Description: Briefly resting while scouring Southtown for his missing master, Hotaru - Kentou stops by the Futaba Estate. He also meets with Frei, whom struggles in the aftermath of his capture to fully come to grips with what he had lost. Do we deserve in kind what we inflict upon the world?
Late afternoon. It's quiet, and through the windows of the dojo the sun makes hazy rectangular patterns on the floor, patterns that will soon be erased as night falls and the torch-like lights get turned on. Normally, the Futaba estate's dojo is a place for contemplation and practice; right now, it's serving as partially converted space for refugees. A good 20% of the floor is cordoned off with folding screens to conceal rows of bedrolls for people to sleep on... but this is a place that needs to be defended, and leaving practice space for the fighters doing the defending is important. Thus a non-trivial portion of the space has been left as clear dojo floor. The people who sleep in here are, right now, out in the garden, enjoying what little tranquility can be found in this surprisingly war-torn age. But can there really be peace knowing that so much violence is so close at hand?
Frei knows how hard it is to find peace; his legendary calm in the face of adversity is a product of a lifelong grappling with the need for inner peace. He doesn't deny his demons and he doesn't deny his doubts; he accepts them, and moves on. For all his flaws it is his greatest redeeming feature. And right now, he's wishing he could remember how to do it.
Finally, he's changed out of the clothes that Alma and Kentou dragged him here in; right now, he's wearing a dark green tank top that's a little too big for him, and black cotton pants with legs that flare toward the ankle. No shoes, and as of yet, the dark auburn of his hair has yet to return; instead, his head is crowned with dull white instead. On his forehead, beads of perspiration show, clearly from physical effort. At this moment, he appears almost to be frozen in tableau; one leg, one fist extended, palm out, staring straight ahead. It's like he was delivering a punch and then got lost in time, somehow... not moving, not talking. If it weren't for the in and out of his chest as he tries to regulate his breathing, he'd almost be a statue.
After a moment, however, he goes into sudden motion. It's not explosive; it's as if there was momentum built up behind his stillness, like a dammed river, that suddenly starts to flow again, uninterrupted. The hand comes back into place, moving down to his side as another leg comes up in a standard high kick, which he holds for a moment at the apex before bringing his leg down and, seemingly, freezing again.
After another pause, however, the whole thing collapses, in a way; his body moves from fighting stance to simply standing in a way that can only be described as 'crumpling', and his head bows forward, looking at the floor; long white bangs fall into his eyes, obscuring his gaze from view. He says nothing, the chirping of summer crickets in the garden the only sound, apart from his breathing.
Youthful feet touch down on verdant grass all but soundlessly. Kentou finishes the landing in a tight roll, having lept high and over the Futaba estate fencing surrounding these immaculate gardens. With labored huffs, only then does the boy collapse onto the lawn. Propping himself up, crab-like on his behind, he stares skywards as he just drags air into his tortured lungs. Sweat pouring over his brow, his Chinese uniform in dishevel upon his slender frame.
He has been running for miles. Virtually a marathon's worth, as he does every day. Every day that Hotaru has been missing.
Only here, in the confines of this Estate, does Kentou ever rest. Forced to concede to the limitations of human endurance, the boy takes these few hours of succor. Food, water, a little sleep.
Only then, he goes out again. Endlessly searching, endlessly racing. Orbiting the invasion forces, looking for any sign. The smallest clue. Here and there, in his ceaseless operation, he's encountered the enemy or people in desperate need of help. Though it's slowed him down, he's never denied assistance wherever it was required.
Hotaru and Frei, both, had taught him well.
Once the boy collects himself enough to avoid hyperventilating, he then flops completely backwards. Arms and legs akimbo on the grass, his head rolling 'upwards' towards the Dojo proper and the dozens of smaller tents and cots set up around the encampment.
So odd to see. For almost an entire year, Kentou and Hotaru both had this incredible dojo to themselves. Such a beautiful place. He had gotten used to its lonely, deserted confines. Seeing so many people, especially suffering refugees, swarming the place is... He has yet to get used to the image.
Such contemplations are outside of his concerns right now... Kentou has barely enough time to breathe. Every moment he doesn't spend looking for Hotaru tastes like betrayal. Considering what happened to Frei ... Every moment she goes unrescued could make her situation yet worse.
