Match of the Millennium

A 'roundup' broadcast is released after the conclusion of the final match of Round 1 of the tournament, featuring commentators Tom Bradley and 'Loverboy' Lou Harris. TOM: "Good evening, folks! It's your boys Tom and Lou, here to bring you the results and highlights from our first week of NFG matches." LOU: "That's right, kids. And some of these results may shock you!" TOM: "They certainly shocked some of our competitors!" Both men laugh aloud before their expressions fade awkwardly. TOM: "Too soon?" LOU: "Yeah, probably. On with the rundown!" JOHN DOE versus HAWKSLEY TOM: "Yeesh. Well, let's just say that by the time this one was done, one of the competitors was so badly injured that he was mistaken for a zombie!" LOU: "Yeah, and we have a clip of that happening!" =*= FOOTAGE: ZOMBIE SIGHTING =*= Coco turns around to face Hawksley as he touches her arm. "I already showed my card at the bar, love -" The sight of Hawksley's swollen nose and bruised jaw cause her to recoil abruptly, her blue-grey eyes widening. "Zombie!" She reflexively pushes a hand into Hawksley's face to keep him away. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "And he's the guy who won!" LOU: "What a brutal finish, too. Check out the VOD if you haven't already!" A link to the VOD flashes below: http://motm.kicks-ass.net/log/idx/0012026.shtml (Continued in next post!)

(Continued from previous post) COCO versus AYALA TOM: "Let's move onto our second round!" LOU: "Ayala 'Barbarella' Feldspar versus Coco 'Zombie Spotter' Coalbridge." TOM: "You said that this would be a competition to see which of these ladies could kick the highest." LOU: "I did. And I compiled a comparison to see which of these competitors completed this sidequest. Here's the winning entry." =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= When Ayala starts to crackle with electricity, Coco's eyelashes flutter rapidly in disbelief. "What in the bloody -" She recoils, guard at the ready, but she knows instinctively that she doesn't want that live wire lady anywhere near her person. She crouches down, sucking in a deep breath through her nostrils, and leaps - launching herself up and over the lunging lightning rod and seeming to almost hang in the air as the laws of gravity are momentarily suspended. It's not the kind of athleticism that one would expect to see in a contest for such novice fighters, and it even seems to catch Coco herself off-guard. Attempting to make the most of the mysterious fluctuation as she starts to fall, she swings her long leg around, extending a wrapped foot to try and deliver a descending roundhouse to the back of the blonde battle-babe before she herself hits the ground! COMBATSYS: Coco successfully hits Ayala with Diving Kick. -* CRITICAL HIT! *- ~~ Alluring Hit! ~~ "Get back here--nomph--Ayala chomp you!" the cavegirl seems quite agitated that the brawling fashionista has gotten away from her again--the electricity dissipating when the leg comes around and wallops her on the side of the head--blood droplets flying from where her teeth cut her lips. Ayala is bowled over and winds up on all fours again, pulling herself up after she rolls a bit, from the force of the blow, and pulls herself up to her feet. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "Well, she certainly had some elevation on that kick." LOU: "Exactly. And that kick was definitely the turning point in what was an otherwise close match. Ergo, as I predicted, a contest to see who kicks highest. In this case, Coco won." TOM: "At least she'll know where to aim her kicks in case she's ever attacked by a real zombie." LOU: "If there was such a thing as a real zombie. Ha!" A link to the VOD flashes below: http://motm.kicks-ass.net/log/idx/0012027.shtml (Continued in the next post!)

(Continued from previous post) DJAMILA versus ICHIKA TOM: "Well, Lou, we didn't have a lot to say about this match before. How are you feeling about it now?" LOU: "I thought poledancing as a fighting style was something that could exist only in the realm of dreams. Djamila has lifted the scales from my eyes." TOM: "When do you start training?" LOU: "Tuesday morning. I'll tell you who really felt awkward about this match, though. Ever had that teenage moment where you feel like your dad's a little too interested? How about in the middle of getting kicked by an upside-down exotic dancer?" =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= The display might not be a traditional fighting style, but the swinging legs still manage to catch Ichika as she takes into the sky, and for a moment her eyes sweep over the crowd. Yes, her father is still there, cheering away and watching Djamila's display with a *notable* amount of interest, even as the woman assaults his daughter. Why had she suspected it would be anything else? She takes another deep breath, and tries to regain her focus. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "And what about this line from Djamila?" =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= Djamila does have to say something. "Your problem is, you want to best me, and you can't." She gives a grin. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= LOU: "Oh, man. That one really seemed to get under Ichika's skin. Imagine the lady your dad's been ogling telling you you can't match up." =*= START ICHIKA.GIF =*= The girl straightens and runs a hand through her hair, brushing it back and away from her eyes. She cracks her neck, and flicks the blood from her sword. Then, slowly and very deliberately, she sheathes it. One hand remains resting on the hilt as she stares down the blind fighter. Any trace of amusement has completely disappeared from her demeanor. =*= END ICHIKA.GIF =*= TOM: "That face says it all. It certainly seemed to get in Ichika's head and may well have cost her the match. I'm not sure these two left it all in the ring." LOU: "Well, maybe Djamila did, but then again, you'd expect that, wouldn't you?" A link to the VOD flashes below: http://motm.kicks-ass.net/log/idx/0012025.shtml (Continued in the next post!)

