SNF 2019.01 - SNF: Christmas Cake Cleanup

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Description: It's ladies night! Which is to say single ladies, specifically. But as the night goes long, its closing time. With one last call, all the ladies must finish their whiskey and beer; they don't have to go home, but they can't stay here. The leftovers require a special touch, and that is where Makoto Nayana comes in. Unfortunately for her, that includes Litchi, who is totally not single and has a boyfriend who lives in the Canada part of the Boundary. Fighting ensues, because it's all theater! Mean-spirited theater, but theater nevertheless.



[LITCHI]
LAST TIME, ON LITCHI FAYE LING THEATER:

"uuuugh i'm depressed"
"Hey Tons'O'Buns, I need your help with something sneaky. Stop drinking."
":sigh: :crying: okay"

BUT BEFORE THAT THREAD OF THINGS PROCEEDS...

The stageplay begins. The appointed bartender (actually an SNF employee) declares that it's closing time. Someone puts THAT DAMN SONG on the radio. Litchi Faye Ling remains seated at the bar, and she glances off stage and nods slightly before raising up her large beer bottle.

Yes, beer in a large bottle! The Party Quart, as they called it in the 1950s - or, in some quarters, "the white man's forty." Litchi had had a cold one set in front of her and it is now that she is downing it with a slightly comedic urgency.

Litchi is able to do this and has actually cut some water weight to avoid this being uncomfortable. (SNF paid for a very nice sauna!)

Litchi realizes, UNBEKNOWNST TO HER or her ERSTWHILE FIGHTPPONENT, that this is not a gimmicked bottle full of diluted carbonated apple juice like she expected. It does, in fact, contain fine crisp Tsingtao lager.

Litchi doesn't slow down. She's earned this.

[MAKOTO NANAYA]
Makoto Nanaya, on the other hand, has been hard to find since she made her... escape? Resignation? Very *aggressive* resignation? from the NOL. She had decided it would be a good idea to stay out of sight for a while and hope that Hazama, or the thing driving Hazama sometimes, found it too awkward to actually explain where she'd went and send the hunters after her.

But she needs to eat, and the only source of income she has left is what used to be a cover for her - a street fighter of some popularity and skill despite the unfortunate nature of her Darkstalker heritage. And so she signed up for SNF again, just like nothing was wrong.

And *that* put her up against Litchi Faye Ling. Well, that was unexpected.

But Makoto decided to play it straight, or as straight as she ever does, and that means playing along with the SNF theatre so she gets paid. If she's lucky, Litchi will be too, and Colonel Clover didn't secretly send her after Makoto.

Right now she is watching in minor awe as Litchi goes through a quart of beer without slowing down much. Now, Makoto has been known to put away more than her share of food and drink, but she normally comes up for air now and again. (But only occasionally. She used to get ribbed for that.)

She actually lets Litchi finish about three quarters of it before she steps up, tapping her sharply on the shoulder. "Hey," she says. "Hey, I think you've had about enough, don't you? It's time to get out of here before everything closes up for real."

Makoto is dressed differently than her usual fighting outfit, or at least she's thrown an orange jacket over it, closed only up near the top. She does not have her tonfa on, but they're in a carrier in an X over the small of her back, half-hidden behind her tail, with swishes side to side absently. Also, she has not had any beer and is feeling like she got the worse end of this play-acting.

[LITCHI]
"Hey, hey, HEY come ON," Litchi complains as she's tapped, turning around with her bottle still in her hands. She raises her hand to cover her mouth and silently expel some air. (Lao Jiu makes an extremely tiny and sweet 'prorp' noise on his part. He's digging this too.)

"I'm not FINISHED," Litchi says, leaning forwards heavily and waggling the bottle at Makoto, "and I don't APPRECIATE you actin' like you've got a big head just because you've gotten down in the world and you're oh god I'm gonna -"

Litchi pauses... and then exhales. Her face reddens as she slouches sleazily back against the bar, reaching up to push her glasses back up her nose with the rim of the bottle.