..Frei.
Kentou's mousy eyes snap to attention, spying the upside-down image of his former Instructor. The young man looks... Broken. The boy knew something was wrong, especially the way he acted during that horrible fight. The bleaching of his hair bodes ill, Kentou can guess that much. Concern vexes the boy's expression as he slowly rolls up and onto his knees.
"..Frei?" Kentou calls out to him now, his voice managing to be reasonably steady if yet winded. Hands absently brushing the sweat from his brow and cheeks as he rises, one foot after the other.
That Hotaru's apprentice feels bad for the Monk is an understatement. So many things to ask ... So many things to say ... And this isn't the right time for any of them. But regardless, in the here and now, the boy can only pray the man is alright.
Something in Frei's expression though.. Something awful...
For a moment all Frei can see is the palm of his hand. It's a curious little contained universe; the sound of his breathing amplified by breaking against his hand; his vision contained to the red-outlined figures of his fingers, the scent of his own sweat on his skin. Briefly, he's in his own little world, contemplating only that. He misses Kentou coming over the wall, focused as he is, and it isn't until his name is called that he even thinks to snap out of it, hand coming slowly down as his head comes back up and he turns right, then left, looking for the source of the sound. He eventually finds it in the young and bright features of the student he shares with this estate's owner... features marred by concern and, perhaps, even fear.
Green eyes widen a little bit as his mind replays, unbidden, the events of last week across his vision: harsh words and harsher deeds toward Kentou and Alma both, striking out with his voice and with the artificially amplified chi energy at his fingertips, a power spiralling out of control until the emerald green voice beloning to Kentou cut through the cacophony.
It was an explosion of sound that ended with a silence that persists even now.
"Heya, kiddo," he says in a warm tone. If he's still messed up, it doesn't show for the moment. Frei's gaze goes unfocused for a second as he glances at Kentou; it's as if he's looking not at but through him, until that moment passes. He finally seems to realize that he's exhausted and sweaty and, rather unceremoniously, eases himself to the ground and has a seat, leaning backwards on his hands as he places them palm-down on the smooth wooden floor. "Glad to see you're doing alright."
The instructor's blank expression is worrisome.
Frei is many things, but the Monk is always expressive hardly without fail. Sometimes he may be given to distance and deep contemplation, but there's something different about this. A dreadful suspense bordering upon the autistic, as if Frei isn't quite all 'there'. At least, less 'there' than he was before.
That Frei acknowledges him and responds warmly, relieves Kentou visibly. His expression softening as he begins approaching the monk as he finds seating. Hands brushing the grass from his backside as his feet trod upon the soft lawn. "Hey.. Oh? Me.. Pfft!"
At the notion of Kentou's wellness, the boy waves a hand dismissively. Who cares about him? Kentou is a picture of health! For the moment.. anyway. "Just fine but.." The apprentice's voice trails.
Crouching down at the edge of the dojo's outer dais, Kentou looks Frei at eye level. Biting his lower lip for a moment, mousy gaze searches Frei's own. Uncertain how to proceed. Uncertain of what to say.
What can be said?
That Frei is alive and seemingly well is more than enough for Kentou to be happy. But.. Kentou may be naive on several matters, but even he knows this whole experience must have shaken the Monk to his very core. At the very least.
"I.. um." Beginning to venture, if only because five seconds of silence proves to be intolerably uncomfortable. Eyes drifting downwards to the polished wooden floor, "... I'm sorry that.. Uh.." Several versions of that sentence play out behind Kentou's eyes. They trip over one another as his scattered thoughts shoot them down one after the other. In the end, all he's left with is,
"...I.. I'm sorry.. About what happened.."
HE is sorry. He, Kentou, is sorry. For what happened *to Frei*.
It is clear from the look on his face that those words alone, that single sentence, verges on enough to make Frei's resolve shatter.
Green eyes stare at the youth dumbfoundedly, as if he can't even believe what he just heard, probably because he CAN'T. This young man -- and indeed, though Frei himself doesn't put much stock in the title of 'man', Kentou is a man in deed and belief if not, say, stature -- who sacrificed so much and risked, among other things, his life... to hear him say that HE is sorry for what happened to FREI... is phenomenally insane. For a long moment he simply stares, without words, trying to process and failing entirely. But the silence is as awkward for him as it was for Kentou, and after too long, he finally speaks, even if it's just to fill the silence... a phenomenon he's becoming all too familiar with, lately. "A sound you don't hear until it's gone" is an interestingly exact metaphor.
