Match of the Millennium

Description: San Francisco is totally doing an egg race of its own. The contestants: MAI SHIRANUI, ALEXIS LOVELL, and MINAL "MINT" PANESH, will be tasked with carrying eggs down the treacherous slopes of Lombard Street, San Francisco. They will each be given a spoon, and one decorated egg. Their mission, if they choose to accept it, will be to rest the egg on a spoon, and race down hill as fast as possible.

[MAI]
Lombard Street, San Francisco, has developed something of a reputation for its steep, almost hazardous hills and winding turns. Traffic here comes to a deadlock due to the roads on a normal day, but today Lombard is free of cars. Why? Well, because it's the site of a fighting event, of course! A race, you might say, were it not for the participants involved.

One of this participants is one Mai Shiranui, a ninja whose reputation already precedes her. As this is a festive Easter event, Mai has went out of her way to dress for the occasion. Unfortunately, dressing for the occasion in Mai's case has made her no more tasteful than usual--she looks like her first pick for a "rabbit" attire was to visit an adult costume shop. Mai is presently dressed in red leotard (the same color as her usual kimono), pantyhose, heels, and a pair of big, floppy rabbit ears! The whole wardrobe is, of course, borderline scandalous on Mai's figure, but such is the way of Mai Shiranui. For that matter, how does she intend to race in heels? Perhaps the better question is how does Mai /ever/ move the way she does in what she normally wears?

Whatever the case, Mai is already posed to get started. She's got not one, but two spoons parked precariously in her mouth and balancing a set of Easter eggs. This seems like a recipe of disaster.

"I hope Andy is watching," Mai says to no one in particular. She looks about the crowd, either oblivious--or unconcerned, about the other attention she's getting.

[MINT]
Sure, sign up, they said. You've done SNF before, so what's the big deal, they said. It all sounded like such a good idea then.

Minal "Mint" Panesh grumbles as she tightens the chinstrap. The purpose of her cranial is to keep her skull safe in the event a piece of metal flies out and hits her in the head. Its -purpose- is not hampered by several layers of craft paint. In fact, the festive Easter-themed paintjob -- a base coat of white, with several decorative splashes of lavender, cyan, and fuschia -- will probably provide additional protection to its wearer in the event of a fall. ...The fluffy cloth bunny ears that have been riveted on, though? Doubtful that those wil help in the event of an accident.

The dark-skinned Indian woman is not... exactly happy with it though. Nor is she happy that her helpful crew had intercepted her duffel before her trip on the airplane, leaving her with only an arctic camoflage uniform -- rather than her preferred olive drab -- and a vest made of shiny white vinyl, decorated to match the corporal's cranial.

The PFW camera crew manages to catch sight of the Marine sulking, for just a few seconds before she notices them. Once she does, her demeanor shifts from impotent frustration into an awkward, halfhearted smile. "Oh, hey there," she says to her invisible viewership, "looks like it's about time to start, heh heh..."

She launches into a brisk jog, exiting the staging area provided to her by the event staff. She raises one of her giant metal hands to block the light of the bright San Francisco day while her squinting eyes adjust. The voices of people crowding around the edges of the zig-zagging Lombard Street lilt their way to her ears -- and the fake smile grows a bit more honest. It -has- been a while since the corporal has been involved in one of these fancy SNF events, but she remembers why she likes them now.

All smiles, she notices the lady in red -- and her smile turns into an awkward gape. 'Yeah, there is -no- way I'd be comfy wth that outfit,' she thinks to herself. But rather than voice her thought -- as anything more than her so-not-a-poker-face, anyway -- she waves her giant metal hands in greeting. "Hey! Looks like I'm one of your opponents today! Best of luck to y--"

The hesitation comes as the New Jersey Indian's eyes drift to the heels. "... You, 'cause... y'might need it runnin' downhill in those, right?"

[ALEXIS]
Bwum, bwum, bwum.

From beside the pair of Mint and Mai comes the sound of a guitar string being plucked - not playing a song, but the subtle adjustments in pitch as the instrument is played would signal perhaps even to the non-musically-inclined that the guitar is being tuned. Cameras pan over, and at least two fans watching at home probably freak out in excitement: as promised, Alexis "Killasaurus Lex" Lovell, the absentee alt-rocker, is here in the flesh, after disappearing completely from the public radar for weeks, if not months - even from her bandmates in Killasaurus Orphanage, leading to - well, more on that later!

Speaking of 'in the flesh,' Alexis' outfit definitely contends with Mai's in anti-modesty: she's dressed in a white bikini with pink straps, with fuzzy white fur obviously intended to represent her lagomorphic nature providing coverage for the front and a white bunny tail providing coverage (barely) in the rear. Matching white ears and wrist cuffs adorn her head and wrists, and she too has a pair of high heels - white ones, with fuzzy ankle straps. A red teardrop gem familiar to no one present but Alexis herself hangs from a fuzzy white collar around her neck.

"Guess I'm gonna need some luck, too," she remarks between clenched teeth - clenched because they're currently holding her spoon and the Canadian-Flag-decorated egg she's been designated as transporter for while her hands are busy finalizing the tuning on her orange-and-green electric guitar.

Yes, it's orange and green because it's designed to look like a carrot.

With the guitar in tune, she slings it back over her back. "Nice outfits," she says to Mai and Mint with a nod toward the pair. Her attention shifts slightly toward Mai. "So, handicap match, eh? Not sure what you did to make them mad at you..."

Her brow creases. "Wait a minute. I'm starting to get deja vu here..."

[MAI]
Mai takes a moment to respond, as she has to move the spoons from her mouth to do so. She balances both between index finger and middle finger. For those who have not yet noticed, Mai's eggs are painted with the iconic Rising Sun with some sort of Japanese character on the opposite side, which closer inspection reveals say "Mai" on one and "Shiranui" on the other. Conceited, much?