"I'm not going ANYWHERE," Litchi concludes. "You can have my beer when you pry it from my cold dead fingers, because you'll have to murder me, and also because I'll die!!"

COMBATSYS: Litchi has started a fight here.

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Litchi           0/-------/-------|


COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya has joined the fight here.

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Litchi           0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[MAKOTO NANAYA]
Makoto thinks the panda is absolutely *adorable*. She will never, ever say this.

Makoto thinks Litchi is cute too, but it's a different kind of cute, and it's kind of hampered by a couple facts. One of which is that nobody is cute when they're belligerently drunk. Makoto lets Litchi ramble at her for a moment, taking a wise step back just in case she gets sick -

But no. Instead, she makes a challenge. And Makoto is up to the challenge.

Makoto steps forward again, grabbing at the bottle. She may surprise Litchi with her raw strength as she just yanks it away, waggling it at Litchi before she tilts it back, chugging what's left in it. Makoto's eyes widen at the taste of it - this isn't fake or non-alcoholic at all! She can tell just from the taste! Also, there's more of it left than she thought. Maybe this wasn't her greatest plan, but she's certainly not going to back off *now*.

It takes her a few moments before she lowers the now completely empty bottle, waving it at Litchi again. "There," she says. "Now you have to leave. You don't have anything left to drink!" Pause. "And who's got a big head? Come on, you're coming with me."

Makoto reaches out again. This time she's not trying to tap Litchi on the shoulder, though - she's literally trying to drag her along with her, and because this is a SNF, Makoto is perhaps not quite as gentle as she would be if she was actually leading a drunk lady.

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya successfully hits Litchi with Quick Throw.

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Litchi           0/-------/------=|=------\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[LITCHI]
Lao Jiu knows his theme is 'Bringing Sexy Back.'

Litchi never had it lose. The liquor is wrestled from her and Litchi makes a high squealing noise and then a "GIVE THAT BACK" and a little scrabble and then she is GRASPED and she is PULLED and the INDIGNITY OF IT ALL!

She drags her heels. She goes limp. But to no avail. "I'm not going to come with you in a million years!!" she declares, throwing up her hand. And then, over in the umbrella rack, where she had left it -- is --

MATENBO! Which flies towards Litchi with sudden and energetic force. There is only one problem for this from the perspective of our heroine (the other one, with the squirrel ears): Matenbo was on the far side of Litchi relative to her.

And so, a big heavy piece of wood is about to whack into her.

COMBATSYS: Litchi successfully hits Makoto Nanaya with Mantenbo.

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Litchi           0/-------/---====|====---\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[MAKOTO NANAYA]
Makoto is pretty aggressive about taking the alcohol away. She doesn't precisely regret it, but she wasn't expecting it to be actual beer that Litchi was drinking. So much for theatre.

"Well, you're already coming!" Makoto pushes Litchi, but hears something at the last moment. She turns, releasing her grip on Litchi just in time for

*whap*

Mantenbo did not hit Makoto in the front. Nor did it hit her in the side. She turned, her tail fluffing up, just in time to get smacked right across the rear with it hard enough to make her jump, along with a yelped sound that sounds like nothing so much as 'yeep'. "That's fighting dirty!" Makoto yells, as Mantenbo slides past her to move to Litchi's easy reach.

As for Makoto, though, she reaches behind her, shrugging her tonfas onto her the back of her wrists. They're not regular tonfas; they're more punching weights and guards, and Makoto bounces in place, raising her fists like she was about to box. "I guess it's time to go all out! I'll get you out of here if I have to hit you from here to the moon!"

Makoto suddenly lunges after a swerve to the side, her fist and tonfa on that hand shimmering with chi as she drives a single solid punch directly at Litchi's midsection. One, she finds, is generally all she needs. "Coming throoooough!"

COMBATSYS: Litchi blocks Makoto Nanaya's Shooting Star.

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Litchi           0/-------/-======|====---\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[LITCHI]
"NOT YET I'M NOT," Litchi says before she seizes Mantenbo and breathes out. The staff seems to give her strength and authority - perhaps it heals her. Staff problems are always the worst.