(Continued from previous post) SARAH versus NURSE SAYURI TOM: "This might have been one of the most surprising matches of the round. Not least of which because cheerleader Amber withdrew from the competition rather than face Sayuri due to trypanophobia." LOU: "I don't blame her. I'm afraid of needles myself." TOM: "In her place we had late entry Sarah Kuzumi from Manchester. She seemed to hold her own pretty well until something in Sayuri flipped." LOU: "The momentum in a match can always change, especially when medical equipment gets involved." TOM: "Ultimately it was Sayuri's unsafe use of narcotics and electroshock equipment as well as her ruthlessness in coming after an incapacitated Sarah with a needle that saw her disqualified from the tournament." =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= "Patient's pulse rate is dropping. Time to take a sample before it falls too low." Sayuri starts sauntering slowly toward her fallen opponent, leaning down and carefully guiding the gleaming needle's point toward Sarah's arm... Suddenly, a member of the NFG security team tackles Sayuri from behind, forcing a pair of handcuffs on her as another wrenches the needle away. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "It's a bit of a grey area, but the official ruled on the day that Sayuri's actions were not sanctioned." LOU: "Yeah, pulling a sword on another fighter is one thing, but drugging them and hooking 'em up to an EKG? That was definitely crossing a line. Especially the needle afterward." *shudder* TOM: "Time will tell if Sayuri shows back up in the NFG, but for now, Sarah moves forward to the next round. This was definitely not one for the squeamish." A link to the VOD flashes below: http://motm.kicks-ass.net/log/idx/0012034.shtml (Continued in the next post)

(Continued from previous post) NIXIE versus BUFORD TOM: "You mentioned sidequests earlier, Lou. I'm guessing you're familiar with matches between swordsmen and goblins." LOU: "My granddaughter loves arr-pee-gees, Tom. She got me into one of those emm-emm-oh's." TOM: "So, that makes you the expert on this next match." LOU: "You mean the one where the lonely warrior tries his best to woo the maiden, showering her with praise, only to be ultimately rejected and humiliated? I thought you'd be the expert, Tom." TOM: "I'm feeling slightly undermined here, Lou." LOU: "And so did Buford after this clip." =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= Buford waits in repose, waiting for the next move as the goblin of a female persuasion, the green skinned maiden clearly stunned speechless at the mysterious and misty movements of Buford becomes too much. Especially with her outfit being so neatly cut at strategic places as to show some- but it seems the wiles of the Nixie manages to catch the honorable swordsman off guard. Noticing the sigil too late from under his fedora, it erupts into a blast, sending him flailing into the air. Wildly swinging his arms, he manages to barely rip his sword out from it's sheath, falling towards Nixie in not only a wild aerial slash, but with a full force body slam. All with the cry upon his lips. "M'LAaaaaaady!" =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "He really is one of the coolest fighters in the competition." LOU: "I'm sure 'm'lady' will be on the lips of everyone he meets." TOM: "Remember to vote for your favourite clip on 'GIF of the week!'" A link to the VOD flashes below: http://motm.kicks-ass.net/log/idx/0012028.shtml (Continued in next post!)

(Continued from previous post) BRIAN STORM versus ISAMU TOM: "What a fantastic match this one was. It's a real shame about all the technical difficulties." LOU: "No kidding! Not only did Brian Storm's microphone cut out five seconds into his three minute long promo cut, we still haven't managed to get the VOD live on the website as of this broadcast." TOM: "It didn't help that Isamu took out half of the camera crew when he missed that flying splash from the apron." LOU: "Or that the wifi went down two minutes into the match." TOM: "You really had to be there, folks. Anyway, Brian eventually managed to defeat Isamu after they decided to settle the match with an impromptu drinking contest twenty minutes into the fight." LOU: "It turned out that Brian had replaced his own vodka with drinking water. He's actually straight-edge. What a scamp!" TOM: "And that dive off of the ladder was something else." LOU: "It's worth repeating:" TOM & LOU: "You had to be there." (Continued in next post!)

