few moments; fortunately, getting her in the face is a far better proposition than getting Mike Haggar in the face. It allows him to, at least, take the impact of that car a lot better than Haggar was perhaps hoping for; Bison growls as he shoves the car away, more carbits sticking to his skin. Probably from minor puncture wounds, like he's even noticing.
"Nngh. Can't ever face me one on one, Haggar..." That isn't really an insult so much as an observation, his voice more in mutter-mode than shouting mode. The boxing maniac then grabs Mika--by the butt--and shoves her at Haggar. "G'wan, do somethin'!" He's going to be... right here, mostly.
Gettin' pumped up, growling, flexing, making a nuisance of himself. Smashing the engine block on the tC model he ripped open earlier, maybe to fashion himself a weapon...?
COMBATSYS: M.Bison gathers his will.
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Haggar 1/-------/=======|=======\===----\1 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|------=
"But I just..." Rainbow Mika is painstakingly rubbing her buttocks, loathe to get up and help the boxer again. "You sure? I mean, you only get me twice!" The blonde lifts herself up off of the ground again and smiles at Haggar.
"Okay! Get ready! I've got this trick up my sleeve, and I'm not afraid to use it!" Up her very scant sleeves this is!
Moving behind Haggar, she starts to try and hoist him up into a German suplex, bridging her body backward in order to slam him shoulder first into the pavement.
COMBATSYS: Haggar dodges R.Mika's German Suplex.
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Haggar 1/-------/=======|=======\===----\1 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
"Don't give me that, I don't make the matches, mutters Haggar - truth be told, he was hoping on a straight one-on-one, but I guess the SNF writers don't think those get viewings!
The camera briefly cuts to Geese, swimming in a big pool of yen, making little money reppukens and laughing and laughing.
Mika gets ahold of Haggar, who doesn't show surprise at being lifted - fighters do this kind of thing all the time - but does manage to react quickly, kicking off with his feet, giving the girl too much momentum to work with, breaking free before hitting the ground and flipping through the air to his feet. "You give the opponent too much time after securing the hold, gotta be ready to snap the suplex off immediately!"
Fatherly wrestling advice dispensed, Haggar immediately bowls forward, stepping around R. Mika to charge in at Bison, rolling briefly, and springing off the ground in a textbook dropkick, air spiraling around his feet as he spins in toward Bison's chest.
COMBATSYS: M.Bison endures Haggar's Drop Kick.
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Haggar 1/-----==/=======|=======\=====--\1 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
"That's... That's... GREAT ADVICE! THANKS!" Hopping up, she moves over to the side to allow the two men to attack each other like wild animals, so she can prepare for the next time Super Mikachu is called into battle! The blonde thumbs up again at Haggar and bounces back and forth between one foot and the other, just anxiously waiting to be able to show another wrestler what she can do beyond buttocks attacks!
Yeah, yeah. These sadistic SNF organizers love tossing weird things into these fights... the cars, the strikers. It's true, Haggar didn't make this fight. But he's here and that's good enough for Bison's ire. He shows no disappointment or ire that Haggar's able to avoid Mika's attempt to suplex--Bison sent her in as a distraction, nothing more. When Haggar comes in for that flying kick, though... Bison's ready for it. He flexes his chest, thrusts it outwards, just as Haggar comes in. The impact is clean--but instead of potentially throwing Bison off his feet, he remains steady--more than steady--and just a second later...
He's hurling himself forward, his right fist cocked back, already closing the gap with Haggar. Perhaps he's forgotten how Haggar manhandled him before... or perhaps he doesn't care. The air is filled with a terrifying, terrific roar, as Bison seeks to land a single punch on Haggar, a single massive, devastating punch...
COMBATSYS: Haggar endures M.Bison's Gigaton Blow+.
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Haggar 1/=======/=======|-------\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
Haggar feels his drop kick impact solidly, and his experience tells him exactly how this is going to go down. He has to recover from the attack - easy enough, a short backflip off the boxer's chest - but the hit wasn't enough, he's not even staggered. Judging from how this fight has been going, there's only one thing coming up next.
Haggar springs off, performs the tightest backflip he's ever done in his life, landing on his feet, his hands already cupped around his chest to receive the Gigaton Blow an instant later.
Ribs crack, dust and debris flying away from the two of them - but Haggar only barely slides back, growling, his hands wrapped around Bison's wrist. Blood trickles from the sides of his mouth. "Mika... finish him off after this!" the mayor roars, sweeping his left leg back.