"Thank you!" Mai addresses Mint, "I'm Mai Shiranui. It's nice to meet you--oh, and these?" Mai lifts a foot. "I should be fine! They just take practice."

Her attention shifts to Alexis. "Oh, I'm not sure! I think maybe my reputation precedes me...but anyway! Good luck to you both!"

And with that, Mai returns to stretching, placing her spoons back in her mouth and pulling her arms up behind her head. At least one camera may linger as she does so, but such is the coverage of Mai's fights.

But in a moment, the starting gun is fired and the race starts! Mai takes off at full tilt, taking only two steps before launching into a flying leap that sends her up and onto a fence post--on which she balances perfectly in spite of her attire. "Sorry, but I can't go easy with two against one!" Mai says, smoothly pulling a steel fan from her top and snapping it open. "Was this in your deja vu?" she asks snapping the fan into a spinning throw toward Alexis' legs!

COMBATSYS: Mai has started a fight here.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Mai              0/-------/-------|

COMBATSYS: Mint has joined the fight here on the right meter side.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Mai              0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0             Mint

COMBATSYS: Alexis has joined the fight here.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Mai              0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0             Mint
[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/-------|

[MINT]
It isn't until Mai moves the spoons from her mouth that Minal comes to an important realization.
"... Crap, I knew I forgot something!"
And instantly, she turns on her heel and runs back into the staging area. It's at that moment that she collides with a PFW staffer, practically bowling him over. The staffer was carrying an egg -- decorated with a highly stylized mint leaf on a field of cyan and magenta -- and a spoon. While the staffer flies backwards from his collision with the off-balanced Marine, the egg flies upwards in a graceful arc...

"Oh. Hey! Thanks!" chirps out the Indian-American. The entire -point- of this outing is about to scramble itself upon a brickwork planter, and she's... nonchalant about it? With a whirr of mechanical servos, Mint twirls about on a heel -- the rotation being enough to recover any loss of balance -- and sweeps the egg into her bionic palm.

A common test of prosthetic and robotic hardware is whether it can handle an egg without cracking, and her advanced KNUCKS system passes the test with flying colors -- moreso, as the spinning motion snatches the spoon out of mid-air as well, with only a faint *klink* of metal against metal.

"Can't forget this!" chirps Mint as she slows her spin, placing the egg upon the spoon. While her bionic left hand supports the spoon, she reaches her right hand out to the fallen staffer, assisting him back to his feet.

That task complete, she strides back to Mai and Alexis, none the worse for wear. "... Mad at her?" Minal flashes an ebullient smile, her painted combat boots squaring up with the starting line. "I'd take it as a -compliment- for being so good it takes two of us to even the odds..."

And then, -POW!- The starting gun fires, and Mai is off like a rocket.
"... Hey, she's getting away!"
Mint tilts forward, biting down on the long end of her spoon as she starts to give chase. She may not be nimble enough to leap onto a fencepost -- she's more like a bull in a china shop! And what's more, her KNUCKS system has a bit of an additional boost in the form of twin mini-jet engines -- both of which can be heard spinning up as she charges forward! The egg bobs back and forth upon her spoon as she soars forward, aiming a quick punch at Mai's foot, hoping to knock her off-balance!

She'd probably be hollering something, if not for the spoon in her mouth.

COMBATSYS: Mai successfully hits Alexis with Kachosen.
- Power hit! -

[ \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Mai              0/-------/-----==|-------\-------\0             Mint
[       \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|

[ALEXIS]
The sound of the blank being fired catches Alexis out - she's a fighter, not a foot racer, and by the time she realises what's going on Mai has already gained a bit of a headstart.

"H-hey! Slow down!"

While their choice of footwear may be similar, Alexis has little of the grace displayed by the ninja - when she starts to tear down the zig-zagging slope, her weight is all on the front of her feet, leaving much of the effort in advancing her toward the finish to gravity. A quick sucking motion pulls the spoon handle further into her mouth to make balancing the crucial egg easier.

Unfortunately, Alexis' tactic leaves her with little ability to divert her course as the fan comes flying at her legs. She raises one foot higher to try and step over the fan as it comes in - and in doing so, fails to account for the extra couple of inches of heel under her foot. Initially, it seems as though everything may be fine, but as the fan catches under her shoe, it causes her to misstep as her foot comes down, stumble, then tumble head over heels down the pavement.

"Fffff-!"

Her cursing is muffled as the spoon ends up further in her mouth, her exposed skin become marked by red scratches as she rolls down the hill. Somehow, in sheer defiance of gravity, the egg remains on the spoon.

Still, it's not the most disastrous incident where a fan came flying at Alexis' legs.

Hitting a hedge causes Alexis to bounce upward in a cloud of green leaves, her tumble slowing as she flies up into the air - the height of her arc effectively increasing due to the incline she's descending. She happens to be flying in Mai's direction as Mint comes in to try and knock the ninja off-balance, though, and Alexis twists in the air to try and maneuver so that she'll collide with bunny-Mai with some sense of intentionality. If she can manage to do so, she'll slip an arm around Mai's next to drop her rabbit-ears-first into the pavement, which would cause a sonic wave to blast through the area with a sound like a crunchy guitar chord for added power.

COMBATSYS: Mai blocks Mint's Light Punch.

[  \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Mai              0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0             Mint
[        \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/---====|

COMBATSYS: Mai dodges Alexis' Stage Dive EX.