"You... are very kind, Kentou," Frei says at last, with a smile that is both proud and... relieved? Or grateful, perhaps. A little of both. "I'd apologize to you but I don't even know... I wouldn't even know where to start. I'll never really be able to make amends for what happened." Blinking a moment or two, he looks down at his hands, much as he did speaking with Shurui a mere few days ago. "I won't pretend it wasn't... me... though. No matter the reason, I still did all those things."
Decrying the philosophies of Alma and Kentou. Berating Mizuki, lashing out at all three with attacks that carried killing intent rather than merely using his skills for self-defense. A side of himself that he didn't know existed, let alone could take the proverbial wheel. And, somewhere deep inside, he can feel the fiery current of Seth's 'gift' still circulating.
Another pause, shorter this time.
Frei tilts his head back, and looks at the ceiling curiously. "Do you... do you believe in karma, Kentou?" he asks, suddenly.
It does not even occur to Kentou to blame Frei. That idea doesn't start to cross his mind.
How could the boy? kentou knows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Frei was not in control of his faculties back then. They ... Did something to him. Some kind of brainwashing ... Something. Something that made him go insane. Even that strange woman said he was out of control. Of any control.
Only Alma, through his strange, unknowable powers, was able to shatter Frei's madness and bring him back.
But the cost...
At Frei's gratitude, Kentou smiles gently. Eyes drifting to the finished deck a moment, droplets of sweat still rolling down his chin.
Again with the apologies..
"Its... No Frei." Kentou gestures weakly, trying to physically fend off this false idea that Frei owes him anything in the slightest. Be it thanks or apology, either. "No. You can't blame yourself for that. I mean... Look. I don't even know what those creeps did.. I can't even guess.. But I know you. Okay? I do." His sepia eyes move upwards to reconnect with his Instructor. An earnestness lies there, as stalward as a mountain, "That wasn't you. Maybe.. Maybe pieces of you they.. twisted around somehow. We all have.. bits and pieces like that.. I think." A shrug, "But we're more... We're more than our 'bits and pieces'. You're more than... Whatever it was you said you were back there."
He reaches out to touch Frei's arm lightly, a firm nod, "I know you are." Not even the slightest hint of suspicion or dishonesty exists in Kentou's eyes. Such things do not exist in him. He means what he says at all times, both to his credit and to his fault.
Mostly because he's a terrible liar.
Though, there is more to say on accountability for this mess. For Frei being IN this mess. ... But the boy instead answers Frei's lingering question, "I do. Of course." Nodding to that without much hesitation at all. Curious eyes following him, thoughts already processing how Frei must think this applies to him, but he lets the monk speak his peace.
That catches Frei by surprise, and it's only because of the suddenness of his eyes opening, turned toward the ceiling as they still are, that it becomes aparent they were closed at all. Slowly, the white-haired head turns down to Kentou, and he doesn't seem disappointed or sad, just genuinely surprised.
For a moment, Frei's green eyes drift down to the side, and he purses his lips before continuing, clearly choosing his words carefully. "I don't, actually. Karma... well, it's an attractive idea. Good things happen to people who do good things, and vice versa. But... it always seemed to me like it turned the universe, and morality, into a giant revenge scheme. Making it all about retribution."
Again, his head tilts up, as if he's addressing the heavens as much as he's addressing Kentou. "I mean, it makes sense that your actions set the tone for what happens to you, especially dealing with other people. But karma... it's actually a very fear-based way of thinking. You probably don't know about him, but there's a French scholar named Michel Foucault who talked about the perfect prison." His head comes down, and Frei makes gestures with his hands as he describes. "A ring of cells surrounding a tower with guards. It was perfect, he said, because the prisoners got used to being watched. So eventually you could remove the guards and the prisoners would watch *themselves*, out of fear." A pause, and Frei brings his hands down. "I think karma is like that. Maybe not so... mean-spirited. I think the people who came up with it wanted people to be good to each other, and that's not wrong. But in the end it's all about fear of what you do coming back to you."
