SNF 2006.09 - Gedo Rules! Shenwoo vs Haggar

Description: Inside, you can expect to find: Haggar and Shenwoo jousting with couches; Carlos watching intently from the sidelines; Haggar's couch exploding as he flies backward; Haggar landing on Carlos; Haggar getting up and picking up Carlos; Haggar throwing Carlos at Shenwoo. Who the heck is Carlos, anyway? (Draw Match)

There is an aura about this place today. Gedo already typically has that tense, exciting atmosphere, but right now it is something more. Usually, there's activity everywhere - students training, talking loudly, and such. Now, there is a hush. Students lounge about the courtyard, leaving a very wide berth for the two men who aren't students at all. There is little talking. Everyone is waiting for the battle, which is likely going to be so awesome that Gedo will probably start having Haggar Thursdays in the cafeteria, where everyone gets a steak or a turkey for the main course, with three large baked potatoes, gravy on everything, with a cocktail of raw eggs and pure /badass./
Haggar puts one hand on his right shoulder and wheels it - it's been a while since he's actually fought, but he's kept up with his sparring and isn't rusty at all. He looks about the courtyard, grinning beneath his moustache at all the stuff strewn about. It's like a party, and Shenwoo's invited! In the face.

COMBATSYS: Haggar has started a fight here.

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Haggar           0/-------/-------|

Poor Shenwoo: The only time he's ever been in a highschool is when he gets scheduled to fight in one. Probably a side-effect of that whole 'growing up on the streets' thing. Arriving into the courtyard second, Shen might not be quite as huge as Haggar, but he's crazy enough to make up for it, in all likelihood. "Man, this place is a mess," says Shenwoo as he enters, one hand in his pocket and the other hanging free at his side, his eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses and a wide, wolfish grin on his face.

But really, who is Shenwoo to complain about the surroundings? He knows the rules of this match, and he's fought this opponent before - he knows he's in for plenty of fun. "SO!" he shouts over at Haggar, unable to contain his exuberance as he pulls his hand from his pocket, and slips into his loose boxing stance, leading with his right hand. "Ready to get embarassed in front of a bunch of highschool brats?!" Ah, it's just trash talking; and the self-styled 'God of Battle' isn't much older than the students here anyway.

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo has joined the fight here.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0           Haggar

Haggar's eyes flash as he sees the perfect thing, and he stretches out his neck with a series of cracks as he sets off toward it. "Ha! We'll see who'll be embarassed here, son." What could he be going for? There's a bunch of 2x4s over there, a small TV, and a sofa a few kids are lounging on. Nothing spectacular. "But you know something? I don't think these kids are here to see you and me talk from thirty feet away." He picks up the TV leaning against the sofa, tossing it away, and then... grabs the sofa. Realizing his intention, the Gedo students quickly vacate. One may be laughing.

With a grunt, the Mayor hauls up the sofa onto his shoulder. "So let's just get this started!" Without further ado, Haggar sprints directly at Shenwoo, sofa over his shoulder. His intentions are clear! His intentions are violent! His intentions are TOTALLY AWESOME.

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo interrupts Random Weapon from Haggar with Random Weapon.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/----===|====---\-------\0           Haggar

Hey... Sofa, what? Shenwoo is being /charged at/ by some huge dude with a /sofa on his shoulder/? Luckily, though, it's not the only couch in the courtyard - though there may soon be none at all. Nearby Shen is, conveniently, another such couch, with more students lounging on it; grabbing the piece of furniture, the brawler from Shanghai dumps the occupants off, swings the couch up on his shoulder, and rushes to meet Haggar's charge.

Behond, the ancient art of Couch Jousting.

"HORA!!" shouts the self-styled 'God of Battle' as he crashes heedlessly into Haggar's couch, both pieces of furniture smashing in an impressive fashion, the impact hurting him... But not as much as actually getting run down would've. But is Haggar so lucky?! Perhaps not!

This is the greatest thing in the world, as a note.

Haggar's couch meets Shenwoo's couch with a great shattering of wood and ripping of cloth. Neither couch survives this encounter, splinters and cotton and upholstery exploding outward in a ring. For whatever reason, be it a better swing, a sturdier couch, or pure luck, Shenwoo's couch takes just longer enough to fragment than Haggar's, the wrestler being caught hard in the chest and sent sliding back, bleeding lightly in several places. Unfortunately for Shenwoo, the adrenaline is pumping, and this isn't going to slow him down for long. "Hrrrgh!" Ground piles up behind his boots as he digs in to a stop, launching himself forward again at Shenwoo.

Mouth fixed in a tight line, Haggar attempts to get a good solid hold on Shenwoo, looking to pin his elbows to his sides, leaving him wide open for several crushing skull -> skull blows.

