Description: After Honoka's raid on the Diet--and the subsequent battle that got Sakura hospitalized--Honoka seeks out her friend to... talk.
The facilities at Sumitomo Hospital are... stressed, to say the least. It's been a hectic time, and even more recent events have not done anything to fix that. Despite all that, Sakura hasn't been released from the hospital yet, though she's certainly stumped for it; the truth is, she's still confined to a wheelchair, still prone to bouts of weakness, though her youth and her natural healing ability are both mitigating factors in this.
Still, the doctors have insisted--at least two or three more days. It's frustrating, but, privately, Sakura has to admit--she's never been hurt *this* bad before. If she were to dwell on it.. it might affect her adversely mentally. So to avoid that she's gone up to the rooftop.
It's perhaps the one place that is the most peaceful in the hospital, on account of storing people outside when disasters are actively occurring is bad medicine. Sakura wheels herself out there, out to the fence that protects the edge of the building, and leans her head back, staring up into the sky.
For Honoka, the first terrible thing, from which everything else sprung, happened eight years ago in a little fishing village on the eastern end of Hokkaido. And from that night on, nothing was the same. She's been living out a nightmare, punctuated only occasionally by moments of fancy and freedom. And this week... this week that was supposed to be the most glorious of all... perhaps has been the most tragic.
Honoka's not been able to sleep. Not knowing that just next door to the hospital are nearly eight hundred people. Trapped, confused, terrified. And it's all her fault.
Originally, she came here with every intent of visiting Sakura. She'd put on a dark coat, and sunglasses, and said she had to visit a cousin. Lying is a hard habit to break. But when she passed the room and Sakura was awake, she'd lost her nerve and come up here to the rooftop to think. When she'd heard the elevator doors whoosh open... Honoka had hidden herself, kept herself from view. Once she'd heard the wheelchair roll out... she had a pretty good guess who had come up here.
The soul-searching took a few minutes. The doubts, the insecurities... she had to bury them before she could stand and face Sakura. The toughest part of her battle just a day and a half prior. Wiping her sleeve across her face, she draws in a deep breath as she rises to her feet, and walks over to Sakura.
"The... sky is nicer here. Easier to breathe, they tell me." Honoka rests her elbows on the fence, as she looks up to the sky -- possibly the same clouds Sakura is. "How much longer have you got here... Sakura?"
She needs a moment, before she can face her, after all.
The surprised reaction is muted in Sakura, primarily due to her confinement. She's still swaddled in bandages, her chest wrapped almost suffocatingly tight. But it means she can't move the way she wants. She'll have a lot of work to work herself back into shape--to regain her fighting spirit and her fighting ability.
So the surprise she feels doesn't translate as much into movement--a widening of the eyes, a twitch that is most visible in the shoulders. Her voice betrays the emotion more, a waver in it that evens out quickly. "It's less crowded up here... the hospital is a madhouse. They're treating everyone that comes in..." There's only a trace of censure in her voice; she might not even be aware of it herself.
"The doctors say I can leave in two days at the best. I need to get out... I need to..." She considers her words for a moment.
"I need to train again." She doesn't say why--she suspects Honoka will know why.
here's no need for Honoka to see Sakura move to sense her surprise. For one, there's the sudden shift in her breathing, the telltale signs of an interruption. For another... Honoka has no need to hide her psychic abilities from Sakura. Not any more.
The censure is evident. In fact... if Sakura had applied any more, or if Honoka had simply turned to face the young woman who had stood by her side against Mukai... it's quite possible Honoka would crack. The vessel simply cannot sustain any more pressure. It's a good long moment before she responds -- a long, drawn-in breath, the caress of fresh air upon her nostrils several times more intoxicating than any carcinogenic tobacco product could hope to be, at this moment.r
"Two days, mm." Where will Honoka be in two days? Truth be told, she's got no idea. Southtown, or maybe Yokohama. Maybe even to the Grand Ise Shrine, who knows?
The temptation to reach for her yo-yo is strong, but she resists for now, empowered by the fresh air placebo. She finds the strength to turn her brown eyes to those of her friend. "I know you don't want to believe me -- I wouldn't. But... I... I got in too deep, Sakura."
"Mom and Dad are already preparing to get me back home... even Tsukushi is worried." That's probably an understatement, but Sakura has no way of knowing that. There were probably arguments between her mother and her father. About getting their daughter to stop this damn foolish thing she does. Tsukushi pointing out that Sakura would never stop, ever. And so on. The deep breath from Honoka is matched by one from Sakura--as deep as she can make it, at least.
Sakura meets Honoka's brown eyes with her own, her gaze steady. "I shouldn't believe you. You had your men shoot me... you incited people to riot." Sakura wheels herself backwards a couple of feet and turns her chair, facing Honoka directly, then lifts her hands, resting them on the armrests as she regards the diaboloist.
"And now you're the Empress of this land..." She can't bring herself to say 'Ezo'. In too deep? Almost certainly that's true.
"If that's so... what are you going to do to get out of it?" Even as the words are leaving her lips, Sakura is wondering... is there anything Honoka -can- do to get herself out of this? Or is this an inescapable trap now?