"... I'm sorry," Litchi says, shifting back into a more readied, slightly wavering stance. "You know it's not personal, I just got away from myself a little there. That stuff is strrrrrrrkkgghghghk-"

Litchi's face turns slightly green as she's struck.

But Mantenbo was raised. She is not hit right in the breadbasket but in a cross-wise way, the buffer of the bo providing her with room to maneuver. It means that she is able to dry-swallow rather than having the beer make a repeat appearance. She seems very glad about this. So does Lao Jiu. Staggering back a step she says, "Wh... whew... okay, okay, hold on, I'm going to -"

"Look, just - hold on -"

"Aaargh!"

Mantenbo is hurled forwards, but it rotates in front of her, whirling into a huge disk of twisting dark wood and the flashing highlights of chi! Punch through THAT!

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya blocks Litchi's Heavenly Hand.

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Litchi           0/-------/=======|=====--\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[MAKOTO NANAYA]
Makoto can't help it. She never learned how to hold back. Sometimes that means hitting people in the gut, whether or not it's a good idea.

It wouldn't be the first time it was a horrible idea, honestly.

"Well if it's too strong for you, maybe you shouldn't have had so much of it!" Makoto kicks the empty bottle away from her, on that note, so she doesn't step on it; she dropped it when she shrugged her tonfa on and it's just been rolling around since. "And anyway, you haven't seen 'too strong' yet. I haven't really gone all - whoa!"

Makoto was not expecting the staff to whirl into a shield like that. She catches the spinning weapon against one of her metal tonfa with a loud thump, and at first it looks like she's throwing herself away from it - but her tail makes contact with the ground, sliding her forward on her back underneath it.

She almost doesn't fit. She has to press her shoulders and upper back down against the floor as hard as she can without breaking her slide, exhale, and she still only clears under the whirling Mantenbo by about a millimeter at her highest points.

She's pressing down so hard that her jacket catches on a rough patch on the floor. Makoto's response is to wiggle and the whole thing comes off; when she rises, she's now just in her usual fighting outfit, which she had on under it. She pushes herself up nearly underneath Litchi, rising in a mighty uppercut to lift her opponent into the air along with her. "Hold onto this!!"

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya successfully hits Litchi with Corona Upper EX.
~~ Alluring Hit! ~~

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Litchi           1/---====/=======|=====--\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[LITCHI]
The great staff whirls, as if after an eternity, after an instant.

"I know what I can take," Litchi grumps as the staff makes contact, more or less. After this she reaches up to catch the staff as it comes back towards her, just in time for Makoto to abruptly appear in front of her! Litchi's eyes bug out of her head, almost literally, because that power-slide should have taken the fur off her tail! (Litchi is accepting the tail.)

And then

RISING
BURST
CORONA UPPER

~ s t a y t h i r s t y ~

The searing light smashes Litchi upwards. One might say without being factually inaccurate that Litchi is immediately knocked up, but a clearer statement would be that she is blown backwards, smashing into the wooden slats covering the window of the Pao Pao cafe-slash-bar with sufficient force to rock the building, to make the red light wobble and then fall off its lantern, to make Litchi herself flop partway out of -

Oops.

Litchi lands, leaning against the wall. Mantenbo wobbles as it stands in front of her, in a curiously concealing way. Litchi's eyes widen - she pushes her glasses up her nose with her thumb - and then says, "I only have one thing to say to THAT."

She takes a deep breath that will make an editor concerned about the mainland market panic because that one's going on the excerpt and then sweeps a hand forwards. "THIRTEENORPHANS," she blurts out, as Lao Jiu's eyes glow with unwonted levels of intensity, a deep and profound force even as Litchi turns and advances, hip first. Not to strike Makoto - but to gesture forwards.

But the real kuma shock comes when Mantenbo SPROUTS ARMS AND LEGS and advances forwards, a horrid parody of a cartoon face coming to life. One good step forwards and then the staff-man hurls himself into a whirling dervish aimed to smash into Makoto! When in trouble, when in doubt: Control your staff man, spin and shout!

