Description: YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS. I mean zombies, Freddy, a shogun and .. GUNS. AND THEN MONSTER TRUCKS HELL YEAH. (Winner: Choi)
LAST TIME... at the Mall. There was a fight for a man's treasure. It ended with victory, but barely. A grasp .. of defeat.
This time? FREAKING ZOMBIES WITH UNDEAD MONSTER TRUCKS.
There is something that both makes him proud and drives the VERY FEAR deep into his heart. He stands now with a bunch of pansy cars... surrounded by a veritable swarm of Zombie trucks that are currently DESTROYING THE COUNTRYSIDE. There is nothing left, truly, to mention but that. The very thought in ITSELF is terrible. But instead of the countryside they seem to be limited to this parking lot. Where he is.
THIS ITSELF is terrible because THIS IS THE WORLD of the Shogun for now.
"HAHAHAH.. Ha... Yes you .. ZOMBIES!" The Shogun holds his wakizashi close. "Your cars .. they uh TRUCKS they DO NOT SCARE THE SHOGUN!" The engines rev. "NO! What power .. how can I defeat these zombie trucks.. If I only had my own... THEN THEY SHALL LEARN TO FEAR!" The honking of one drives him to fall back, before yelling, flailing swords in the air, and throwing a single sharp small object at a tire.
It BOUNCES OFF.
"Know this .. I WILL DEAL WITH YOU YET!"
Unfortunately you know the Shogun is just .. there. AND HE'S NOT ALONE.
"... And so that's why my wife and I decided not to have any kids. So how about you?"
Choi slipped his arm around the 'corpses' shoulder. The woman, eyes glazed over, groans weakly. The midget grins, his makeup stretching his already grotesque features. Yes, Choi was going to this SNF as Freddy Krueger. With the fedora and a red and black sweater, his outfit was already pretty much set. The trick was the face makeup. And that was something that the staff could readily supply.
However, right now, Choi was less focused on the Monster Truck Zombiefest and more on HIS monster truck's work in the garage. Or a garage. The Korean giggles. "Well, baby, I heard dead girls can't say no..." He began, closing in...
"Excuse me, sir, no. I really need to get back to work. But no. Please. No." The woman zombie stands up, knocking Choi's arm away. And with that, she walks back in her 18-wheeler, leaving the midget to watch stupidly up.
Hmph. Talk about getting stiffed.
Kerian mentally was really starting to wonder about his own sanity these days.
First, he gets tied up into this insane zombie event. Then, when he's told he has to dress up, a Sephiroth costume is pushed on him, his trusty gun is taken away, and he's left with a stupid-looking sword way too long for a normal human being to wield, let alone someone who was a specialist with handguns. Finally, just to add insult to injury, he'd found out that this would be televised.
A normal man in his position would probably have put up a fight or argued or done something in relation to this madness. But Kerian? He'd managed to stammer out some befuddled English, then was whisked into the changing room.
To his credit, he really -does- look like Sephiroth. The eyes are the wrong color, perhaps, and the trenchcoat's a little big on him, but the hair, the face, all the rest of it, spot-on.
The shirtless bit was getting to him, though.
He glances around at the mall briefly, trying to find some form of weapon that wasn't ridiculously oversized, and clenches his hand around the (suspectedly toy) sword.
"Why do I let myself get talked into this..." He murmurs. "Ah well...too late to back out now." With that, he swings the stupidly long sword around, bringing it into his free hand in what he assumes might be something like a combat pose, and looks terribly, terribly awkward.
Still. It'd have to do.
Katana looks over, noticing Choi and how he is busy dealing with a woman, a corpse, and ... what. The Shogun is wearing his normal Shoguny outfit, EXCEPT DIFFERENT. For this time, KATANA WAS A NEW SHOGUN. He was not just the SHOGUN. He was the EMPEROR OF JAPAN. Signs stick out of his back, and cling to it. Not only that, but the Shogun is dressed in only the BEST fake REAL JAPAN KIMONOS AND CLOTHINGS.
What he's not using the real stuff when it's going to be torn apart COME ON.
But the Shogun looks onto Choi, FREDDY B., and then Choi gets stiffed. By a zombie female. "HAAAAAAAAAHAAHAAA!" The Shogun bellows in laughter. "So you still chase after women .. WHEN YOU CAN NEVER GET THEM!?" The Shogun is truly laughing. The irony is lost on him. "How .. pathetic! Even the dead have enough sense!"