There's a moment while Frei seems to digest what he just said, as if hearing himself say it wasn't the same as the words forming in his head as he said it. Like the words came from somewhere else. He leans forward, his arms crossed in front of his stomach, head tilted toward the floor. "You're right about... bits and pieces. Everyone has a dark side. But I think it's cowardly to say, 'well it wasn't the real me'. You have to admit that it was a part of yourself because otherwise, you're trying to pretend that real things that happened were all an illusion." He turns back to Kentou with a faint smile, though it's... an embarrassed sort of look too. "And that's unfair."
He then turns away again, but THIS time he looks up at the windows, and out... presumably, in his mind's eye, toward the city beyond. "I guess it's things like that which make me wonder about my beliefs about karma. Whatever the reason, I did some awful things. Now I'm paying for it."
Color Kentou perplexed. Somehow, he had thought Frei would be the sort who'd believe pretty deeply in karma. Or at least, Kentou's pedestrian understanding of the concept. The youth blinks once, but continues listening. Curious to hear the rationale behind this denial of a fairly fundamental idea of morality.
As it ventures into European scholars well... Kentou tries his best to look like he's paying attention. Honestly shaking his head in compliance with the idea that this is entirely news to him.
Long moments pass as the boy processes Frei's wisdom several times over. Squinting as he imagines these prisoners and these guards ... Not quite able to make the leap about why the prisoners would just watch each-other, "But.. Why wouldn't they just... You know, make a run for it the moment the guards were gone? I don't.. uh.."
Sadly. Kentou isn't quite the advanced philosophy student as yet. Eitherway, the details are neither here nor there. The broad strokes of the argument is understandable.
"Huh.." Kentou admits. He never really thought of karma like 'revenge' precisely. Its more like... A force of nature. After all, is gravity based on vengeance? The ground avenging itself upon things in flight?
Though, that Frei suggests his current ... circumstances is somehow related to his going insane outside of his control?
"You don't deserve this!" Kentou blurts out with surprising force. Frowing deeply as he glares at his former instructor. Letting that sentiment settle a moment before adding, his finger pointing indicatively, "What those jerks did to you DID do this to you. It was -THEM-. Not you. All you tried to do was protect people! ... Protect ME." The boy emphasizes that point.
No, it isn't lost on Kentou that he was one of the injured fighters upstairs when SIN attacked the estate. If it wasn't for Frei, Hotaru and the others putting up a defense.. They would have done to Kentou, what they did to Frei and ... Hotaru.
If it wasn't for Frei and Hotaru, Kentou would be some lab rat somewhat and turned into... Who knows what. There is no way Kentou will allow Frei to believe this to be a negative thing.
"Don't punish yourself for doing the right thing. You're suffering because..." A breath, "... So that other people wouldn't. You... Got in the way of those monsters. You risked everything.. You paid.. A lot. Don't even begin.. Don't EVEN! Don't let those jerks make you think it was anything OTHER than their fault!"
Kentou's vehemence takes the older fighter aback, a bit; Frei's always understood the youth to be a creature of passions and emotional intensity, but usually not directed *at him*. Instead it's always been in the abstract, somehow... pointed outwards at the world, at something unfair, or exciting. To find that gun suddenly pointed at him -- though in an encouraging and not castigating way -- gives him pause, regardless. Green eyes widen a bit with surprise; his lips part a bit, but he doesn't say anything, letting young Ondori get everything off his chest.
In the end, he's forced to smile, the encouraging if somewhat... soppy, or perhaps sheepish, smile that Frei frequently gets in Kentou's presence, when the young fighter has totally disarmed his defenses with his straightforward and moral view of the world... something that, the YFCC instructor suddenly realizes, is a quality a certain other individual seems to possess.
The thought makes him chuckle.
Reaching out a hand, he exercises his right to muss Kentou's hair, earned on the first day of tutelage when Hotaru delivered her young protege to the YFCC. It is a right he will continue to exercise, too, in the future. "Foucault's point was that the prisoners would be so afraid that they'd... become their own guards. I know it seems strange. He meant that what other people think of us can sometimes turn into a cage in our own heads. The *fear* of something happening can prevent us from acting."