[  \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Mai              0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0             Mint
[        \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/---====|

[MAI]
Mai stands, posed dramatically. At some point she's shifted the spoons back to in-between her fingers to speak, but now she's placing them back in her mouth. She handles the spoons deftly, the eggs spinning with a strange precision that makes them dance precariously atop the spoons, rolling to and fro. Before Mai can get repositioned to get moving again, however, Mint powers forward with a bunch to Mai's leg! She turns to brace for impact, but even with her guard up Mai can't maintain her precarious balance on the fence post!

"Aieee!" Alexis dives in, but as she does Mai rolls with her fall, kicking off with her other foot to get enough air to soar right over Alexis' head. Mai turns in the air, practically juggling the eggs with a flourish of spoons as she redirects herself, shifts her direction, and descends back toward Mint!

"Incoming!" is all Mai manages to say as Mint may suddenly see the white fluff of Mai's bunny tail and the flash of red ribbons tied around it descending toward her with dangerous momentum. Why dangerous? Because it also means Mai's threatening to land on Mint with her, well, sizeable backside!

COMBATSYS: Mint blocks Mai's Crushing Strike.

[  \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///////////////////////////   ]
Mai              0/-------/----===|==-----\-------\0             Mint
[        \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/---====|

[MINT]
As Mint's fist slams home, she takes the opportunity to smile -- which is good, because the impact was enough to shake the egg upon the spoon in her mouth. A muffled groan escapes her as she doubles backwards, struggling to balance the egg in place again. But now that Mai's been unsettled, Mint takes the opportunity to jog forward a little bit!

... And it's about then that the cameraman takes note of the -other- addition Mint's crew added to her attire -- a tiny bunny tail pinned to the back of her arctic camo pants. Mint may be the odd one out of the bunch: she's definitely not rocking the sort of curves that her two co-competitors are. The corporal has never been worried -too- much about how she looks, ridiculous or otherwise. It's pretty hard to embarass the Clifton native -- generally! ... But she's not embarassed, because she doesn't know that that Cameraman #6 was spending more time focusing on her bunny tail as she runs than on the attack driving in from Mai...

Luckily, the video feed was switched to another camera with a better view in time for Mai's warning. And Mint, herself... Well, it's a close judgment call, but her metal-clad forearms are a sight bigger than Mai's sizable backside. She raises her KNUCKS, and it will be like Mai taking a seat on a firm metal cylinder, aside from the part that a tiny Indian woman is attached!

Mint scrambles backwards to recover her momentum, eyes crossing as she focuses on the egg perilously rocking back and forth upon her spoon. "Mmmm!" she mmms back, unable to do any more without doubling over.

She may not be fully -embarassed- by Mai's unconventional attack vector, but it's still a dang awkward sight to see! With her vision focused upon the egg, the slightly-shaken Mint powers forward with a burst of speed from her rocket-powered KNUCKs, firing off a balanced one-two punch aimed at sending Mai careening towards Alexis!

COMBATSYS: Mai blocks Mint's Rapid Combo.

[   \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///////////////////////////   ]
Mai              0/-------/---====|==-----\-------\0             Mint
[        \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/---====|

[ALEXIS]
The fact that Mai is able to jump over her attempted collision results in Alexis instead belly-flopping onto the asphalt with a blast of sound before hurtling into a log roll, the fluffy bikini and tail providing little cushioning from the impact.

"Urgghh!"

She manages to get her hands under her after a few revolutions, the spoon still perched between her teeth and the egg still miraculously - perhaps even impossibly - nesting atop it as she ends up on her hands and knees only momentarily before forcing herself onward. A sidelong glance from her aquamarine eyes tells her that she's almost keeping up on momentum alone - at the expense of her own body, though that's a sacrifice all too familiar to the punk bunny. As the group is approaching another switchback, she decides to take a shortcut, hopping a hedge to hit a set of stairs, then sliding down the rail alongside it in a manner that her heels render all too unsteady. She lunges off the rail to a fast-approaching streetlight as Mint attempts to send Mai in her direction, peripheral vision giving her the sense that she may be able to follow up. Grabbing the streetlight with both hands, she swings around sideways. A dual-toned hum fills the air as the rocker draws her knees up to her chest before thrusting both legs to full extension in an attempt to hit Mai with a double heel kick that would release a double note of sonic energy if it connects! Her face is a mask of determination as her lips purse around the spoon's handle.

It looks pretty silly, honestly.

COMBATSYS: Mai full-parries Alexis' The Windmill!!

[   \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///////////////////////////   ]
Mai              0/-------/-======|==-----\-------\0             Mint
[        \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/----===|

[MAI]
For a moment, Mai is perched awkwardly, sitting atop Mint's mechanical fist. When the smaller Indian woman doesn't get laid flat out by Mai's unorthodox maneuver, the kunoichi looks down over her shoulder with a mixture of confusion and annoyance. Before she can respond, however, Mint has launched her into the air for a one-two punch! Mai pivots with superhuman agility, spinning to assume a forearm block that takes the bone-rattling impact and still sends Mai flying backward toward Alexis.

The eggs rattle dangerously and start to lift off the spoons before Mai transitions into a spin that uses the centrifugal force to hold them in place. As she goes, Mai sees Alexis' own spin and the wind up kick. Airborne and off balance, how will Mai respond?

What happens next is a blur of motion. Mai shifts and turns, clashing against the cacophonous double-kick with a flourish a steel fan. The fan crumples on impact, but it's sacrifice gives Mai a chance to use the sudden stop to turn a front flip--right as her fluffy tail and ribbons ignite with fiery chi!

"Ryuuenbu!!"

But what happened to the eggs?!

[MINT]
The spoon in Mint's mouth shudders with the impact of two punches thudding into Mai's considerable defenses -- and it's then that the wide-eyed Marine realizes just how strong the kunoichi actually -is-. Those wide eyes have to focus on the egg, for the moment, though, to keep it from tipping off the spoon like it wants to. With a hiss, she scrambles off to the side, wrapping one of her comically oversized hands around the egg to ensure the shell doesn't shatter!