Wait.
What is this.
Katana looks on. There is a trenchcoat. There is a sword. There is everything. And the BATTLE IS CALLED. "Can it be!?" The weeabo of time and space calls. "IS IT TRULY!?" The Shogun grows more excited, as swings the sword, and makes a COMBAT POSE.
"YOU BASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!" The Shogun calls out, as he charges for Kerian, with his TERRIBLE VIOLENCE. He is a running. OH HE IS A RUNNING. "I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!" But the Shogun has never met Kerian before. Not in this parking lot, where he has never been. Not as his sandals hit the ground.
"You .. Killed.. AERITHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" REMEMBER IT'S AREITH OR AERISU NOT AERIS.
He doesn't even put LOGIC into it he just charges forwards, blades leading the way, as the Shogun begins this battle.. THE WAY HE ALWAYS HAS. "YYAAAARGGGHHH!! ULTIMA CROSS METEO FINISHING BEAM BRAVER SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!" This is just Katana running forwards and swinging INCREDIBLY HARD with those blades.
UH OOOOOOH.
COMBATSYS: Katana has started a fight here.
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Katana 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Kerian has joined the fight here.
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Katana 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Kerian
COMBATSYS: Starscream has joined the fight here.
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Starscream 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Katana
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Kerian 0/-------/-------|
COMBATSYS: Choi has joined the fight here.
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Choi 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Kerian
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Choi 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Katana
[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ <
Kerian 0/-------/-------|
Hey.
Hey Katana.
That's cold man. Just cold.
As the woman starts up her engine, Choi feels that he will need a double injection system just to get back in swing. Worse, never-touched-a-girl-in-his-life-except-to-wrestle-and-no-poison-doesnt-count-it-didnt-matter-what-you-two-did-it-never-counted was making fun of the midget. Seething, the little man snaps around, eyeing the great warrior. Yes, he had fought Katana before. He remembered it quite clearly. The girl. The man. The weird fork in the store. And the garbage canned. The midget nodded furiously. Yes. It was all so clear now.
As the storm of trucks began to grow louder and louder, so came Choi. The Shogun was heading straight for... pretty boy? And what the hell was he yelling? And seriously. What was going on? The midget was getting confused by the rage of Shogun. Maybe he was jealous of Kerian's figure? Choi suspected that under all that costume wear, Katana was a fatty fat. Not a Chang fat. But a Cheng kind of fight.
Freddy smiled a warped smile as he picked up speed, keeping low while lengthening his strides. "Hey! 40-Year-Old Virgin!" The midget snarked loudly, leaping through the air at Katana. Already he began to arced up breaking into a spinning drill. Claws out, he swerved high up, attempting to RUIN KATANA'S mask as he shot up, up, and away into the air.
Like a Freddy Bird.
COMBATSYS: Starscream has joined the fight here.
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Choi 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Kerian
COMBATSYS: Kerian blocks Katana's Deep Strike.
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Choi 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/-------|==-----\-------\0 Kerian
Kerian barely has the time to parse out the lunatic SHOGUN EMPEROR OF JAPAN's words as the other man comes running at him. Somewhere, in that mass of white hair, he manages a single thought's worth of 'oh shit', and brings his ludicrously huge sword around to block the blow.
It was lucky, honestly, that he'd figured out a stopgap of chi's worth into the sword, as he's sent flying from the blow, thumping against the ground once, twice, three times, and rolling to a halt against...
A toy stand. An open-air toystand, with pinwheels, party noisemakers, and...
YES! Water guns!
He scrambles to his feet and grabs one of the waterguns in his free hand. NOW it was a fight, he thinks.
Kerian-roth charges at Katana, sword held erect for a stabbing blow to the other man's face...
...swung to the side at the last minute for a shot in the face. The little bolt of silvery-white chi soars out, concentrated into a bullet's worth of a point, and whizzing towards Katana like a death-laden missile...of...erm...death.
Alright, it doesn't make much sense, but Kerian's not really concerned about that. He slides the sword back up, ready to defend again.
This was absolutely idiotic. Still, on some level, he was enjoying himself.
And then the everpresent teen stalkers cheer, and he nearly facefaults.
Damn Fangirls.
COMBATSYS: Katana endures Kerian's Magnum Blast!
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Choi 0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/------=|===----\-------\0 Kerian
COMBATSYS: Katana interrupts Houkou Tenkan from Choi with Tengu Walking.