While Mantenbo is doing this, Lao Jiu glances down and Litchi's bra re-fastens. (Thank you, Lao Jiu, thinks the editor - or he would, if the panda was better known. Lao Jiu will have his own fame and solo album one day.)

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya dodges Litchi's Thirteen Orphans.

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Litchi           0/-------/---====|=====--\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[MAKOTO NANAYA]
Makoto has always stayed thirsty. It is, in fact, a well-known trait.

A solid hit! Makoto feels the impact of the blow through her fist, down her arm and into her core, muscles tensing against the force. She holds the uppercut position for several long moments before bounding out of it, returning to her active stance, fists raised and light on her feet.

"Do you really?" Makoto pauses for a moment, then adds, because she can't help herself: "I can appreciate that. But that doesn't change the fact that it's time to go home!" She's watching Litchi intently, perhaps expecting something to happen. Something like -

There!

Makoto leans well to the side Litchi is facing as Litchi advances, hip-first, her eyes watching Litchi's center of mass (more or less) as Lao Jiu does his job. She doesn't have time to do anything else before Mantenbo is approaching, and though at first she assumes it's just going to be a swing, she is suddenly proven dangerously wrong.

"WHY DOES IT HAVE ARMS," Makoto yells, as she finishes her sidestep, turning it into a forward rush. She goes low as she does, tumbling past Mantenbo in a roll before performing a handstand, attempting to wrap her legs around Litchi's head, squeezing as she tries to put in a hold!

While that's bad enough, Makoto has an extra limb, and she makes use of it, battering at Litchi's face and shoulders. Getting hit by the tail doesn't really hurt; it's a little like being bashed by a pillow wrapped in a fur rug. But it is disorienting, and makes it a little more of a surprise when Makoto attempts to turn the headscissors into a roll, delivering a HURRICANRANA - American version, since she doesn't go for a pin afterwards, merely flinging Litchi toward a table. "I didn't come here to fight a pole!"

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya successfully hits Litchi with Tail Barrage.
~~ Alluring Hit! ~~

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Litchi           1/------=/=======|======-\-------\0    Makoto Nanaya


[LITCHI]
"I will NEVER go home!!" Litchi protests. (The panda nods.)

Then she protests back further as she rises, somehow, yes, making it sound like a protest even as the whirling dervish of a staff runs forwards. The protesting shout is: "TO GRAB ONTO YOU??" And then to her great and enormous dismay, she is presented with a mouthful of brow fur which proceeds to pound her face and knock her glasses askew, leaving her spluttering and pinwheeling backwards.

At which point she has thighs put around her head and she is HURLED! Through the very WINDOW! Back into the bar!

I always end up back in this place, Litchi thinks as she feels her stomach slosh around. She pushes herself upwards, letting out a breath. "Some days, you fight the pole, and some days..."

Litchi looks up. At Makoto? No, past her. "Return!" she cries out - and Mantenbo, which had returned to an ordinary staff form, complies! Of course Makoto is at the wrong angle to be struck, but this is close enough for Litchi to vault through the window and call forth, with a sudden surge of power and a blue-white glow in Lao Jiu's eyes:

"The Great Wheel!"

At which point Mantenbo erupts, rising up with a surge forwards that turns it from a girthily conventional bo staff into something a lot closer to a battering ram. Right at Makoto's nuts! ... In the sense of her abdomen; which is no doubt full of them.

"... oh, right," Litchi says mid-air: "Sometimes the pole fights you."

Also, Litchi was too drunk to remember her technique names. Lightweight!!

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya blocks Litchi's The Great Wheel.

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Litchi           0/-------/-----==|=======\-------\1    Makoto Nanaya


[MAKOTO NANAYA]
"Well tell it to keep its hands to itself!"

Makoto bounds back to her feet after flipping Litchi through a window, feeling pretty satisfied about that hit. Surely that's enough to keep Litchi down... she's drunk, isn't she? She saw her go through all that beer!