Mint has reached the point where the street stops zigging and starts zagging. Plus, she's... lagging behind a little bit, as all her little exchange seems to have done is propel the Shiranui-ryuu ninjette further ahead. Her fingers wiggle, and a small series of nigh-inaudible tones signals the input of a command sequence.

The rocket engines at the back of her arms flares a brilliant ruby red, as Mint starts barreling forward into a leap. She leaves the ground, shadowing Alexis' shortcut from before -- but this time, she's powered by her custom prosthetics. Her flight is literally rocket-powered. And though she is biting down on the spoon, her mouth flares open on either side of said spoon with a loud "MMMM-RAH!"
It's supposed to be "oo-rah," but... yeah.

Both of her metal fists retract backwards into her wrists -- a windup as she brings her fists overhead. She's basically hang-gliding for a moment, catching some sick air. But the engines decrease their power as she approaches Mai, allowing her to bring her fists down from overhead -- and that's when the fists hiss with a pneumatic pop, slinging further momentum downward. It'll be... a considerable impact, aimed at taking some of the wind out of her kunoichi opponent's sails!

COMBATSYS: Mai successfully hits Alexis with Ryuuenbu EX.

[   \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////    ]
Mai              1/-------/=======|=------\-------\0             Mint
[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/----===/=======|

[ALEXIS]
The steel fan proves to be little obstruction against Alexis' feet, given the momentum with which she's swinging around the lightpost. This proves to be to the punk rocker's detriment, though - instead of having her revolution arrested, she gains speed and swings fully around the post a second time. Perhaps somewhat impressive is her ability to keep parallel to the ground and keep her grip on the post as she goes for another whirl - but she doesn't have the actual control to keep from crashing full on into Mai's retaliatory assault. The vertically spinning ninja wins out over the horizontally spinning punk fighter, thanks in no small part to the fiery blaze accompanying Mai's attack.

Alexis' spoon goes flying end over end as she's engulfed in the flames, and the Canadian loses her grip on the pole as she reflexively slaps at her own person to snuff the fire from catching on her fuzzy attire. She ends up rolling around on the ground, managing to execute the oft-cited emergency response to being on fire more through chance than by recalling safety lessons.

"Ow! Mother fu-"

The fact that she's able to speak clearly abruptly clues Alexis into the corollating fact that she's lost her spoon. "Shit!"

Pushing quickly up onto her knees, Lexi looks around to spot her spoon-and-egg combo still twirling in the air, just starting to descend not too far away. She scrambles and dives forward, stretching her arms out to position her hands to catch the spoon and egg as they fall. Her face scrunches in pain - the fuzzy bikini top, as the only protection for her belly slide on the asphalt, is rather inadequate - but manages, just barely, to snatch the spoon's handle before it hits the ground.

Somehow, the egg is still sitting on the spoon.

Upside down.

Lexi quickly turns the spoon upright as she pushes up to her feet. "Ugh! Why is it always fire?!"

Alexis whirls around toward Mai, and in doing so notices that there's a garbage can beside her own feet, overturned in her own tumbling. "Hey! Eat this!" she yells challengingly, before booting the can hard at the ninja. A satisfying *CLANG* rings out as the can sails into the air, a trail of napkins, soda cans and a half-empty box of Rice-a-Roni following in its wake as it bounces along the road toward the red-clad bunnygirl ninja.

Alexis starts to smirk at the air she's managed to give the garbage, till she suddenly notices the throbbing in her toes and looks down at her pointy high-heels. Her face twists in pain and aggravation. "Son of a-"

COMBATSYS: Mai blocks Mint's BFH.

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////    ]
Mai              1/-------/=======|==-----\-------\0             Mint
[               \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/----===/=======|

COMBATSYS: Mai full-parries Alexis' Large Thrown Object!!

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////    ]
Mai              1/----===/=======|==-----\-------\0             Mint
[               \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/----===/=======|

[MAI]
Mai continues her vertical spin even after she collides with Alexis, letting her flames snuff themselves out before she makes a three-point landing. The camera gets a great shot of Mai's smoking bunny tail, but for reasons other than that. With a bounce, she reaches back into her cleavage, producing both eggs and spoons once more, then places the long ends back in her mouth. Mai works her arm briefly, still dealing with soreness from Mint's first blow. Unfortunately, she can't dwell on it with Mint rapidly accelerating down toward her!

"Mmrph!" Mai protests through clenched teeth and two spoons. She adjusts her top and pulls out /two/ fans this time. She brings the pair up and crosses them over in the center, absorbing the impact with a tremendous impact. The fans crumple again, but this time the pavement also cracks under Mai's feet, her knees popping as she almost buckles! That sounded like it hurt, even if Mai took it like a trooper.

But shortly thereafter, a trash can gets launched at her from behind while she's still blocking Mint! Mai glances over her shoulder, shifts slightly, then thrusts backward. With a well-aimed butt bump, Mai deflects the trash can with a clang!

Then the kunoichi is moving again. She flips forward, aiming to catch Mint between her ankles before the cyborg can recover. If she gets a lock, Mai swings her back down in a powerful leg toss!

COMBATSYS: Mint endures Mai's Fuusha Kuzushi EX.

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              1/--=====/=======|======-\-------\0             Mint
[               \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/----===/=======|

[MINT]
Mint is just kind of staring at the way Mai is able to take her axehandle blow without completely buckling under the pressure -- it's pretty darn impressive! But moreover than that, the -manner- in which Mai deals with her attacks is... disconcerting to her, to say the least.