-* WILD HIT! *-
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Choi 0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/-----==|===----\-------\0 Kerian
Cold is nothing compared to what Katana will do WHEN HE GETS HIS.
Oh wait.
As Katana rushes towards the SEPHRIAN, the Shogun of EMPEROR JAPAN continues to charge in on Kerian. And yet, it's as the HUGE SWORD is struck into his way but ultimately, the Shogun ends up VICTORIOUS. "Ha.. HAHAHAH! This time, YOU SHALL NOT ESCAPE TO THE PLANET!" He cries, in full seriousness, before Kerian charges at HIM. The blast causes the Shogun to be assaulted by bullets, even as the sword comes in, the Shogun taking the blow of the bullets, moving with them.. as the sword is swung around.
Why does he take the bullets into his armor?
Choi. He yells, coming towards him, SNARKING. Leaping into the air the SHogun was assaulted by a spinning drill.. of a midget.
Knocked into the air by the bullets, the Shogun flips backwards, stuck in the air .. Choi passes by.. striking the Shogun's face slightly. "THIS IS IT! NEVER AGAIN!" And the wakizashi slam into the ground. And then .. he moves. The swords, precisely. Holding himself up by the wakizashi, Katana begins to SLASH AGAINST THE GROUND as he uses them like bladed feet, ripping terribly into Choi as the Shogun runs into, and nearly through, the midget, as he came close.
"TENGU WALKIIIIIIING!"
At the end, he flips back to his feet, blades pointed forwards. "Ha.. HA! HAHAHAHAH! THE SHOGUN PREVAILS..... You see... None .. SHALL DEFEAT ME IN THIS SACRED PLACE!" .. Of trucks.
Yes.
Choi's Palinisque policy of "Drill, Baby, Drill" was quickly rebuffed by the crazy eco-socialist nutjob policies of Katana. Like a giant union of whale and woman, he counters the Choi'Reilly Factor by running him over. With BLADES.
Run over by a Democratic majority, the midget is bowled under and over, but not knocked out. Being a little speed bump greatly helped with that. Though the cutting did not. Whimpering as blood mixed in with his make up, the burn wounds actually looked worse. Or better. Betterworse.
BORSE!
The Korean wetter situation started with a glare. But then, he saw something. Pretty boy. With the naked chest. "Hey, buddy boy. Like your dreams with men?" The little man began, grinning evilly. "Because I am aaaaaaaall man. And that's a nice naked chest you got there..." Choi squealed, dancing his claws around in both hands. "How about..." The little man started, stepping forward ever so slowly "... I run my hands... along IT!"
The squealing returned as Choi began to spin and spin, whirling like a top. Bright blue streaks of energy began to cut and form between the claws of the little man. Lifting slightly off the air, he drifted towards Kerian. If the lesser-Kefka got caught up in the Choinado, then he would be drawn up into the air with Choi. If he did not... well, Choi better react quickly to the counter attack.
COMBATSYS: Kerian dodges Choi's Tatsumaki Shippuu Zan.
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Choi 0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/-----==|===----\-------\0 Kerian
Kerian purses his lips, sliding out of the way of the Choinado quite nimbly despite the load of the weighted trenchcoat, heavy sword, toy gun, exaggeratedly long sheath, straps securing said weighted trenchcoat, shoulderpads, boots, and weighted pants. In fact, one really has to wonder about someone who can dodge that well weighed down that much.
His elbow slides up, and he swings the ridiculous sword awkwardly at Choi's stomach.
"Not really," He says calmly, "I rather prefer women. But if you're that desperate, maybe there's a corpse in the grave for you to...ahh, but you just got rejected by one, didn't you? Even the -dead- won't tough you." He smirks.
English accent, stupid costume, ridiculous sword attack, and a witty burn. It's a quadfecta of insulting - classy-sounding, dumb-looking, fight-mocking, and masculinity-breaking.
Painful.
It's as Katana watches both Choi and Kerian go at it that he certainly reflect on the FINER things in life. Like watching two people kill the HELL out of each other. Now THAT'S the stuff. But he can't for now.
"What the hell." Katana speaks, finally, hearing that Choi wishes to TOUCH KERIAN. "No NO WAY. YOU SHALL NEVER TOUCH HIM! HE'S EVIL!" The Shogun is only one to speak, y'know! "EVIL!" He chants it again to make sure. But it's as Choi spins .. and Kerian gets OUT of the spin, that catches the Shogun's eye. "Truly.. a fiend.. THAT SHALL BE DEALT WITH!"
