SNF 2012.07 - SNF: "Trouble Sandwich"

Description: Jezebel fights for the pride of America while Brett, some how, some way, is drafted as the bulwark against the Star-Spangled Monolith, with monetary rewards at stake. However, the fight ends up nowhere near as close as the would-be bribers hoped. (Winner: Jezebel)



Iran. The Azadi Stadium. 9 PM.

And shamelessly shilling out.

The sandstone flooring of the arena, the ground bears few frills. It was actually the barebone of the stadium; it would be easier to add in different aspects, such as grass for polo, on the bedrock on an arena. The stadium bears all the modern fixtures, lights filling the overhead, and stands in a wide circle. Men fill the stands, with a portion sectioned off for the female audience. Standing aside with black burkas, a third, final section, fairly small and cloistered, was set aside for the international audience. A blend of all cultures, it was truly a contrast of three seperate walks of life.

And all to watch a pair of Americans to run at it.

Lightning Spangles stands in one corner, performing her stretching routine. She was dressed the part of the All-American Cowgirl... with a very noticable difference. Across her face, she bore an all-American flag bandana in the style of an old-west bandit, covering it. Her clothing was looser; less form-fitting than normal. It seems that she modified her outfit a bit, for this Saturday Night Fight, based on the locale. After all, she was under orders to respect the local culture.

But she wasn't going to diminish her hot American spirit!

And on the other side of that sandstone flooring is someone....less All-American than Lightning Spangles herself. At least, that seemed to be the impression given that was given considering the stakes of this fight. It's not like Brett Neuer isn't a patriot in his own right. But somehow, fate conspired to put him up against a much more obvious symbol of that American attitude as an adversary.

Someone must have mistaken him for a Canadian or something.

And it's not exactly a situation the hockey kid is exactly comfortable with. Frowning, he stood across from the spokeswoman with a rather...well, apologetic look on his face. Maybe this isn't the kind of fight he was really hoping for. "....So....um....yeah...." He ducked his head in a somewhat sad way before he started doing his usual set-up ritual. Thank god he didn't need to make accomodations for his own outfit. Well....aside from what the Middle Eastern heat would allow.

"What's the matter, pardner?"

Pulling back a leg, Lightning Spangles looks across towards Brett, eyes bright. She was almost limber now, but she was worried about her opponent. "You downright look right down in the dumps! You should be on the upswing! A fight with Lightning Spangles is a real rootin' tootin' right and shootin'!" She declares, dropping down her leg. "Maybe you need to get yourself all wound right on down, pardner! Cut it loose! Lets make it some real right proper introductions!"

And Lightning Spangles strides across the field.

Beelining it towards Brett, her hips sway with every step, her fake guns rattling with every swing. The woman was strutting towards the kid nearly half her age. Approaching the kid, she closes in, stopping just short of the teenager. Inspecting him, she looks up, and looks down. Smiling behind that hankerchief, she finally juts out a hand to shake.

"Howdy there Pardner! I'm Lightning Spangles, the All-American Heroine!"

Brett coughs a little, finishing up on his gloves and making sure his skates are fastened when Jezebel starts to stride across the fighting arena toward him. He looks up, blinking toward her before coughing again. "Um...yes, I know who you are, Ms. Spangles, Ma'am...we met before just before the NDP finals, remember?" he says, turning away a little, less out of embarrassment though (as tends to be the issue with Brett sometimes around beautiful women).

Shame? Something like that? It sure looks like something has the kid conflicted.

"Um...anyways, we should get ready to fight, shouldn't we?" he suggests to her, glancing back up to the much more modestly dressed cowgirl, smiling toward her in his best fake reassurance, before he starts going back through his pre-fight checklist. He's not exactly about to say out loud what he'd been offered to, as it was put, 'defeat America'.

After making sure one skate is properly cinched, Brett freezes up...and hurriedly lifts his head, taking Jezebel's hand and hastily shaking it before she gets too far away. "S-sorry. Just...a lot on my mind right now...."

Lightning Spangles waits.

Her eyes do not change. If her face was revealed, it would be locked in a smile. Throughout the entire, nervous introductions, she simply pauses, waiting for Brett to shake her hand. Of course, she remembered him from the NDP interviews. But that was a different gig. This was a fight. And thus, they did not know each other. They had to be stranger for the people at home! Of course, when he walks away.... she still doesn't change her stance.