The spoon is plucked out of her mouth as she jogs sideways to give some additional clearance. As she balances the egg upon her spoon, she quips with a mild New Jersey accent, "Ya got a whole arsenal in there, what gives?" The corporal hops backwards with a bewildered look in her eyes, her finger servoes working overtime to keep the egg balanced. She passes a quick glance over to how her teammate is faring..."

And that's when she realizes -- the egg is upside down. And not leaving the spoon.
"Dammit, wish'd I'd thought'a that..."

Shaking her head, she starts to race forward again, just about the time that Mai -should- be decked with a trash can. Another complex chord of finger commands is input as she runs, and the flames from her arms begin to roar. "Well, let's just kick things up a notch, eh?" she says with a smirk, tucking that spoon back into her mouth.

Mint rockets forward, faster even than the last time. As before, the fists click backwards, sinking into the wrist joints. She can't stop running now -- each stride clears well over three meters in length -- and she =won't= stop running.

So Mai trying to =stop= her...? That's... well, it'll work a bit differently than in Minal's head, at the very least.
"Mmh, mmmhhh!" is the warning she attempts to give, though the egg vibrating at the tip of her spoon keeps some of her focus...

Snag -- ankles lock around Mint as she hurtles forward.
Alley-oop -- Mint tumbles forward, propelled forward entirely by the thrust of her KNUCKS' jet turbines.

CRACK -- The back of Mint's cranial clacks against the pavement, as she is completely inverted when she hits. Her shoulderblades hit an instant afterwards, and her entire body should totally follow after that...

But while the capacities of a human body are totally accounted for by Shiranui-ryuu ninjutsu, the capacities of bespoke engineered weaponry are probably not in the list of fundamentals. Mint's hands have electronic minds of their own -- integrated circuitry that is able to compensate for the revolution of its wearers just as quickly as it's happening. And the precision tuning of the jet engines allows them to thrust forward, with an attempt to impact twice as fast as any plain old human can muster. Such it is that while Mint is falling, flailing, and otherwise completely at Mai's mercy, her -fists- are moving to take advantage of the close proximity. Her right fist unchambers itself, pneumatics slamming upwards into Shiranui's abdomen. And as soon as Mint's hips hits the street, both of her metal forearms find themselves perpendicular to the pavement.

In other words: Mint's grasping hands will reach out for Mai's legs. If she manages the hold, she will blast upwards with maximum thrust. The tight grip of the metal hands will hurt -- but not as much as flying chaotically into one of the many Lombard St trees decorated for the Easter holiday!

Somehow... the egg just keeps bouncing around between Mint's forehead and some other part of her body. It'd be pretty impressive if she had been doing it on purpose, but with that tumble... whoa.

COMBATSYS: Mint blitzes into action and acts again!

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              1/--=====/=======|======-\-------\0             Mint
[               \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/----===/=======|

[ALEXIS]
After hopping on one foot for a few seconds, hands holding the other - not because she's attempting to roleplay her cosplay, mind - Alexis plops down on her backside on the pavement, unable to maintain her balance with any sense of grace any longer on a single high heeled shoe. Grunting, she sticks her spoon between her teeth and uses both hands to wrench the shoe off the foot she used to kick the can, then switches to the other foot, removing that shoe as well. Her attention turns to the entanglement between Mai and Mint, head tilting to one side as her can bounces off of Mai's... well...

"Huh. She's not bad," she mutters under her breath after plucking the spoon back out of her mouth. She pushes up to her feet as she turns her gaze from the other two bunny-girls to the path down the road. It would be easy enough to let the Marine and ninja fight it out while she aims for a victory for Team Mintlexis - that'd technically be teamwork, right?

She tucks the spoon-and-egg behind her back - given that gravity clearly isn't a problem, the bunny tail provides the best protection for the Canadegg - and breaks into a run straight down the street. As she does, she reaches down to her waist, and hits a button on a previously undescribed mini-music player hooked to her bikini.

"Keep her distracted, eh?" she calls with a thumb up to Mint as music starts blaring from hidden speakers on Alexis' person.

o/~ CAN'T STOP ME NOOOOW

LIGHTS OUT KICKIN' AND SCREAMIN' o/~

The music grows louder as Alexis goes, the sound shaped and given force by the punk rocker's command of sonic energy.

COMBATSYS: Alexis surges with the power of rock!

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              1/--=====/=======|======-\-------\0             Mint
[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/=======/=======|

COMBATSYS: Mai blocks Mint's Body Blow.

[       \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              1/-======/=======|======-\-------\0             Mint
[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/=======/=======|

COMBATSYS: Mint successfully hits Mai with Violent Clinching.
Glancing Blow

[         \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              1/=======/=======|=======\-------\0             Mint
[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/=======/=======|

[MAI]
Mai maintains her leg lock on Mint briefly. The length of her legs frequently makes Fuusha Kuzushi one of her best holds--it can get a secure ankle lock and set someone up for further punishment. In this case, however, she's not expecting Mint's automated counterattack until it's too late to do much about it. Mai goes for a block once more, discarding her damaged fans as she rolls in the street. She braces and goes for an open palm block this time, but even then Mint's fist hits her with such force that it knocks the wind right out of her and causes her to spit out the spoons. (They land, well-cushioned, on Mai's bosom.) Her butt slides across the pavement as she reels from the impact, before she can get away, Mint's grabbed her by the legs to counter!

Mai's hurled end-over-end, spiraling through the air toward one of the nearest trees. The spoons fall through the air, but Mai hurried grabs them and shoves them back into her top. As she turns to right herself--she's soon distracted by Alexis' sudden singing. Mai turns to look for a moment, which is just a little too long. She smacks into the tree at full force with a heavy thwump. She drops into the brush afterward, disappearing into the leaves.