Charging towards Kerian, as he swings the sword towards Choi, Katana comes from behind.. and, no matter what the swords affect it, attempt to grab the Kerinroth.
"This time .. YOU WILL BE VANQUISHED!" Really, the Shogun generally is stubborn but today seems like an amazing continuation of this all. The Shogun, having trampled towards Kerian, does his best to heft him into the air, and then leap.
Because what comes up must come POWERBOMBED DOWN.
"FALLING STAR SHOGUN SLAMMER! SHIIIYAAAAAAAAA!"
r
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHAAAA!"
"CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDO!"
WHY HAVE ONE LOUD BATTLE CRY WHEN YOU CAN HAVE THREE.
COMBATSYS: Choi dodges Kerian's Medium Strike.
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Choi 0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/-----==|===----\-------\0 Kerian
As Choi shot up in the air, he felt the shot against him graze his ears. The dead rejecting him. Jeeze. Was everyone out for him. Then another thought passed Choi mind as he broke from the top spin.
Mine's bigger.
Choi takes advantage of the length of Kerian's sword, in a way that you wouldn't think judging by the beginning of this paragraph. Whipping right over it, Choi flattened his body, aiming to land right on top of Kerian. Bringing his claws together like in prayer, it was as if he was ready to spike the fangirl's wet dream right in the head.
But then, a fanboy came from behind.
And not in that way, fangirls. Not in that way.
Katana's approach mixed him up, but not too much. As the Shogun when for the Pretty Boy, Choi went for the Wah-Nah-Bay. Swinging his claws downward, he attempted to give a double-rend right along the back of the Samurai.
Surely, all of the characters being in the exact same spot wouldn't be a problem, would it?
COMBATSYS: Katana successfully hits Kerian with Medium Throw.
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Choi 0/-------/----===|-------\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/----===|=======\-------\0 Kerian
Kerian, between the crazy gay guy and the crazy SHOGUN EMPEROR, is really at a loss for words as he's tossed by Katana into the sky and hurled backwards after Choi dodges the blade. He lands, bouncing once and smashing against two of the stands in an incredibly painful-looking barely-controlled fall.
The young Brit groans, pulling himself to his feet. The sword was still in his hand, but the toy gun's been dropped. So he does the next best thing.
He picks up a straw.
"Alright...let's try this again," he murmurs, sticking the straw on the end of the sword in perhaps the stupidest display of combat ever attempted. Ginyu-sensei was probably turning over in his grave.
"Shinsokuhou-Ryu Stopgap Technique," he murmurs in the direction of his handiwork, swinging the sword up to point at Katana.
It might be the most ridiculous thing in the world, but the shape of the blade was perfect now, the straw settled onto the twin channels along the blade...
And the chi he'd wisely channeled through the sword streams through the sword, into the straw...
It explodes in a shower of straw-ness-ness at the chi overload, but the sword-straw-beam...well, it functions. Sort of.
Unfortunately, Choi's new placement - coupled with the sorta-sexual assault - meant that the chi-blast was heading for him, not Katana.
Oh well. That's what he gets for trying to inspire yaoi fics.
Jerk.
As unholy battle is waged across the parking lot of the Southtown Mall, the zombies who had once been shambling about aimlessly amidst the fighting between this trio have slowly trickled out. It isn't apparent at first -- especially for people pitting their attentions on a heated fight -- but slowly, slowly, it becomes all too apparent that something is happening. By the time that Kerian engages Choi with that blast of concentrated chi force, the parking lot is entirely vacant, save for them. All is quiet but for the sound of battle. It's almost eerie.
And it certainly does not last long.
Tense silence is broken with the dull revving of engines. It is brief, like a thunderclap. And it is followed by another. And another. And another, like a procession of beating war drums. Headlights flare in the distance as vehicular beasts come to life. Tires squeal with the sound of rubber ripping across asphalt...
... and a horde of monster trucks suddenly rip onto the scene like wild animals. Crushing into cars in the parking lot impeding their progress, the number five in all -- each designed to look as if they were 'zombified,' rusting and 'falling apart' as if they were simply rotting away. Each of them is driven by would-be zombies (and the makeup makes them look half-real), letting out incoherent groans as their monster vehicles tear across the parking lot from multiple directions, intent to run over Katana, Choi and Kerian mercilessly. And as they ride, there is loud cries blaring over speakers:
"Braaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiinssss...!"
