Match of the Millennium

In a ceremony held at the International Fighting Festival's Southtown Mall gazebo, the opponents for the first round of NFG matches have been drawn! We've asked professional fighting commentators 'Loverboy' Lou Harris and Tom 'The Moustache Guy' Bradley to give us our thoughts on these matchups! JOHN DOE versus HAWKSLEY TOM: "Looks like we're starting off with a bang, especially with the fiery Irish brawler on the red side of this match!" LOU: "I don't think you should count John Doe out, though. You can tell this guy's a real ladies' man. Just check out that swagger!" TOM: "Do you mean swagger, or stagger?" COCO versus AYALA LOU: "Now, this is more like it! Party Girl versus Cave Babe in a contest to see which one can kick the highest!" TOM: "Careful, Lou. Your doctor warned you about getting too excited. Besides, these ladies have a lot more going for them than partying in caves and kicking high!" LOU: "Well, if you want an analyst's approach, I got fifty bucks that says Cave Lady whoops up on the Fair Lady of London." TOM: "That's an analyst's approach?" LOU: "Well, yeah. She's like three inches taller and fights like an animal. And I hear Party Girl couldn't stand to hurt animals." (Continued in the following post!)

DJAMILA versus ICHIKA TOM: "I'm not sure we can let you near this one, Lou." LOU: "Why? Because it's a fight between a blind stripper and an underage schoolgirl samurai?" TOM: "...Yes." LOU: "Why don't you take a crack at it then?" TOM: "..." LOU: "What's the matter?" TOM: "...Let's just see what happens. Next?" AMBER versus NURSE SAYURI LOU: "You know what the best part of this match is?" TOM: "I'm afraid to know what you think the best part of this match is." LOU: "It's that the lady in the cheerleader costume is a cheerleader in real life and the lady in the nurse costume is a registered nurse. Normally, you only get this kinda thing in novelty matches." TOM: "So, you're saying it's good that women are being empowered through representation and celebration of their expertise instead of sexy dressup?" LOU: "As well as, Tom, not instead of." (Continued in the following post!)

NIXIE versus BUFORD TOM: "You know, we haven't actually been making much commentary on the fighters themselves." LOU: "Are you checking the chat mid-broadcast again?" TOM: "Actually, I was trying to look up where Buford got his hat from and I noticed the window flashing." LOU: "Well, don't leave me hangin'. How do I compare a green goblin chick with a dude from the Prairies that thinks he's a samurai?" TOM: "It's the Battle of the Food Court. Barista versus Mall Samurai!" LOU: "Personally, my money's on the one with the explosives." BRIAN STORM versus ISAMU TOM: "You should be in your element here, Lou. An actual match between two wrestlers!" LOU: "It's true that I've commentated on wrestlers in thongs grappling with ones with beautiful flowing hair before, but not under these circumstances." TOM: "Well, who do you think will win? The high flying hardcore or the giant sumo?" LOU: "I predict the Storm kid's gonna end up flat as a pancake, if he doesn't knock himself out first." (Continued in the following post!)

CHEVY versus TAMAKI TOM: "Well, Lou, which do you prefer? Chevy or Tamaki?" LOU: "I'm more of a Ford guy, Tom. Wait, which one are we sponsored by?" TOM: "I'm talking about the fighters in our next match, Lou!" LOU: "Oh, right. Well, you're basically asking me to pick who would win between an armed American farm girl and a drunk raccoon. Need I say more?" GENIE versus KENZO TOM: "Well, here's an interesting matchup. A Japanese engineer against a Swiss psychic." LOU: "Wait, I thought there was a genie involved?" TOM: "No, that's just her name. She's the Swiss psychic!" LOU: "Well, there goes my joke about three wishes." TOM: "It's probably for the best." (OOC Information in the following post!)

First off, thanks to everyone who signed up! The bracket has been filled out and will progress as the tournament does. Characters who are eliminated from the tournament after completing their matches on time will have the option to participate in bonus content, and there will be a third place match in the final round, so stay tuned even if you're knocked out! DKO results will be determined based on which character was at a lower final health. NPCs have been added to fill the bracket out to a full 16. These NPCs are also R1.0 and will be competing off-screen with each other in round 1 and be temped as minions from round 2 onwards. They may recur throughout the course of NFG for plot purposes. IC Interview questions have been distributed to all of our NFG contestants. Look forward to these being released as they're returned! All matches for this tournament may use the International Fighting Festival stage unless otherwise specified! Matches are due for WEDNESDAY, APRIL 19TH. Be sure to get in touch with your opponent ASAP! If you don't think your match will be completed on time, one player may contact Pringer X to opt to forfeit. This will allow you to participate in the bonus round. Discuss this option with your opponent first if possible. If you haven't begun or scheduled your match by Sunday, April 16th, then you will need to contact Pringer X. SEE THE BRACKET HERE: https://challonge.com/nfgfightfest2023