It is only when her hand is shaken does she relax.

"It's gonna be okay, pardner!" Lightning Spangles pipes up brightly, hopping backwards with short, jumping steps. Increasing the distance between them, she finally drops into her defensive stance of Tae Kwon Do. "Just think about positive things, and how you are gonna give me the thumping of my dear life! That's the way to play! Think bright, think uplifting, and put your faith into God, Allah, who ever you believe in!" Jezebel gives a winning thumbs up to the cameras, before facing back to Brett. "I hope you show me some of those moves you showed the crowd for that NDP interview! And, well..." Lightning Spangles holds a bit. "... I'll ask you at the end of the match."

"Just let go of all that baggage!"

Brett swallows a little as he makes up for that faux pas of leaving Lightning Spangles waiting for the handshake, a sheepish look given to her as she tries to give him a pep up before the fight gets underway....not to mention preserving her upbeat image for the crowd back home. "Y-Yeah. I'll do just that," he says, rubbing the back of his neck as he turns aside again, finishing up the rest of his preparations.

Finally, he turns back around, helmet secured, gloves secured, skates secured, and stick firmly in ins grasp. "Ready..." he says softly, mostly to himself....then with a crack down of the stick down onto the sandstone floor, he sinks down into his usual face-off stance. Tossing his head back up, an intense glare comes out from underneath his helmet. Whatever was bugging him earlier, it's not bugging him now.

Game time.

And the match begins.

The judge gives the signal, the crowd breaking into a roar. All Lightning Spangles knew was that Masters Corporation, as well as all of America, was counting on her to win the title, and show the world that American is the greatest. Brett being paid to beat America? An utter mystery to Jezebel. All she knew was that Brett was out of his gloom, and Lightning Spangles, already in the spirit, just nods as Brett shares in the full Spangles spirit. "Okay, pardner! Lets get this hootinanny getting on!" She cries as she begins to break into a slow, building to a charge.

And then, she takes to the air.

Sweeping her legs in the air, she builds up aerial momentum. Swinging her leg around once, she swings her other leg in the air, building up the force for the initial leg to come around. She hurls out a butterfly kick, bringing the full power of the aerial roundhouse down hard towards Brett, attempting to smash through his protective gear with the flashiest kick this side of the Rio Grande.

Or rather, the Nile.

COMBATSYS: Jezebel has started a fight here.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Jezebel          0/-------/-------|


COMBATSYS: Brett has joined the fight here.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Brett            0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0          Jezebel


COMBATSYS: Brett blocks Jezebel's Strong Kick.

[  \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Brett            0/-------/------=|-------\-------\0          Jezebel


Conflict of interest seemingly forgotten, Brett looks the model of competition, fierce and imposing, a stark difference from his usual overly polite self. Most people who've seen him fight recognize this game face...and whatever he was concerned with before, it doesn't seem to be even in the back of his mind now, meetnig the attack with force of his own.

As the butterfly kick comes, Brett pushes into it, intercepting it on his gloves and stalling it mid-swing before it gains its full momentum and speed. He feels it through the padding of his gloves still, but better than getting smashed in the head with it after all.

eeling slightly from the shot, the former winger uses that momentum to swing around, trying to build up enough speed to swing back around after the cowgirl. After a sweep around on his wheels, he snaps around, trying to slash the heel of his stick out toward one of Spangles' knees on the pass.

COMBATSYS: Jezebel blocks Brett's Medium Strike.

[  \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///////////////////////////// ]
Brett            0/-------/------=|-------\-------\0          Jezebel


She put too much in the kick.

The swing of Lightning Spangles kick is caught by Brett, for better, and in this case, definately for worse. Lightning Spangles entire momentum is stopped, sending to woman unceramoniously to the ground in a tumble. Brett goes for the hack, and fortunately, Jezebel partially catches. Bringing forward her other leg, she brings both legs to bear, spreading the impact and deflecting the force. Unfortuntately, too much deflection, as Brett soon gets the glimpse of Lightning Spangle's wardrobe malfunction...
he lower portion of her pants cut away.