"Braaaiinnnsss!!"
"Braaainns... ...!"
"BraaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiNNNNSSSS!!"
"YEEHAW, BRAINS!"
The last one is likely not accurate to script.
COMBATSYS: Katana endures Starscream's Run Your Braaaiiiiinsssss Over.
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Choi 0/-------/----===|==-----\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-------/=======|=======\-------\0 Kerian
COMBATSYS: Katana interrupts Power Strike from Choi with Daikyou Burning.
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Choi 1/-------/=======|==-----\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-----==/=======|=======\-------\0 Kerian
It's as the zombies vanish that the Shogun is .. interested. "WHAT!? There are no more..." And yet then BAMPH. RIGHT THERE. The Shogun emperor stares out as there happens to be a HORDE OF MONSTER TRUCKS on hand. The Shogun stares at this, for a moment, nearly dropping his weaponry. "It's so beautiful." He notes, before the five trucks suddenly assault them, driven by zombies... and running at them with groans, intend on running them over.. WITH THE CRIES OF BRAINS.
Katana likes that last Zombie THE MOST.
Yet the Shogun is struck by a truck. On purpose.
"Ha.. HAHAHAH!" The Shogun bellows, as he leaps towards a truck.. and unfortunately is driven into. "ARGH!" He yells, but he holds on, being rammed into as he jumps.
And suddenly flies through the air like a bird gaining wings. Towards Choi.
"Ha .. HAHAHAH! The double claws swinging downwards instead meet the Shoguns wakizashi, slamming into CHoi mid air. Then dragging him against the ground as they fly, before the Shogun SMASHES against the chainlink fence, and then slamming Choi into the ground as he rolls onto his back.
"D-. DAIKYOU .. " Hack. "BURNING.".
HELLS YES.
COMBATSYS: Choi dodges Kerian's Magnum Blast.
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Choi 1/-------/=======|==-----\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-----==/=======|=======\-------\0 Kerian
COMBATSYS: Choi parries Starscream's Run Your Braaaiiiiinsssss Over!
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Choi 1/------=/=======|==-----\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-----==/=======|=======\-------\0 Kerian
Choi manages to catch Katana in midair, driving his claws down. He barely notices Kerian's- hey. Wait a minute. Choi isn't gay! He is a nightmare! There is a different! This is like all those Cloud pairings you got, Kerian. Instead of all those 14-year old girl pairings. Oh. Yeah. I know all about you and Mary Sue. I hope you enjoyed her moistness, you man-whore!
Anyways, Choi was about to land a perfect hit on Katana, but Kerian had to distract him with homosexual undertones. Nice. No wait. That wasn't it. It was the GIANT ZOMBIE TRUCKS that distracted him. The midget stared out, jaw-slack. Trucks? He hated trucks! And worse yet, there were only a handful of sexy dead girls in them. The Korean made a mental musing about them not staying completely in character, if you know what I mean.
But then, Katana smashes him into the ground.
Choi found himself like a Jill Sandwich, but instead of Jill, it was Sodom and Choi. The midget groaned, struggling. The only good that came from the ground spike was that Katana helpfully moved the midget out of the way of the straw beam of death. But now, Choi had a bigger problem. A line of trucks were already bearing upon him. This was a very bad thing. Scurrying upright, he saw the massive vehicle bear over him. The midget did the only intelligent thing. He charged at the truck, lifting his claws up.
Using the Truck's own weight against it, the midget carefully pushes the truck above him. This was not unusual. Kim Kaphwan had taught him how Trucks, like bears, were some of the greatest vessels of evil. That wasn't the hard part, no. This was Gravedigger, the most dangerous of trucks. The front wheel quickly moved to overtake Choi. And he swiftly moved his claws to meet the wheel...
And pushes himself to it's side.
The rear axle met the same fate, grazing his palms at the bottom of the behemoth, keeping a grip just long enough to launch himself into the air. Still shooting backwards, he met the second monster truck with a roll. Whirling up and over the truck gently, he lands behind the pair of trucks delicately. Or rather, not.
Digging his claws in the sides of the last truck, he let it shoot by Katana. Grinning madly, he dropped his foot down towards the ground, and sticks his claws out straight. The truck gives him a burst of spinning speed, exploding his entire body in a whirlwind of energy, dust, and BRAAAAAAAAINS. But mostly blue energy. Immediately, the cyclone of whirling death was rattling loudly, blasting at disturbing speed to overtake the Shogun, and suck him into what could easily be considered...