But suddenly, Mai erupts from three once more, now wreathed in flame. She hurtles straight toward Alexis like a ninja meteor, threatening to smash her into the pavement! ---along the way Mai also takes out the top of one of the hedgerows...

COMBATSYS: Alexis blocks Mai's Suichou no Mai.

[         \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              0/-------/-======|=======\-------\0             Mint
[               \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           2/<<<<<<</<<<<<<<|

[MINT]
Mint is more than a little dazed from being slammed into the pavement. Some people may go their entire life without knowing whether they've left their mark on society, but not Mint -- there is now a Minal-shaped crater left behind on Lombard Street for some poor sap to pave over.

But as tough an impact as she's taken, the Marine's got a tendency to snap back. She'd lost (most of) her hands in Afghanistan, and she has a bionic knee as well (not that anyone would know, since she's not wearing what Mai or Alexis are), and... well, she just likes to get back into the thick of things! And while she might like to just lie there a bit longer, the sight of the egg starting to drop away demands her immediate attention.

"No ya don't!" she insists, plucking the egg out of midair with one hand, and catching the spoon with another. With the primary stores of jet fuel expended, she'll have to catch up on this foot race the hard way -- running!

Tucking the egg and spoon back into place, she starts to catch up with the two at military jogging speed -- lucky for her she's been keeping up with her physical training regimen. She stares in awe at the flames and music, somehow thinking they were both special effects n Alexis' part. She just -set Mai on fire!- That's =so awesome!= But while Alexis has her attention...

Okay, Mint... how are we going to beat this ninja? She's just =so fast=...
And in the midst of her running, with the egg bobbing up and down just inches ahead of her nose, she sees it.
An opportunity...?!

COMBATSYS: Mint focuses on her next action.

[         \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              0/-------/-======|=======\-------\0             Mint
[               \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           2/<<<<<<</<<<<<<<|

[ALEXIS]
The music blaring from Alexis' sound system is loud enough that she doesn't notice the sound as Mai flies into the hedges off to one side of her. Either that, or Mai just managed to be too ninja to be heard. In any case, it's not until she rounds the switchback and Mai explodes out of the foliage from overhead like a burning pinwheel that Alexis actually registers the kunoichi's attack vector.

"Holy frig!"

It's all that Alexis can manage to get her hands up and catch onto Mai - resulting in the pair tumbling down the road, Alexis serving as the tread to Mai's tire as she's scorched by the blazing Shiranui ninja's flames. "AHHHHH!"

Wearing a furry white swimsuit to fight a flame-wielding ninja might have been an oversight on Alexis' part - by the time they've made it halfway to the next switchback, the originally white bikini is black and even less modest in its coverage than before.

Straining to avoid getting crushed or incinerated, Alexis tries to establish some sense of dominance in the grapple. She's trying to grab hold of Mai's bunny ears and pull her head down between Alexis' legs; if she can manage to do that, she'll then try and hook her arms under Mai's arms and her ankles behind Mai's knees to take control, stop their spinning and drive Mai's face into the street with her backside. Given their current momentum, they'd probably bounce off the asphalt a time or two before they stop...

COMBATSYS: Mai dodges Alexis' Drop D.

[         \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ////////////////////          ]
Mai              0/-------/=======|=======\-------\0             Mint
[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           1/----<<</<<<<<<<|

[MAI]
The collision with Alexis leads to a rolling fireball of kunoichi and rockstar tumbling down the hill. They likely jump at least one turn in the tumble, carried fully by the momentum of their fight. Mai's own bunny suit is a bit ragged, and she seems to have lost her heels at some point, but she keeps going. The two are basically a blurr of motion as they roll down the hill, but then Alexis grabs hold of Mai's bunny ears and tugs, dragging her down.

Mai struggles against Alexis' grapple as she almost gets pulled into Alexis' signature Drop D. While she doesn't know Alexis' style enough to recognize it, Mai can tell she doesn't want to get caught in it--that much is clear. As such, she starts working her hands in ninja signs as she struggles against Alexis's grapple.

"Kagerou no Mai!" she exclaims before a pillar of fire erupts underneath them both, threatening to launch them once again into the air--and more importantly for Mai, separate them from where Alexis has the edge in a grapple.

[MINT]
Mint's bunny ears and tail may be a little wrinkled, a little tussled. It's her upper jacket that is the most wrecked: the brightly colored panels are now flecked with pieces of gravel and asphalt. But at least they're not on =fire!= Gosh, was that all Alexis' doing? ... Further observation demonstrates that Alexis is getting burned, and thus, that was probably -not- her doing. Her muffled lament: "Mmmmrgh, mmmeeez...."

Above all, though, the mission -- carry that egg as far down Lombard Street as possible! And also, keep a close eye on Mai and Alexis as the vixens fire-walk with one another...

But, what's that? Opportunity? Ah yes -- =opportunity=. This is when Mint realizes the perfect moment to strike. Mai and Alexis might not notice the small brick boundary wall they are brawling near, but Mint sure does. She breaks into a rapid dash, and -- mindful of the egg bobbing about in her spoon -- leaps into the fray once again!

... But not with her fists.

With her bionic knee.
She aims to plant it right into Mai's back, conflagration be damned.

And =then=, if she manages to connect, she'll grab hold of Mai's shoulder with her left hand and piston her shoulder blade with the other!

Again, she'd shout something, but she's too busy aiming her cross-eyed focus on that blasted egg!

COMBATSYS: Alexis Toughs Out Mai's Kagerou no Mai!