Naked below the knees, save for the boots, Jezebel's well-toned calfs hang before Brett's eyes as she hits towards the ground. But as she rolls, something is flying through the air. An American Flag, hanging high in the air. But it was too small to be a proper flag. And it is clear what had happened as Jezebel rises to a crouch.

Smiling face exposed to the crowd.

Face exposed, the crowd roars in outrage and desire, the beautiful face of the actress immodestly exposed to the whole of the crowd. Blushing brightly, she gazes towards the rushing Brett, the hockey player. "Wooo wee! Well, Brett, looks like you gave the crowd a real eyeful!" She states brightly, as she begins to build herself up. As red, white, and blue energy coarses over her, she begins to build up to a peak. "But how about we show them just how down and dirty we Americans can get! YEEE HAW!" She fires into the air, spiralling wildly as she attempts to catch Brett up in the drilling form, chi whirling around her.... before she finishes with a kick highlighted by a full, fireworks explosion of the American Flag.

"WHERE EAGLES DARE!"

COMBATSYS: Brett endures Jezebel's Where Eagles Dare EX.
~~ Alluring Hit! ~~

[        \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///////////////////////////// ]
Brett            0/-------/-======|==-----\-------\0          Jezebel


If Brett realized what he did, it doesn't seem like the crowd would notice. Still down low in that slouched hockey stance, he seems to be as aggressive as ever in posture, still rolling as he tries to gain some momentum. But down on the ground floor? Jez might notice a pinkening of the boy's cheeks as he realizes what he's done. SUre, not enough to pull him out of his game face, but he's not pure berzerker enough to not realize things like these.

And it's clear that embarrassment of the faux pas is enough to make his defense falter that when the fireworks start, all he can really do is absorb it, the explosive, drilling kick battering into him until she kicks him into the air with red, white, and blue.

But as he falls? He spins. And spins. His stick is extended out at his side as he falls toward her, trying to hack and slash at her in a descending spiral of high sticking.

COMBATSYS: Jezebel blocks Brett's Wild Spiral.

[         \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///////////////////////////   ]
Brett            0/-------/=======|===----\-------\0          Jezebel


Oh, Jezebel notices.

"Don't worry, sweetie! I didn't mean to mean nuttin'!" She states after the explosive kick comes. Ripping through the man's defenses, she lands with a bound, bouncing lightly as she returns to the ground. Standing upright, those taut, exposed calves tighten as she braces herself, that winning smile burning sensually with confidence. But that confidence was important; for Brett was not giving her a moment's respite. Already he was tearing intowards her, hurling the full force towards her. "This looks like real trouble!" She states, as Brett comes rolling in at full force. Jezebel manages to catch the block with her hands, nearly breaking her fingers in the process. Stumbling back, she shakes her head.

"I'm gonna need a little help!"

Suddenly, something appears on the big screen overhead. A bright-eyed Armadillo, armed with a fiddle and a coy little hankerscarf, looks down, waving his arms. "Lightning Spangles! Lightning Spangles!" The creature cries, as Jezebel looks like. "Well boy howdy! It's my good buddy, the Hoedown Dillo! What's up pardner!?" She calls up, tipping her hat to the man. "Lightning Spangles, I saw you were having some real trouble, so I got a friend of mine to send you some help! He is a real expret when it comes to sports you know. Why, he is even one of the big names in the International Sports Team, you know! What you done need is some equipment..."

"From The Big D! line of sporting goods and equipment."

From the sky, a pressure cannon suddenly launches a box through the air. Landing with a tumble in front of Lightning Spangles, she bends down to the box, cracking it open to reveal... A pair of kickboxing gloves. "Wow! This will really come in handy!" She exclaims, deftly putting the pair on as she tenses up. "Who am I to thank for this, Hoedown Dillo?" The armadillo just winks, and gives a little fiddle. "Just thank Heavy D!, pardner! And be sure to tell everyone about all his high quality products!" Lightning Spangles gives another tip of the hat, before turning back to Brett. "Okay pardner! It's time to show you just how the Heavy D! helps his friends!" She exclaims as she brings up her guard, those gloves ready to catch any oncoming blow."

And with it, she lunges in.