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo endures Haggar's Repeated Headbutts.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-======|======-\-------\0           Haggar

But while Haggar's mouth might be fixed in a firm line, Shenwoo's remains in a wide, wild grin. Tossing aside what little is left of the couch, the berserker doesn't even try to get out of the way of Haggar's grapple or headbutts, and instead he gets totally hit with them. His sunglasses break, falling off and revealing dark eyes with a bit of a crazy glint to them. See, he's having /fun/.

"That was good!!" laughs Shenwoo after the headbutting, staggering back a little, free of the grapple... And then twisting to try and kick Haggar in the gut as hard as he can, with a loud cry of: "BUT I'M JUST GETTING STARTED, HERE!"

COMBATSYS: Haggar fails to counter Fusen Kyaku from Shenwoo with Hammer Thru.
- Power hit! -

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Shenwoo          1/------=/=======|=======\==-----\1           Haggar

Well, it's not like Haggar's not having fun, either! He's just more composed in a fight. Composed, and also kicked. The Mayor misses his step around the incoming foot in the worst way, actually adding to the force of the blow, and getting himself knocked backwards a fair distance. He stumbles on his way back, landing in what was apparently mutually decided as the Bottle Zone. Glass shatters and grinds as Haggar topples into the pointiest, sparkliest place in all the land.

Truly, this is a battle for the ages, with enormous attacks being tossed about. It could even be considered... Epic. Shenwoo watches Haggar sail away and crash into a bunch of now-broken bottles, wincing a little. That's /gotta/ hurt. And while it's true Shen is the sort of person who fights for fun, and he's been known to toy with an opponent or two on occasion... His hard-learned habit is to pounce on whatever weakness is presented, and Gedo is just reminding him of the way things were, back in Shanghai. It's like crazy flashbacks.

Grinning still, and not really giving Haggar time to recover from his crash landing, Shen picks up a two by four, and a large rock. Uh oh. "Hey, you like baseball?" he wonders of the all-American mayor. Double uh-oh. But yes, with one hand he tosses the rock straight up, and then he takes a swing at it with the two by four, driving it right towards the possibly still prone Haggar. Which is not a very nice thing of him to do.

COMBATSYS: Haggar blocks Shenwoo's Thrown Object.

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Shenwoo          1/------=/=======|=======\==-----\1           Haggar

"Do I like baseball?" Haggar practically vaults up out of the horrible pit of glass, leaving some blood behind and taking some glass shards with him. He doesn't seem to care. Haggar lifts a forearm for the rock, letting it thunk into the meat and bounce away. "Son, I haven't missed a Gears game in 20 years!" Luckily for Haggar and all those watching, the broken bottle zone is right by the baseball bat zone! Haggar bends down, gathering up four bats (two for each mighty hand), and taking off for Shenwoo. "And you call that a swing?!"

Just before he gets to his opponent, Haggar makes a short hop to break some of his momentum, turning hard to the right. When he lands, he continues to turn, going into his trademark rapid spin. His arms comes too, and with them the four baseball bats! Hit or miss, once Haggar's spin is done, the bats will fly off in random directions, likely causing people to have to dodge.

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo dodges Haggar's Spinning Clothesline.

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Shenwoo          1/------=/=======|=======\==-----\1           Haggar

That's... A lot of baseball bats. Shenwoo actually looks a little bewildered at that, and then HOLY CRAP SPINNING BASEBALL BAT HAGGAR ASSAULT. However, the 'God of Battle' has enough sense to duck /under/ the attack, letting the bats whirl harmlessly over his head... And then fly at random innocent bystanders. It must really suck to go to Gedo High, huh?

"Yeah, well, I never liked baseball anyway," Shenwoo explains, and he's still holding that two by four, so don't mind him while he whips it right at the larger man's head, in another baseball-style swing. Obviously the reason he didn't like it was they wouldn't let him play: He probably kept throwing the bat at the pitcher. "GRAAAH!!"

COMBATSYS: Haggar counters Random Weapon from Shenwoo with Power Swing.

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Shenwoo          1/=======/=======|==-----\-------\0           Haggar

Carlos, watching from a seat a safe or at least mostly-non-lethal distance away, tilts his head to the left to let a baseball bat go flying by with a disconcertingly loud whistling sound. His hair is swished across his face by its passage, so he has to raise a hand to sweep it back into a more managably tousled condition so he can return to eating his popcorn. "The fury!" he exclaims in between bites. "The passion! It is like a romance of action! It is like a love novel written for fists, and on the cover Fabio is accompanied only by another Fabio with spikes and a pipe and they are just beating the /hell/ out of each other!" Crunch, crunch. Look down. "What is /in/ this popcorn?"

Never liked baseball?



Haggar's giant left hand comes up, catching the two-by-four en route, and clenching. The wood practically explodes beneath his divine grip. His other hand comes up and grabs Shenwoo's wrist, and many said after that there was a completely inexplicable flash of blue light! Haggar hauls Shenwoo off his feet, and over his head, whipping him about like a lasso made of dude. "Maybe you just need some pitching pointers!" There's that famous Haggar 'wit' right there.