But maybe it hasn't worked its way with her yet, Makoto mentally adds, as Litchi pulls the rod back toward her. Makoto bounds sideways, even though she barely needed to get out of range to avoid the sideswiping blow. She's more worried about Litchi catapulting herself into Makoto, which would be okay except for the part where Makoto would worry it would be either a) a prelude to a tactical maneuver, winning Litchi the battle or b) a prelude to Litchi being sick on her from all these flips.

Absolutely none of Makoto's plans accounted for the staff reshaping itself like that.

Makoto's instincts, however, are finely honed. She brings her arms down and manages to catch the onrushing staff with both of her tonfa at once, arms parallel to each other - but the force is still enough to slide her back a good ten feet on sheer impact. She's impressed by the force of the blow. (The status of her nuts remain unknown.)

"Damn... you don't really hold back, do you. Good thing neither do I!" Despite that, Makoto's advance is more tentative than before. Not especially so, mind you. Mostly it's because she started from further away; she has to step forward before she goes low, swinging her fists in a rapid series of blows toward Litchi's legs, a rapid left-right-left of punches that pick up in speed and power as she goes.

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya successfully hits Litchi with Medium Strike.

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Litchi           0/-------/-======|=======\==-----\1    Makoto Nanaya


[LITCHI]
"Don't you hand me no lies and keep your pole to yourself!" Litchi counters Makoto before she stares dead ahead as Makoto bounces out of the way. She dodged to the side?! From the incredulous look in Litchi's liquor-hazed eyes, she can't believe the use of this 'third' dimension.

No it wasn't a bounce of the way - tonfa! A parry, a hoist, a knock-back as Litchi arches her back to cry out, "Riichi!! The victory is mine!!" Is she saying her own name? No, it's unrelated. Her mahjong induced erotic delirium is short lived, though, because Makoto is lunging forwards. "Return!" Litchi declares, before realizing - too late - that Mantenbo...

Had already returned...

Lao Jiu's lips mouth a silent word of warning but it's too late.

"Buh!!" Litchi declares as Makoto's punchdown rush hits her right in the abdomen hard enough for little flecks of saliva to fly out of her mouth. How unladylike--! She is driven backwards, though not flying - but she does trip over a chair and topple backwards, one long leg upraised scenically as she says, flat on her back, "I don't wanna fight about it any more."

Litchi groans. "Uugh... blrgh..."

She lapses immediately into a semi-conscious state. This is not really feigned and the SNF crew will have to revive her afterwards, though no permanent harm will be said. But why did she whine a little bit about 'roy'? The mystery deepens. Lao Jiu holds no answers...

But the winner is Makoto!!

COMBATSYS: Litchi takes no action.

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Makoto Nanaya    1/-----==/=======|


COMBATSYS: Litchi can no longer fight.

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Makoto Nanaya    1/-----==/=======|


[MAKOTO NANAYA]
"Richie /what/?" Makoto does not play mahjong. She is immune to Litchi's tile-playing trickery, and it does not interrupt her en route to PUNCHING.

...

Having sent Litchi flying, Makoto feels momentarily... well, not guilty, because both Makoto and Litchi signed up for this. "Did I overdo it?" she asks herself more than anyone else, shaking out the hand she just smashed into Litchi's stomach before pushing her tonfa back, slightly up her arm.

"Hey," she calls, as she ducks in to retrieve her jacket. Ugh, ripped down the back. She should have guessed. "I know you probably won't remember this, but I had fun. Call me! I'll buy you a drink when you *don't* need to get thrown out." This is half a lie; Makoto would personally be perfectly okay with buying Litchi a drink or two, but she doesn't want anything to do with a known member of the NOL right now. Hazama might find out where she's at...

Which is also why Makoto beats feet pretty soon thereafter, before anyone from NOL shows up to collect Litchi and give her a ride home. Maybe that named 'Roy'. Rude! But it keeps her safe, for the moment.

COMBATSYS: Makoto Nanaya has ended the fight here.

Log created on 20:35:52 01/19/2019 by Makoto Nanaya, and last modified on 10:51:53 01/29/2019.