Firing with blazing speed, she unleashes a powerful straight kick, followed by a smash down with an axe-kick drop with the same leg. The one-two combo was designed to crush through Brett's defense even further. But once that was torn open, the double roundhouse kicks come, one leg to another leg. The ruthless four hit combo was trying to blaze Brett over... before Jezebel ends with a gloved thumbs up to the camera.

With the logo of The Big D! underneath her.

COMBATSYS: Brett fails to interrupt Quick and the Dead from Jezebel with Hurricane Check.
CSYS: This exciting moment brought to you by The Big D!'s Sporting Equipment!!

[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////    ]
Brett            1/-------/=======|===----\-------\0          Jezebel


This definitely wasn't the way Brett usually attacked. He was nowhere near the aerial sort...but you gotta do what you gotta do, and as he falls, he tries to make use of his predicament, spinning with that stick out fiercely. Unfortunately, Spangles manages to catch the strikes on her hands, and despite the force behind it, the hockey fighter can't break through as he finally hits the ground. His landing is unsteady...and it gives her the time to....

Advertise? Promote? Shill? What the hell?

The strange occurance is enough to even break Brett out of his usual game face, gawking at the sudden interference...and when Jezebel uses her new equipment to try and put the hurt on Brett, it's only by the grace of god that he gets his head on enough to see it coming.

Unfortunately, it's not enough for him to stop it, his attempt to come in high with his check only eating the straight kick, leaving him dazed enough for the following combo to go on unabated, the double roundhouses sending him sprawling across the sandstone in a concussed daze. "Uhhhhhnnn...."

There is a reason why Lightning Spangles is one of the most hated opponents in the SNF.

With the Hoedown Dillo providing legal interferance, Lightning Spangles uses the Big D! products.... indirectly. Yes, as the Hoedown Dillo fiddles away at the overhead, Lightning Spangles was practically squaredancin' "Yeah! That's the spirit!" She exclaims as the combo comes. As the roundhouse finish is unleashed, she waits to see if Brett recovers.

And when he doesn't, opportunity knocks.

Taking to the air, she leaps in a long, slow arc. "Come on, pardner! You gotta get on up! Think of all your fans back home!" She exclaims as she slowly swings her leg in a long, powerful arc. Energy building, she unleashes a volley of red, white, and blue orbs of chi, flickering with light. Aiming for around Brett instead of right at him, they will slam hard in the sandstone, the explosion delaying for a moment....

Before bursting in a field of tri-color fireworks.

"YEEEEEE-HAAAAW!"

COMBATSYS: Brett blocks Jezebel's Sundance.

[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////////////     ]
Brett            1/-----==/=======|====---\-------\0          Jezebel


Groaning as he tried to pull himself back up to his feet, Brett finds his ears filled with....Country Western square-dance music. Oh good god. That's just not right.

Trying to push himself back up despite the horrible soundtrack to the fight, the winger tries to re-establish his base, only for Jezebel to press the attack from afar. The volley of all-American fireworks flying toward him force another defensive stand from the kid, stick brought up to try and absorb the buffeting. He manages to survive it, but looking plenty worse for the wear. "Nnghhhhh...."

Even with that guilt hanging over his head over what money he'd have coming to him for this, he still has pride. And that pride isn't about to accept going down THIS badly. Pushing off with his stick, he tries to drive in hard and fast, beeline toward Jezebel as he picks up enough speed to throw himself into a full forward flip straight into the cowgirl with hopes of smashing into her with the heel and blades of his skate.

COMBATSYS: Jezebel dodges Brett's Falling Star EX.

[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////////////     ]
Brett            1/------=/=======|====---\-------\0          Jezebel


The fireworks display consumes the ground, giving Brett a chance to slow down. However, he doesn't slow down. His momentum not breaking, he was roaring back to the cowgirl as she hits the ground. "Watch out, Lightning Spangles!" The Hoedown Dillo cries out, as he keeps on a fiddlin' Jezebel looks up, and then looks over at the hockey star ripping over the sandstone, aiming straight for her.

But Jezebel keeps moving.

Taking long, steady steps to the side, she doesn't evade at the last minute, but builds towards the dodge. Brett was moving straight, that was a simple fact. Lighting Spangles just barely avoids the front-flip, the attack coming at full speed, ripping forward and blazing speed and power. The blades of the blades nearly hitting her nose, the woman swallows hard, her eyes wide, but her smile not fading

And in position for the follow-through.