His doom.
COMBATSYS: Starscream successfully hits Kerian with Run Your Braaaiiiiinsssss Over.
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Choi 0/-------/------=|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-----==/=======|>>>>>>>\>>>>>>>\2 Kerian
Kerian is hit. Or more accurately, he's run over, sent flying across the mall, and knocked through the wall quite painfully, brutally, and...well, in general, it's really a nasty blow. A really unfortunate young woman's date is knocked aside by the flying bishonen, and his clothes are absolutely shredded from the blow, leaving him looking - quite ironically - like the end of Final Fantasy 7.
And we all know how that ended.
He doesn't so much moan as stand, eyes rolled back into his head from the pain of the blow. He was completely unconscious, bleeding, and far too gone to care about the pain he was no longer awake enough to fail.
The Super Soaker falls into his grip comfortably as the unconscious warrior stalks forward, animated now by the chi pouring into his feet, into his finger, into the super-soaker's water-collecting area.
The Soaker blazes with light, all the Shinsokuhou-ryu disciple's chi rolling about like the sea.
Unconsciously, his free hand pumps the grip once.
Then he takes off.
It's a blaze of glory, but it's glorious nonetheless. The unconscious young man simply disappears, too fast for the ordinary eye to see, a smoking crater of chi left in his wake. It's only after a second or two that the two conscious fighters would realize that he's moving around them at such a speed as to leave literal afterimages, all of them with white, pale eyes looking ahead and Super-Soakers charged with chi and glowing like the sun pointed inwards.
The ring of light resembles nothing so much as a massive wheel, enclosing the pair, as animal instinct and muscle memory honed to the point of obsessive mastery kick in.
Then the assault comes.
A hundred, a thousand, a countless, limitless number of chi blasts lance inwards, from all directions, all ways, all sides, striking for their center. From above, the display would look as though it were a glowing coin, a discus of DEATH.
The assault continues, not slowing, not stopping, not relenting in its massive punishment from all about, even as Kerian's speed picks up. There's a trench digging its way into the ground, and the acrid smell of burning rubber is perhaps one of the most offensive smells in the world to smell after the monster truck smoke poured through, pervading the mall and causing many bystanders to gag or look away.
And then, as abruptly as it started, it's over. Kerian's nowhere to be found; mainly because the unconscious form just gave out midway through, tripped on a rock that hadn't been eaten away by the chi, and been sent flying, sprawled across the roof in an incredibly amusing-looking - and probably intensely painful - splatter.
Chunks of Super-Soaker rain down over the battlefield, and the dustcloud slowly clears as the wind picks it up, sending it rolling away from the battlefield, a roving testament to the Godlike Bullet Rave.
COMBATSYS: Kerian can no longer fight.
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Choi 0/-------/------=|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-----==/=======|
COMBATSYS: Choi successfully hits Katana with Shin! Tatsumaki Shinkuu Zan EX.
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Choi 0/-------/------=|====---\-------\0 Starscream
[ \\\\\\\\\ <
Katana 1/--=====/=======|
The Shogun finds himself under assault. As he watches Choi, Choi .. what an amazing sight, truly. How he rides the truck, and then leaps off, claws sticking out and causing a MASSIVE CYCLONE OF WHIRLING DEATH. This gets the Shogun, and it overtakes him rather well. "YOU.. SHALL NOT.. HAVE ME." He notes, or tries to note, as the Shogun ends up being dragged into it.
Ripped and torn, he's tossed away, alive perhaps only due to his prevention.
What comes next is the Shogun being tossed away, striking the ground, bouncing and then skidding. It is now that the Shogun finds himself tired.. enough to at least rest.
Because you see. There was a challenge here. It will not go unanswered.
For now, the Shogun awaits.. wakizashi pulled backwards.. in the cold air about the mall... ALL WAS GIANT TRUCKS.
And he can respect that, beaten, bloody, and nearly .. doomed.
COMBATSYS: Katana focuses on his next action.
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Choi 0/-------/------=|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/--=====/=======|
COMBATSYS: Choi blocks Kerian's Godlike Bullet Rave.
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Choi 0/-------/----===|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/--=====/=======|
Choi's whirling snatches more than just the Shogun. The whirling snatches up the entire fencing system, ripping it free to tear into Katana. However, there is something wrong. Something disruptive. As the great Chinese warrior is tossed to the ground, Kerian fails to parry the truck. Instead, he charges his laser, and then fires his laser. The beam rips across the asphalt and blasts through the cyclone, shutting the storm down immediately.