Turning away, he locks his fingers together and pushes outwards, stretching with the connected arc of his hands and closing his eyes shut for a second. "Whether I deserve it or not... haha, you might be right that I'm not sure I DESERVE it. And they... whoever they are. Shurui called them 'Shadaloo'," he adds, rolling the name out for the first time. People he hasn't heard about, but which now... he can dimly put a feel to. "They did do something that changed me. That's true. But thinking it's their fault... that just locks me into that feeling of retribution, you know?" he says finally, turning to Kentou. "I guess that's maybe my problem with it. That it says their bad karma has to be repaid, or even that this is a result of *my* bad karma. I'd rather... I'd rather think that these are things that happened. And there's been consequences, and now I have to deal with them. So do you. But tracing blame, wanting retribution... in the end, I don't like it."
He's never really thought of karma as a force. It may be that because Frei considers personal freedom the highest moral good, that the idea of karma is simply too... untenable. Whereas to Kentou, it's a universal law that transcends petty human concerns like morality. Perhaps they're both right, a little.
"Still..." Frei adds, finally, bowing his head a little. "I didn't expect..." He pauses, then sighs and breathes out sharply and for a while, through his nose, bringing a hand up to run through his bangs. "It's harder than I thought it would be... not hearing or feeling it anymore. It's hard to stay circumspect when I feel like I'm so out of balance."
On the subject of being disarmed! As Kentou's hair is mussed the boy squacks, hands swiftly sweeping upwards in a vain bid to re-straighten that long mess into a close approximation of the way it was before. The youth's intense look is thusly diminished to more of a hardened pout, but at least he's momentarily ceased his assault on Frei's self-incrimination. Kentou does listen, however, to the further explanation of this Frenchman's philosophy. The last bit however, begins to approximate something that makes sense. Its something that Kentou has felt first-hand.
That fear can limit you. That's an idea that he's butted up against on several occasions. Fighting Blanka ... Charging Zero. The boy likes to think he'd managed to conquer such terror. Ultimately ... Maybe its more like, learning to live with fear. Fear is always there, lingering under the surface.
Regardless, as a name is finally attached to this onslaught, Kentou nods slightly. He's never heard of the thing, not terribly sure he wants to know more about them. Beyond figuring out how they'll be ran out of town for all this.. Mayhem. There's an awful lot of questions attached to this terrible, unfolding event. The whys and wherefores are almost... Immaterial to him now. All he knows is that those who are dear to him have been tortured or worse. All he wants now... Is for it to stop and leave them alone.
At the notion of meting out consequences to this Shadaloo, The boy's eyes drift downwards once more.
Seeking revenge is ... Not something that's really occured to him. As far as he's concerned, finding Hotaru is everything at this point.
If Hotaru was ... If something happened to her... Something terrible.
....Maybe then. But until such time as that, Kentou just wants peace. There's really no end to the revenge thing, no point to it. All that matters is keeping loved ones from behind hurt. Going beyond that is ... Well there's no reason to.
"Nah. Revenge is ... Different. I mean.. I do think Karma catches up with us. With everyone. Sooner or later. As long as we do things.. you know.. The right way. Then I don't think we have to worry about it. In the long run.. I mean." Which sums up Kentou's modest feeling on that.
The matter of Frei's 'chi-blindness' though... That's something different. Kentou has been in and out over the last day or two. While he's never had time to really sit and talk with Frei about it, he's known.. Roughly what has happened.
Kentou can't even imagine what it would be like. To have such a ... Tremendous and wonderful gift. Only to have it taken away. Its like.. Shattering something priceless. The boy is happy Frei is alive, ultimately. That's the most important part, all told.
But to lose something so precious.. So self-defining...
Kentou's lips press tight. Regret etches his features, ".. Its.. Temporary... Right? I mean.. If you work at it you'll... get it all back... Right?"
There is hope. There's always hope...
He's only giving voice to a hope that Frei -- who is, all told, a surprisingly realistic person for being such a... well, spacecase now and then -- has not dared express just yet. For that, the YFCC instructor can't feel anything but a combination of gratitude and sadness. Shurui claimed that he'd simply burned himself out, used up his reserves... and certainly, the prototype S.I.N drug still raging, quietly, in his system seems to encourage that theory. But what he tried to express to her in the kitchen a scant few days ago was that the power he typically wielded never 'belonged' to him; it was something he borrowed from the very air, pulled from the living planet itself. Shaped, not created. Physics calls it the law of conservation of energy and as fantastic and chaotic a system nature is, even spiritual things like chi adhere to it. Creation means giving something up, but shaping... shaping is possible. There are rules.