Haggar suddenly pulls Bison out of the momentum of the already-successful Gigaton Blow, tearing him off his feet and pumping his own legs in a circle, still holding him by that wrist. Haggar's growl turns into a snarl as he spins once, twice, three times - then hops, whizzing him like a helicopter in the air before releasing him toward the piece de resistance of the Scion display - a pyramid of five of the cars, being 'benched' by a giant sculpture of Geese Howard himself.
COMBATSYS: Haggar knocks away M!Bison with Giant Swing!
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Haggar 0/-------/---====|=======\-------\0 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-------
Here is one of the world's greatest wrestlers (though not THE greatest... that spot is reserved 100% for ZANGIEF!), asking for her help in his hour of need! Rainbow Mika is here, on duty, willing to do this! It's not just her job, it's... well it will be fun!
With the chance of Bison going airborne toward the beautiful pyramid of cars (poor cars!), she knows what she must do.
Before Bison can crash all the way to the bottom of the pyramid, she leaps up into the air, the weight of her hips shifting so she can crash against his chest and SLAM him the rest of the way to the ground.
"FOR MIKE HAGGAR!"
COMBATSYS: M.Bison endures R.Mika's Hip Buster.
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Haggar 0/-------/---====|=======\=------\1 M.Bison
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R.Mika 0|-------|-----==
This seems familiar. Bison momentarily freaks out at just how fast Haggar is moving--and before he can say a damn thing, he's caught up in it. Caught up and swung around, slammed... tossed into the air, where Mika adds her own hip signature to the whole thing. Bison comes crashing down into the world of Scions, literally splattering into an xB's back end.
And then he climbs out. Shaking with pain, with anger, with rage. Maybe Mr. Haggar here -has- just won the belt. Bison doesn't know. Doesn't care. He's screaming in his head, his eyes bugged out hugely. All he knows is...
He can't freakin' -stand- Mike Haggar. Presumptuous, pompous ass with a mustache that belongs as handlebars on his daughter.
Bison bellows... and even though he's already falling into unconsciousness, his subconscious is still at work. It's an impossible distance to cross and yet he tries, once again, that big right hand screaming forward.... can Haggar survive?!? Or will Bison defend his belt even post-knockout?!?
COMBATSYS: M.Bison can no longer fight.
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Haggar 0/-------/---====|
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R.Mika 0|-------|-----==
COMBATSYS: Haggar counters Gigaton Blow+ from M.Bison with Hammer Thru.
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Haggar 0/-------/-======|
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R.Mika 0|-------|-----==
Very familiar.
Just like last time, Haggar stands, watching M.Bison come on, but this time, it's broad daylight. He waits until he's right there, and suddenly drops to a knee.
The Gigaton Blow sweeps just over his shoulder, skinning the leather strap, snapping it in half.
Then Haggar stands, knocking the fist aside, his own arms coming up in a tremendous sweep to barrel into the boxer's chest and send him back from whence he came. "YOU NEED MORE THAN THAT!"
Haggar finishes in a slow spin, dropping back to his knee, and coughing with one hand to his chest. He tilts his head to the side, spits out a gob of blood (his rib probably poked his lung, it's OK, this happens all the time), and wipes his mouth with the back of his left hand as he comes back to a standing position.
"Hmmph... damn trash."
"YOU WON!" Rainbow Mika starts to bounce up and down again, her way of cheering excitedly because the wrestler won (with her help? Naw! He probably could have done it all on his own).
She starts off to ask about that whole training thing, when the screech of tires winds through the debris of other vehicles. Words die upon her lips as she's yanked up into a golf cart and it starts to drive off at speeds that no golf cart should ever drive off at.
"AUUUUUUUUGH! Ms. Harmageddon! But I wanted to..."
"BE QUIET! WE MUST GET BACK TO TRAINING! YOU WERE PITIFUL OUT THERE! I SHOULD MAKE YOU RUN ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE BEACH!"
Off they blast into the sunse-- okay. There's no sunset, but they're heading that way anyhow!
COMBATSYS: R.Mika has left the fight here.
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Haggar 0/-------/-======|
Mika gets a pat on the head from Haggar, because she is so very short, and he looks about to say something.
The golf cart obviously catches him off guard! He springs back away from it, snatching his hand away before it gets taken away by the horrors of Yoko Harmageddon. He stays in that pose for a few comical moments, before putting the cap on the evening, turning around to regard the crowd, thrusting one finger into the air, and yelling "YEAAAAH!" To cap it all off, Jessica comes out of the crowd, and jumps up into Haggar's other arm, mirroring the sign, like something right out of the 80s.
Behind the scenes, a tech grimly takes a sponge to the title belt, wearing noseplugs.
Because M. Bison peed all over it.
Log created on 16:25:19 01/04/2009 by R.Mika, and last modified on 11:46:58 01/31/2009.