In the wake of the tornado, was Choi. The midget was slowing his winding down when the beam broke through. The positive was that he blocked in time. The negative? The negative was that it hit.
HARD.
The Korean stood there, breathing heavily. First his back was oozing blood. Now his front was. But one man was down. Freddy had to figure out how to take out the Chinese warrior. Looking over at Katana, he grimaced. In the distance, he heard the roar of the trucks. The trucks. The midget thought for a moment. They would be coming around again, wouldn't they.
The little man grinned, flexing his arms. "One, Two, Freddy's coming for you..." He began stretching his arms from side to side. He wasn't going to charge the Chinese warrior. Oh no. He learned the problems of that LAST time.
COMBATSYS: Choi gains composure.
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Choi 0/-------/------=|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/--=====/=======|
It's as the Korean is nearly shot up that the Shogun notices HIS KILL WAS STOLEN BY TRUCK. ZOMBIE TRUCK. "This .. SHALL NEVER BE ALLOWED!" It already has been too. Kinda late. But it's as the Korean, who stands there, breathing heavily remarks.. it's simple. The trucks would come. The Shogun would .. BE DONE. Or would he be!?
In the end, the Shogun looked on to Choi as he mentioned .. oh .. he's coming for him. The Shogun awaits. "Oh .. ho... SO THIS IS HOW IT SHALL BE, SMALL ONE!?" The EMPEROR of Mad Gear cries. "THEN LET ME SHOW YOU YOUR FOLLY!" Barreling forwards, Katana charges, attempting to bring the wakizashi towards Choi .. as they spin.
WHAT WHIRLING DIRVISHES! They are TRULY remarkable.
And it is then that the Shogun barrels across the parking lot, blades a spinning as he moves towards the small one. "HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! You would have ME walk towards you.. if FREDDY was coming, then YOU should have moved.. BUT IT SEEMS LIKE IT IS THE SHOGUN WHO STRIKES FIRST, and he shall STRIKE TRUE AS WELL!"
The spinning blades are brought around, once.. twice.. swung in each hand!
And he whirls with them, the flags moving as he does, in a dance of blades, HONOR.. and JAPAN.
"SPINNING DRIVING DOLPHIN KICK OF FINAL HEAVENNNN!"
COMBATSYS: Choi dodges Katana's Random Strike.
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Choi 0/-------/------=|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/-======/=======|
Well, Choi was in a tough spot. A very tough spot! Katana was projecting his move all the way across the asphalt. "Three, four, better lock your door..." The little man muttered to himself, lowering himself down. Hunched over, he let the flags and blades whirl around.
"Five, six, grab your crucifix..."
The midget hit the floor, rolling towards Katana. Letting the whirling blades of death flash above him, the little man positioned himself right underneath the ninja samurai shogun warrior. And with a short hoot, leaps straight up into the air. Entering a backflip, he was attempting to stun the man for a short period of time. Already, he could hear the roar of the trucks as his flip kick whirls around to the loins of the mighty warrior...
COMBATSYS: Katana fails to interrupt Hien Zan from Choi with Run Your Ass Over.
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Choi 0/-------/-----==|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/=======/=======|
It's as Choi leaps forwards, after the blades miss their mark, that the Shogun .. WHISTLES.
".. YO!" The Shogun yells afterwards, and nothing. Nothing as the rolling midget strikes him, whirling blades of death and all.
And of course, then comes the blades. The Shogun is onset... And then there is a terrible.. terrible honking of a horn. "I .. REFUSE.. TO FALL! YET!" And the trucks barrels forwards, slamming into the wall and joining the circle of MONSTER TRUCKS.
"You HAVE YET TO FACE MY TRU-" DONK.
The Shogun is slammed off of by Choi, and the Truck fails to strike him, as Katana staggers backwards. "Next time .. YOU WILL NOT BE SO LUCKY!" The Massive Semi joins the circle.. if not pushing ANOTHER Monster Truck out of the way. THIS IS A SEMI PEOPLE.
Whoa, whoa. Let me get this straight.
Choi attacks your crotch.
Then you threatened to show him your truck.
And then, you truck fails to hit Choi.
So that's why you used to be called Sodom.