Repositioning to Brett's flank, she swings her leg around hard, arcing it into a long, slow angle. She didn't have much time to readjust, and much time to strike. As Brett readjust, she slices down the long leg, the foot hacking hard in an axe kick, right for the top of Brett's helmet.

"You are doing great, kid! Don't lose heart!"

COMBATSYS: Brett fails to interrupt Heel Kick from Jezebel with Sir Stanley's Crush.

[                     \\\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////////////////     ]
Brett            0/-------/----===|====---\-------\0          Jezebel


The fireworks didn't slow Brett down much....but that doesn't seem to matter when Spangles has extra eyes to watch out for her, giving her warning before his crashing flip kick hits her full bore. Instead, the hockey fighter finds himself landing in empty space, forced to keep rolling to try and recover from the costly miss.

Pivoting back around, he tries to start up again but finds himself facing down a vicious looking axe kick. The strike is slow, giving Brett what seems like an opening to swing his stick up and catch Jez by the neck....unfortunately for him, it's not THAT slow, the kick slamming down into the top of his head and drilling him back into the floor enough to crack his helmet and smash him face down into the sandstone.

Lightning Spangles was getting a little too rough.

As he sends Brett to the ground, she begins to resposition. Looking down at Brett she circles the man, nervously. She was not used to having a successful run like this. Something was bothering Brett, she could sense it now. Something was throwing off his momentum. "Are you stable, pardner? Something is wrong." She asks sincerely, worried about him. "Come on, get on up!" She begins as she dips down low.

And she tries to place both hands of his shoulders.

If she gets the grips, Lightning Spangles will simply begin to swing him around, whirling him about to build momentum. She would simply release him, hurling him across the sandstone arena, hurling out a fierce, lightning spangles kick.

Right before he hits the ground.

COMBATSYS: Brett fails to interrupt Hang 'Em High EX from Jezebel with Hurricane Check.

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Jezebel          0/-------/---====|


COMBATSYS: Brett can no longer fight.

[     \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Jezebel          0/-------/---====|


Honestly, for all the conflict that Brett had about the events surrounding this fight, it wasn't like he wasn't trying or anything. But try as he might, he just ends up finding himself being more and more plastered every time he ever dares to try something. And the concern Spangles was trying to show just frustrated him more and more. Not because it wasn't genuine, but because....

For all that training Brett's been trying to get to take on real enemies and monsters....and on a stage like this, he's basically being smashed into the ground by someone who seems to be barely trying. That frustrates Brett, and when Spangles tries to pull him back up, he tries to swing on her....but instead, he just ends up feeding into her own swing, taken by the shoulders and flung about round around until he was tossed up, and kicked away like a ragdoll.

And by the time he lands, he's already out cold. Not even a chance to make it competitive before he could throw the fight like he planned....

Barely trying?

That's the shameful secret of Jezebel. For all the smokes and mirrors... she was trying. She was really trying. She wasn't pretending to fight; she was really giving it her all. In many ways, it made these fights unfair for her opponents. For all the assistance that she received, she could make it on her own. Jezebel might not make it.

But Lightning Spangles could.

As the finishing kick comes, she bounces up... to the boos of the crowd. The entire crowd bursts out in catcalls, roaring as Brett goes down. Lightning Spangles look up, confounded. As the stones and cups come flying the arena, it was very clear that Brett was the favorite here, not Jezebel. The actress fighter, staggering back, gets the fight called to her by a panicked judge. As the debris fills the field, she begins to flee the grounds, the security coming out. This was the wrong venue. But from the stands, a strange group of men begin to leave the arena.

Glowering down at the two fighters.

It would probably be only afterwards that word came out about the supposed reward that would have come from defeating Spangles, as the American representative. Brett, for his part, would've catagorically rejected any insinuations that he would've accepted the money....but past that, he would've likely remained to him self for the most part after the match. Possibly out of shame for the entire thing and his tagging as the 'Anti-American' representative....possibly for the shameful performance itself.

Or maybe the voice message he would've found afterwards....

Log created on 18:47:52 07/31/2012 by Brett, and last modified on 23:15:09 08/02/2012.