[         \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////            ]
Mai              0/-------/-----==|=======\-------\0             Mint
[                      \\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           2/<<<<<<</<<<<<<<|

[ALEXIS]
The elusive Mai remains slippery as ever, once more managing to escape Alexis' attempt at smashing the ninja. The experience is a new sort of frustration for the Canadian punk rocker - she's been outmatched before in a number of ways, whether it be toughness, physical might, command of chi, or alacrity. But there's one thing that Alexis has always been confident in her ability to outclass any opponent in, a metaphorical weapon she's always wielded as if it were second nature, something that no opponent has challenged her in (at least, as far as her ego is concerned), until now...

Fanservice.

It's not the fact that Mai is beating her in every relevant category of combat prowess that's frustrating Alexis, it's the fact that she can't help but think Mai looks better than her doing it. Especially since they're wearing nearly the same outfit. Did she even ditch her shoes like Alexis had?

It's this thought that's making Alexis scowl in the moments before the inferno erupts underneath her.

"Fuuuuu-!!"

As she and Mai are both blasted into the air, Alexis ends up flailing her arms and legs, the extinguishing flames leaving a star-shaped trail of smoke and ash in the air behind her as she's sent practically sky-high. From her aerial vantage, her eyes search for the ninja. Envy boiling in her veins as she realises that Mai managed to escape the situation unscathed, Alexis narrows her eyes and dips her body into a dive.

o/~ READY STEADY CAN'T HOLD ME BACK o/~

Alexis' entire form hums with potential sonic power as she hurtles through the air, gravity bolstering her speed as she aims herself toward the ninja. Her body is covered in singe marks, but through sheer force of will, she's still in the fight - and still about to attempt something potentially very ill-advised.

If she can manage to aim herself as she intends, she'll hurtle like a human javelin straight into Mai, spearing her out of the air and driving her onto the street, ending up on top of the ninja in a mounted position. From there, she'd start kneeboarding down the switchback on top of Mai, heedless of the hedgery they'd be smashing through as she threw punch after punch at the red-clad ninja's face, each blow laden with sonic energy.

COMBATSYS: Mai blocks Mint's Lock and Load.

[            \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////            ]
Mai              0/-------/---====|=======\-------\1             Mint
[                       \\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/--<<<<<|

COMBATSYS: Mai fails to interrupt Beatdown in Three Four EX from Alexis with Musasabi no Mai EX.

[                     \\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////            ]
Mai              1/-------/=======|=======\-------\1             Mint
[                       \\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/--<<<<<|

[MAI]
It takes a moment for the flames to dissipate around Mai, her fiery chi forming a practical pillar of fire to keep her opponents at bay temporarily. To her credit, Mai's mastery of her chi is pretty impressive. Like everything else about Mai, it's flashy and perhaps a little gratuitous. It puts on an impressive display which, while not ideal for a stealthy ninja, does a perfect job of being distracting. Perhaps this is Mai's true intent with all that she does?

There's no time to ponder such mysteries, however, as suddenly Mint has powered over the wall, grabbed onto Mai's shoulder, and planted a bionic knee firmly against her back. There's a heavy 'thump' of muscle against muscle as an uncomfortable pop as Mint may have very well have dislocated something of Mai's. despite the ninja's best attempts at a shoulder block. Whatever the case, it sends Mai tumbling forward with a gasp, leading her to faceplant into the pavement and roll end over end down the hill.

In the next moment Mai is scrambling to check if her eggs is okay. She's in the process of getting her footing again when Alexis rockets down like a bird of prey, which in turn prompts Mai to go on the counterattack. She springs forward and vaults into the air, looking to collide with Alexis in an interception!

The reality, however, is the Mai entirely underestimates Alexis' speed. She's mid-leap when Alexis has already slammed into her midsection, possibly getting an uncomfortable face-full of cleavage depending on her direction of contact. (It's also one which is horribly timed considering Alexis' inner conflicts at the moment.)

Mai wheezes as the wind is knocked out of her, after which she slams hard against the pavement. Before she can position herself to defend Alexis is wailing on her with sonic-enhanced fists, kneeing and punching the kunoichi with the fury of a mosh pit gone wrong! The two of them slide down the hill as the go, adding further insult to injury as they crash through a hedge.

[MINT]
Mint grew up as a minority on the streets of northern New Jersey, so she's got some street smarts. Alexis' jealousy towards Mai might be registered on some subconscious level, but it never really bubbles to the surface in the midst of this downhill egg race / martial arts combat. She's got more important things to worry about, like making sure that her egg isn't lost in the process of slamming against Mai! The Marine recovers from her roll by helicoptering to her side, gyroscopically stabilizing herself in a graceful arc back to the ground, even as Mai is leaping back to her feet. As the collision with Alexis takes place, Corporal Panesh's boots have already hit the ground -- and she's off and running!

Eyes cross at the egg bobbing about on her spoon as she dashes down Lombard Street. By bringing her fists close to her, she can reduce her aerodynamic cross-section and run faster than before. Mint's diminutive figure lends itself towards a more comfortable run speed, allowing her to round the corner normally without needing to jump around.

Unfortunately, her hopes for a relaxed jog down the hill are dashed when Mai and Alexis... crash through the hedge just ahead of her!

"Mmmrgh!" she cries, hopping sideways in alarm! But she misinterprets the slide as a -really- unconventional attack -- and as soon as she regains her balance, she charges forward! A quick jab from the left is fired off, followed by a right cross punch. The one-two opener would be followed by wild left hook, intended to clobber the Shiranui-ryuu ninja back into the bush she'd just sprouted from! "Mmmmrah!" Nothing personal -- but this is egg racing!

[ALEXIS]
The unintentional faceful of Mai has Alexis seeing red - then again, that's pretty much a given considering the colour of Mai's outfit. It's uncertain whether the flush in her cheeks as she ends up straddling Mai is from anger or 'other' reasons- maybe a bit of both? - but it matters little as the violence rains down on the ninja. Her shouting is punctuated (or punchuated) between each word with another sonic blow.