In any case, the midget flips hard upwards, feeling his foot collide with armor. Singing, he murmured to himself. "Seven, Eight, gonna stay up late..." Stupid Katana with all his armor and outfits. He made everything so hard! Well. ALMOST everything.
But now, Choi was airborne, and Katana was becoming staggered. The midget grinned, claws flared. Sailing back down to the ground, he dove right for the Samurai's face, singing all the way. "Nine... Ten... Never sleep again!" If he got a grip, his response would be simple: A tackle to the ground.
And then, leave him fodder for the Monstrous Trucks circling for the kill.
The ZOMBIE KILL.
COMBATSYS: Choi successfully hits Katana with Quick Throw.
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Choi 0/-------/-----==|====---\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 0/-------/=======|
One has bit the bullet, but the fight still continues to rage on, between the bouncing Kreuger and his Asiaphile enemy. The monster trucks circle like vultures swooping around dead or dying prey. They don't drive in for the kill; instead, the hulking, 'rotting' trucks just honk their horns menacingly. They might be mindless zombies but--
--they don't get a paycheck if they jump the gun.
The time comes the minute the diminutive Choi charges like an inhuman dynamo at Katana. At that exact moment, the engines of the zombie trucks roar to life, all five swerving in an about-face towards their prey. Roughly five seconds pass--
--and then the entire group of trucks are tearing off towards the grouped forms of Choi and Katana. One knocks an unfortunate nearby car straight through the air, the automobile barreling down the parking lot with the screech of metal to slam into Katana and Choi. It's a prelude to when the trucks RIP through, intent to knock into Katana and his very very small friend once, twice, thrice -- a grand total of -five- times before they peel off and away once more into the darkness like the terrible zombie monstrosities they are.
(made in America)
COMBATSYS: Katana counters Run Your Braaaiiiiinsssss Over from Starscream with Shiraha Catch.
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Choi 0/-------/-----==|======-\-------\0 Starscream
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Katana 1/------=/=======|
COMBATSYS: Katana can no longer fight.
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Choi 0/-------/-----==|======-\-------\0 Starscream
THE SURPRISE AND THE LOGIC DESTROY KATANA.
No really that's it. The Shogun is defeated through TERRIBLY TRUE LOGIC as Choi goes to tackle him to the ground. It works.. but the Shogun .. WILL NOT GIVE UP YET..
"I refuse.. to fall.. TO SUCH A POOR DEFEAT!" He exclaims, bellowing, before rising to his feet, staggering.. IS IT ALL OVER!? "I ... will.. ..." And then the car slams nearby Katana. "How beautiful..." He yells.
"I SHALL MAKE IT MY OWN!" This is not good for the driver of the Monster Truck.
The Shogun leaps into the MASSIVE WHEEL, and then leaps onto the driver seat. He CATCHES the wheel and flips onto the seat.. and then tosses the zombie out. "Ha.. HAHAHAHAH! THE SHOGUN'S TRUE PURPOSE HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!" He cheers, as the Shogun's Semi .. AND NOW MONSTER TRUCK.. drive off into the sunset.
"You may have this victory.... BUT I SHALL HAVE .. THIS TRUCK!"
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
COMBATSYS: Choi dodges Starscream's Run Your Braaaiiiiinsssss Over.
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Choi 0/-------/-----==|======-\-------\0 Starscream
Choi's tackle... worked? The midget yelped in surprise as the giant brute of a Mad Gear gave way. The last time he tried a throw on Katana, the samurai tore him a new one. Literally. Choi couldn't figure out how to use a toilet for about a week!
But bowel skills were a secondary concern now. As Choi goes down, the trucks rev up. The midget shrieks, leaving the Shogun to his own affairs. The automobile tears through the air, and Choi bounds upon it. Landing with a screeching crash, the little man leapt again. The first truck crosses, and the midget leaps on top. Rolling over and off it, the little man lands on the ground again.
Enter the other four. The second and third were easy. Choi just ducked low and aside, letting them pass. And the fourth... well, that proved a problem to Freddy.
The midget just stared at the sunset, the Gravedigger running off towards it. He thought Katana was out for the count. He was wrong. He just took off his hat, and pressed it against his heart. "Truly." The midget began, nodding his head. "There is no greater criminal than that Chinese man."
COMBATSYS: Starscream has left the fight here.
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Choi 0/-------/-----==|
Log created on 18:26:44 11/02/2008 by Katana, and last modified on 12:25:14 11/10/2008.