Home. There is no 'home' for Honoka -- she burned those bridges the moment she burned the orphanage. She's jealous, in a way, of folks like Sakura -- people who have a mother and father. People who have a brother. Every happy family that ever walked into the circus... hurt her, in some miniscule way. And hearing about the actual concern that actual families have for their actual children -- not just audience members who may come and go -- hurts.
No, Sakura has no illusions about the young terrorist any more. She's seen the real Honoka, the selfish woman, the insecure child lashing out at an unfair world. "Empresses and Emperors are remarkably trustworthy, in general," she notes, the trace of humor only lightly evident in her voice, and not matched at all in her guarded expression.
Honoka kneels down in front of Sakura's wheelchair, no longer wanting her eye level to be over Sakura's. They are... were? ... equals once. "And... I haven't figured that out yet. Not... entirely. But I just... I don't accept fate. I don't want the future that man showed us. I want a brighter one."
It's difficult to consider brightness, with the sound of heavy machinery sifting through the demolished ruins of the building next door.
"I still think of the man. Every day, Sakura. The disappointment. And it makes me furious."
Adding, one line I forgot.
"And I traded that dark... figure... for someone even darker, I'm afraid."
Home. There is no 'home' for Honoka -- she burned those bridges the moment she burned the orphanage. She's jealous, in a way, of folks like Sakura -- people who have a mother and father. People who have a brother. Every happy family that ever walked into the circus... hurt her, in some miniscule way. And hearing about the actual concern that actual families have for their actual children -- not just audience members who may come and go -- hurts.
No, Sakura has no illusions about the young terrorist any more. She's seen the real Honoka, the selfish woman, the insecure child lashing out at an unfair world. "Empresses and Emperors are remarkably trustworthy, in general," she notes, the trace of humor only lightly evident in her voice, and not matched at all in her guarded expression.
Honoka kneels down in front of Sakura's wheelchair, no longer wanting her eye level to be over Sakura's. They are... were? ... equals once. "And... I haven't figured that out yet. Not... entirely. But I just... I don't accept fate. I don't want the future that man showed us. I want a brighter one."
It's difficult to consider brightness, with the sound of heavy machinery sifting through the demolished ruins of the building next door.
"I still think of the man with the dark skin. Every day, Sakura. The disappointment. And it makes me furious. And I traded that dark... figure... for someone even darker, I'm afraid."
Sakura straightens her head, which, admittedly, takes strain off her neck, and meets Honoka's gaze. Sakura's taken some serious defeats recently--so she understands what Honoka means when she says she thinks about that dark man. "I..." Pause.
"... I understand. A little. You know I can't... won't... support you in what you're doing now." That is, the conquest of Japan. But maybe some good can come of this after all.
"But... if you're going to try and take that man on again... for that... you can call upon me again. For that I will stand by your side again." Even if it means potentially being stabbed in the back... or worse. Sakura is forgiving, almost to a fault. She counts among her friends gangsters of various stripes, hobos and rich men... she's no stranger to having strange friends.
It might put her at odds with her friends, saying this--she's heard through the grapevine that some of her friends are organizing a resistance campaign--but Sakura's never been afraid to go her own way. That's how she started down the path of Ansatsuken in the first place after all.
Sakura can't support Honoka? Honoka draws in her breath, and nods. "I know, I understand. It's..." She shrugs helplessly for a moment.
Honoka doesn't even know what she wants to say for a moment. Sakura's forgiving nature is completely at odds with hers. She's went through life expecting to have to do everything herself -- even in the circus, she feels that she has to pull her own weight. Other people look after her when she's sick, sure, but from day to day, there are clear expectations of responsibility. And Honoka had never taken the time out to ... build friendships. Why -now?- she wonders. She can tell Sakura's heart is beating strong, her spirit is lifting Honoka's mood.
"I... " She half-stands, crouching in front of Sakura's wheelchair. Reaches out, and places her hand on Sakura's. Squeezes tightly as she looks up into Sakura's eyes. (Shut up, you.) "That means a lot to me, Sakura. That even after all I've done... I can trust you." Her eyes quiver, just a bit... that vessel once more reaching capacity.
And, just like that, the moment is gone. Honoka rises back to her feet, closing her eyes. Tightly. "I just need to find him. Intelligence... is not telling me anything." Her eyes open again, dully finding Kasugano's once more. "I have to go again, but... I'll check up on you in two days. With a plan."
Because, as cheesy and trite as it may sound, friendships are strength. And Honoka is desperately searching for that. It's a struggle Sakura knows well. She turns her hand over as Honoka reaches for it, returns the grip with what strength she has. Hearing Honoka say she'll be back in two days, Sakura merely nods. She'll be ready.
"Find him," she says, her voice soft but intent.
"Find him, and we'll... set things right." Maybe. Or try. Try their hardest. Sakura may have fought Honoka--fought her hand and foot, tooth and nail, and been injured in the process--but she holds no resentment for that fight, no ill will for where it landed her. Sakura takes the wheels of her chair in hand and turns herself towards the elevator doors. This has been an enlightening talk but...
... it's tired her out. She doesn't look back for Honoka; she simply wheels herself towards the elevator. She needs a nap, or whatever she can get that will pass for one in the crowded hospital building.
Log created on 22:00:09 09/29/2014 by Sakura, and last modified on 10:06:01 09/30/2014.