"NO! BODY! OUT! SEXY! BUNNIES! ME! AND! WINS! DAMMIT!"

*BWIP BWIP BWOOP BWIP*

The pair are parted by a bump in the ground that bounces Alexis off of Mai, sending her tumbling alongside the ninja and giving Mint the opening for her assault.

Alexis is nothing if not spiteful, though. She lunges at the kunoichi without even making it back fully upright, aiming to either catch her as Mint knocks her back or otherwise slip behind her. If she can manage, she'll wrap her legs around Mai's waist while slipping her arms around Mai's head and collar in a classic sleeper hold before pulling tight. "Keep going! I'll keep her here!" she yells at Mint.

COMBATSYS: Mint successfully hits Mai with Knuckle Dragger.

[                         \\\\\  < >  /////////////////             ]
Mai              1/-----==/=======|=======\=------\1             Mint
[                      \\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|

COMBATSYS: Alexis successfully hits Mai with Power Throw.

[                             \  < >  /////////////////             ]
Mai              1/---====/=======|=======\=------\1             Mint
[                      \\\\\\\\  <
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|

[MAI]
"What?" Mai asks, genuinely confused. "This wasn't supposed to be a costume contest too, was it?!" Whether Mai doesn't actually know or whether she's being particularly sly is difficult to tell. At the same time, it's also difficult for to talk between getting the sonic bursts and the whole routine of getting punched in the face. When they hit a bump and separate, Mai is trying to right herself--and also check her cleavage to make sure the eggs have survived the chaos. Unfortunately for Mai, this puts her in a bad position when Mint powers up behind her and delivers a three punch combo. Between the flurry of blows that from Alexis that has the kunoichi's head ringing (and her lip bleeding) and Mint's well-timed combination, Mai's nearly knocked clean out by the left hook! She stumbles forward, flops heavily onto her chest, and tries to scramble to get back up again.
%And before she can, Alexis lands on top of her with a sleeper-hold. "Ugh..." Mai pants, "Does everyone here hit this hard??" Thump. Mai flops over, out like a light. Her ears droop almost comically.

Additionally, if Alexis looks carefully, she may notice egg yolk running out of Mai's top. This is the downside of her storage method when she falls forward, apparently.

COMBATSYS: Mai takes no action.

[                      \\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////             ]
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|=======\=------\1             Mint

COMBATSYS: Mai can no longer fight.

[                      \\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////             ]
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|=======\=------\1             Mint

[MINT]
Corporal Panesh has had people upset at her for using what could be considered 'lethal weapons' in the middle of a fight. The truth be told though, she was a great boxer -before- she lost use of her hands due to an IED in Afghanistan. The Marine would be punching hard regardless of whether metal was attached or not. The saving grace here is that, of course, Mint isn't trying to -kill- anyone here -- just keep the swift kunoichi from beating her and Alexis to the finish line!

As for the fight, though -- Mint grits her teeth at the sound. Which has the unfortunate side effect of making her front teeth hurt -even more- from forgetting that the spoon was there. "Mmow, mmow!" she chirps out of the corner of her mouth, as one hand snaps up to grab the spoon and egg out of her mouth. As she hops backwards, she quirks her head to one side, glancing back and forth between Alexis and Mai. She went from yelling about out-sexy-bunnying to... caring? Somehow?

"Roger that," is her quick reply. Alexis may not be a commanding officer, but she -is- going to look after Mai.
She hopes!

And with that brief confirmation, Mint takes off jogging down the zig-zagging hills of Lombard Street, toting the egg and its spoon in one hand. Her injured backside may be screaming for her to slow down and take a breather, but determination will see the bunny-ear and bushy-tailed adorned Marine through to the race's conclusion...

COMBATSYS: Mint takes no action.

[                      \\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////             ]
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|=======\=------\1             Mint

[ALEXIS]
With Mai firmly trapped in her grip, Alexis rolls over crocodile-style onto her back, ensuring that the kunoichi won't be able to use the ground for leverage in any escape attempt. It's probably more than what's needed, considering that Mai is practically out even before Lexi can manage to lock in the sleeper hold - leaving the Canadian with her fellow bunnygirl's slumbering weight on top of her.

Slowly, the realization dawns on Alexis that it's been a really long time since she had a hug.

It's awkward timing, but considering that she's spent the last few months literally fighting for her life - and failing, at one point - the sensation is rather profound. All the anger from seconds before seems to escape at once. Alexis' lips quirk as she lifts her head to check on Mint's progress, before returning her attention to Mai.

"So, uhh, nice costume, eh?" Alexis settles back - followed by a popping sound from underneath her, causing her eyes to go wide. Except, it's not quite the sound you'd expect from an egg cracking. It's more like the sound of plastic snapping under pressure.

"Ah, crap."

COMBATSYS: Alexis takes no action.

[                      \\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////             ]
Alexis           0/-------/--=====|=======\=------\1             Mint

[MINT]
Far far down Lombard Street, Mint is hurtling towards the finish line! It's twenty feet away now... fifteen... ten! Mint pumps one arm high in the sky while the other egg jostles about in the spoon. It's ... it may be the first race she's ever won!

And as Mint snaps the ribbon that constitutes the finish line, the cheering is... subdued? She whirls around, and comes to a startling realization...
There's only one camera with a solitary red light pointed towards her. Only one camera is capturing the moment.
All the others are focused on Alexis "hugging" Mai.

Mint lifts the egg to the sole camera with a wry smirk. "Well, that's a wrap! Hope you all enjoyed the show!"

Log created on 14:26:45 04/08/2017 by Alexis, and last modified on 00:58:05 04/10/2017.