(Continued from previous post) CHEVY versus TAMAKI LOU: "Now, this one was a really heart-felt match that showed how just because two young ladies are opponents doesn't mean they can't still be friends." TOM: "Is that what you took from it? I thought it showed how feigning friendship can be used to take advantage of your opponent." LOU: "You're too cynical, Tom. Chevy wouldn't take advantage of Tamaki like that." TOM: "Not who I was talking about, Lou. Besides, why don't you just admit why you really liked this fight." LOU: "You mean the adorable raccoon magic?" TOM: "I mean the wet t-shirts." LOU: "Sounds like you're projecting, Tom." TOM: "This one almost turned really hard to call after this little trick by Tamaki." =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= Tamaki manages to break the armbar before it's fully locked in, though not before she's downed. She scoots along the floor in a rather undignified manner before rolling to a seated position, then rises the rest of the way. "Let's!" she calls back, then twirls in place. A sudden gust of wind wraps around her, hiding her from view for a few moments - and when it clears, Tamaki isn't there any more. Instead... ..there's Chevy?? This Chevy is a match for the first, except she doesn't have her pole with buckets, and she *does* have Tamaki's ears, if not her tail. They wiggle as she turns back to the real Chevy. "I thought I'd try it on for size," she says, "since you seemed so excited." She takes a step forward, then another. "Do you know what to do with yourself? Because I certainly don't!" Chi forms in Tamaki-Chevy's hands, though it isn't water because she can't do that. Just shimmering energy, one ball on each hand. It seems to have the *momentum* like the buckets of water though as Tamaki rushes forward, spinning as she goes, reaching out both arms in a spinning cyclone - - though after both arms get a chance to strike, Tamaki puts a foot wrong, and slips on the wet floor. Her foot slides right out from under her, and - already dizzy from spinning - Tamaki lands on her back in a picture-perfect cartoon slip and slide. As soon as she hits the ground, there's another burst of chi and wind, and Tamaki is just Tamaki again, not Chevy at all. ..she probably didn't mean to do that part. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= LOU: "Ha, no kidding. Imitate your opponent's appearance then knock yourself out. Clever girl!" TOM: "Tamaki did end up taking the win after a real close one." LOU: "Which just goes to show that friendship is the real victory." A link to the VOD flashes below: http://motm.kicks-ass.net/log/idx/0012031.shtml (Continued in the next post!)

(Continued from previous post) GENIE versus KENZO TOM: "Woof. It's hard to talk about this one without making it seem one-sided." LOU: "I'll say this to counter that: Kenzo got off to a good start. Classic Izuna Drop. The rest? Well..." TOM: "Genie is definitely one to watch out for, that's for sure. It only took a few good hits for her to take Kenzo out." LOU: "Hey, you gotta give Kenzo some credit. After all, there was this." =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= "A-ah! Sorry if it was a bit much. It's a work in progress! ... eep!" Genie finds herself without time to say much more because Kenzo is whirling chains and lightning around in a deft manuever with his kusarigama. In that moment, young Swiss woman takes several deep breaths, one, then two, then three, and furrows her brow again. "Just like you practice, Genie, and -- yah!!" She thrusts her palms out and that same sparkly energy gathers into a vague shield shape, though it looks more like a frisbee or a manhole cover. No matter the faulty shape, it still is solid and reflective, able to deflect the chains and lightning back away toward Kenzo! The weight slams into the shield and then Kenzo suddenly has all of that electricity redirected into him with the weight smacking into his head. There's a moment where his combat specs overload and his readouts are nonexistent. His systems get a moment to reboot as he gets up once more. =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "You're right. He definitely did some damage to himself, there." LOU: "We also had our second instance of a rich girl finding themselves completely surprised by the fact that the opponent they've just been beating up ended up unconscious." =*= FIGHT FOOTAGE =*= "A-ah!" Genie is still standing there with her palm extended when Kenzo comes to a stop from the rolling. She blinks several times. "Are you OK?!" she asks abruptly, throwing out the fact that this too could be a ruse to leave her exposed to a counterattack. She sprints toward the Japanese man and hunkers down. "I didn't think it'd hit quite that hard -- should I call for a medic?" =*= END FOOTAGE =*= TOM: "Well, we can't exactly expect too much worldliness from these fighters, Lou." LOU: "I guess not, Tom. Looks like some of them don't know their own strength, either. They'll have plenty more chance to learn by the end of the competition!" TOM: "And with that in mind, let's move on to the next round of the bracket!" (Continued in next post!)