Like karma.
But to Frei it's more as if he were at ground zero of a tremendously bright, tremendously loud explosion. It's not that the chi isn't *there*; it clearly is. He's alive, the world is as it was. It's that Frei can't perceive it anymore. It makes sound he doesn't hear and light he doesn't see. It's a theory he can't bring himself to tell Kentou, however, because Shurui's read on the scenario is full of hope. All things renew in time. But Frei's take on the scenario is... if not without hope, then certainly less so. It may be permanent.
In the end, he opts for honesty. "I don't really know," Frei admits. "I don't have a frame of reference to understand it. It's... very confusing." The white-haired fighter's thoughts stray, momentarily, to his old master... a man now gone, who taught Frei nearly everything he knows. Who was responsible for setting him on his path. Would he know what to do? Realizing he's been delivering all this while looking into the distance, he turns back to Kentou and tries to give a reassuring smile. "But I'm choosing not to worry about a future I can't predict," he says at last. "I have to believe everything will work out, and tackle the problems that are in front of me." He brings up his hand, palm inward, fingers curled slightly, and glances at it. "Shurui was careful to say that. Even without those skills, I can still fight. I can still do *something*. So for now, that's what I'm going to do. We'll find Hotaru, we'll get everyone back together. We'll figure something out." He turns back to Kentou and now, however, his smile is a little more genuine. "Tomorrow is another day. If you keep that thought in your head, Kentou, nothing in life can ever really keep you down."
Yet still, somewhere in Frei's heart, he's giving in to the fear he just talked about, at least a little bit. A part of him that says, what use are you *now*? You couldn't even defend yourself and Ichiro from that tank, and as a result he was... brainwashed. Damaged. He hurt his friends, he lost his powers, perhaps forever. He made the world that much worse a place.
An image of Hotaru on the church steps not far from here comes to mind, and his own words suddenly haunt him: 'The happiness of tomorrow is built on the pain of today'. Suffering now isn't always a bad thing... and the universe doesn't exist solely to punish people.
If there is such a law as karma, then truly it must exist beyond human comprehensions of 'good' and 'evil'. Perhaps all karma REALLY is, is linear time. Actions create consequences; consequences create more actions. Like the elements, an eternal and unbroken cycle.
"You may be right about karma," Frei says at last, mulling that over. "I might quibble over the meaning of 'the right way', but you're probably right. Eventually, what we do catches up with us."
Kentou knows there's no way the boy can fully appreciate what it was that Frei had lost.
The ability to experience chi ... Kentou only has a basic understanding of it. While, the boy may be one of the extraordinary few with the capability and talent to cultivate this living force into a visual and forceful effect ... Compared to Frei he's a neophyte. He may never truly understand or sense this power as distinctly as Frei was able.
As such, Kentou can't help but feel disingenuous for telling Frei it'll be 'okay'. How can you comfort someone when you have no complete appreciation for what it was they lost? Only the most vague knowledge that it was ... incalculably wonderful.
How can you comfort a blind man when you, yourself, have never seen?
Kentou looks upon Frei with distant helplessness. Clearly sad for him, but unable to voice it beyond his small, earlier attempts.
The monk's attempt to focus on the few things he can control earn a solemn nod. "Right. Right." Kentou hastily and ardently agrees. The wisdom of dealing with what you have, rather than brooding over what you lost, is sagely. That sounds more like the Frei he knows! The encouragement earns a smile from the boy.
The name 'Shurui' rings a bell, but Kentou has never actually met her. Hotaru recently took her under her wing, he thinks. Something to do with Kadish. The particulars he never figured out as ... Well ... The invasion happened promptly after she came to live here. If Frei looks to her for advice, then she has to be a pretty smart cookie! He'll have to meet her sometime.. Under better circumstances, he hopes.
Regardless, the boy's encouragement evolves into a bright grin. Even without Chi, Frei is a high level martial artist! Weakened he may be, but the boy would never call him crippled. "Hai, Frei! We'll get Hotaru-sensei back, we will!"
Tomorrow is another day. But! There is plenty of day left in this afternoon. Words on finding his wayward Master remind Kentou that the clock is ticking. The boy should rest up some then get back to searching ASAP. He'd hate to leave Frei so soon ... But the greatest fears the youth had have been answered.
Frei will be okay. Come what may, no matter what. Frei will be just fine and will move on. That is all the boy could hope for, and sets his troubled mind at ease. At least, enough for him to now continue on with his search.
"I.. I need to get going.." Kentou murmurs apologetically. Straightening from his crouch at last, hopping from foot to foot to work the circulation back into his legs. Breathing a bit more deeply and swiftly, "..I need to go back out there and look for her.. I'm going to go get something to eat and drink real fast before I do.. Um.." Beginning to step towards the house proper, gesturing in that direction, "..Do you want anything.. or?" Figuring he can fetch something for the Monk before he heads on. Plenty of daylight left to search.
And, as Frei confesses the boy might be right on the subject of Karma. He only grins as bright as he can, "Hee!" See, Kentou can be sagely too! ... S.. Sometimes.
The fact that he's about to get up and get back out there says, to Frei, that Kentou understands. In fact, it's the nice thing about being young, the older fighter muses. You're invincible. Your whole life is ahead of you. It's easy to remember that tomorrow is another day when you live for that tomorrow... when the prospect of what's going to happen next is exciting and new, when you don't know everything but you THINK that you do.
If only for a little bit, being in Kentou's presence has given Frei a chance to 'borrow' that feeling, for which he finds himself very grateful.
He stands up too, at last, though it's in a much more sleepy way, and indeed, his arms make a rough V in the air as he unfolds upwards and grits his teeth. It's 50% stretch and 50% yawn; the ache in his muscles reminds him that he just spent a whole day training, and thinking on the problem. It was hard work, which somewhat lazy Frei isn't used to... but it's work he's going to engage in. Not because he 'owes' anyone anything, but because it's 'the right way', as Kentou put it, to engage his karma.
All you can ever be is yourself, as hard as possible.
"No, I'll be alright. I want to work out some more." He pauses, and seems to be about to let Kentou go, when a thought comes into his head. Frei clears his throat, and then hopefully when Kentou turns back to him, gives him a surprisingly penetrating stare, green eyes bright with intensity.
"You should know..." Frei says, and then he falls silent. He's not given to overemotional displays, not usually, other than perhaps exuberant happiness or silly behavior. But he does swallow, and for a second his eyes shut, lids fluttering with the tension of it, before he speaks again. "The last thing I 'saw' or 'heard', Kentou... was green. I wanted you... to know that. Alma's powers... he made a path for you to walk, but you had to walk it. Even if I never 'see' or 'hear' anything again... I can be gratified that what you did was my last memory."
The boy nods to Frei's dismissal. Offering a lingering smile as he begins to turn away in full, heading to the house and the rationed food supplies therein.
That is, before Frei's gaze catches him. The intensity of that look forces the boy to stop. Feet dragging to a halt as he slowly looks over his shoulder quizzically. "..Frei?" Is something wrong - He asks without speaking.
And then, Frei goes and says a thing like that.
For a moment, the youth just freezes like a deer caught in headlights. "I.." His knee-jerk answer would be to dismiss the depth of what the boy did. It was Alma, not him. Alma is the one who should be thanked! But that look stows his protestations behind his lips. A sincerity to those words the boy finds uncomfortably humbling.
Kentou honestly doesn't know how to respond. He doesn't think he did anything ... Anybody else wouldn't have done. But even more importantly ... That Frei's last experience in that realm was Kentou's own power, the very power Frei helped him find, AND that it meant that much to him...
Maybe nothing should be said.
"... I guess.. It was Karma."
The youth mentions at last, unthinkingly as a brilliant smile reclaims his expression.
Frei gave the green to the boy, and Kentou used it to save him in turn. Beauty for beauty. The circle was fulfilled.
At that, Kentou then turns and heads towards the mansion proper. Leaving Frei in this idyllic paradise of meditation and repose.
Log created on 01:49:21 04/26/2009 by Kentou, and last modified on 13:28:14 04/27/2009.