However, the wit is not what is important. What is important is that Haggar makes one final turn with his body before hurling Shenwoo by his forearm directly at a pile of beaten down recliners and couches. And we have come full circle.

For a moment, a long moment, there's no movement from the pile of now very broken recliners and couches and very hurt Shenwoo. That was, in fact, one helluva hit. Mortal men would be broken in half by that sort of thing. But Shen, after all, is Shen. Sitting up finally, he remains in that position for another long moment, his shoulders shaking. Maybe that really hurt? Maybe he's in a lot of pain! Though any questions there are resolved when the brawler throws his head back and starts laughing uproariously, getting shakily to his feet.

"That was great!" Shenwoo exclaims exuberantly. "This is it... This is the fight I wanted!!" And for a moment, Shenwoo rears back, before he explodes forward, practically vanishing from sight. The blurring figure of the self-styled 'God of Battle' rushes right at Haggar at speeds one wouldn't suspect him capable of, hair and shirt trailing behind him, his beringed left fist thrown forward. A shockwave of energy surrounds the berserker, centered on his fist as he streaks towards Haggar like some crazy human projectile, intent on hitting Haggar hard and knocking him towards anything that might break his fall. Like maybe Carlos! "SHYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo successfully hits Haggar with Zetsu Gekiken.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-======|====---\-------\0           Haggar

/Now/ Haggar grins, dropping to a ready stance as Shenwoo gets back up. "Glad you like it, son!" As the crazy berserker kid comes flying at him, the Mayor is intent on letting the young punk know that this is still his house, stepping forward and spreading his arms wide. If only he was a bit more of an immovable object, this would have worked.

There is a brilliant flare at impact, and for a moment it looks like Haggar's going to resist the demands of physics - but, no. He is knocked backwards off his feet, spinning a wonderful corkscrew through the air, directly where Shenwoo secretly wanted him to go all along - Carlos. Haggar lands heavily /on/ him, and soon a pile of Mayor, Spaniard, and Student is created. But NOTHING IS OVER.

Like a vengeful god rising from the rubble of his ruined temple, Haggar slowly emerges from the pile, holding the nearest thing over his head - Carlos. It's cool, he can handle it. He's breathing heavily, lacerated, bruised, but there's that fire in his eyes. Mike Haggar wastes no time in, with two great strides, moving out of the pile, leaning back, and hurling the swordsman roughly head-first at Shenwoo. "HOOOWAAAH!"

Carlos finds himself crushed, but then quickly rising up from the crowd like a monster from the deep, trailing popcorn instead of great rivulets of disturbed ocean, and being held above his landlord's head rather than standing 30 stories high. It is not exactly an ideal situation, but he only manages to assert that he is indeed completely confused by his situation before it rapidly and direly changes from being held in the air to being THROWN THROUGH IT. He quickly assesses this situation and, snapping off a quick salute of "roger that!" to Haggar behind him, he twists to aim the deadliest part of his body at Shenwoo: His face, assaulting Shenwoo with lethally sharp comeliness. Some people yell 'not in the face!' Carlos believes that if his face can't take the occasional brick wall or enemy combatant, it doesn't deserve to be pretty.

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo dodges Haggar's Large Thrown Object.

[                    \\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////                    ]
Shenwoo          0/-------/-======|====---\-------\0           Haggar

Rebounding a few feet from the impact of the Zetsu! Gekiken against Haggar's mighty frame, Shenwoo is feeling pretty good about himself! Oh, sure, he's hurting and all, but they've been trading solid hits here today like it was some kind of swap meet... OF VIOLENCE. And /then/, Haggar is throwing a spectator at him, which all things considered, Shen would rather avoid.

Shenwoo doesn't even do anything nice, like /catch/ Carlos. The lean fighter just sidesteps out of the way, letting him fly into the pike of broken and battered sofas and chairs, which do not provide for the world's softest landing. But at least he's out of the way again. Stepping on the end of another two by four, Shenwoo catches the wooden plank, turning and hucking it, spear-like, at Haggar. He's not the only one who can throw things! Plus it's more aerodynamic than a Spanish dude. "Ora!!"

Carlos should have known better to aim with the slickest part of his body, as his totally untouchable features just go sailing past Shenwoo. Carlos suddenly finds that his new destination is a pile of sofas which do not look comfortable at all, which he crashes and sticks into like a harpoon through a nest of snakes. From underneath shredded upholstery his hand raises up, shifting aside bits of splintered wood, reaching for the sky. His fingers tremble, hand shaking, steadying- and then throwing up the horns before falling back into the mess with the rest of his body.
And Carlos is Brazilian!


COMBATSYS: Shenwoo successfully hits Haggar with Large Thrown Object.

[                   \\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////                        ]
Shenwoo          0/-------/=======|======-\-------\0           Haggar

The plank is more aerodynamic than a Spanish dude, but the only difference between a Spaniard and a Brazilian IS IN FACT their level of aerodynamics. Clearly Shenwoo is dumb.

However, one might say that the really dumb ones basically stand there while a wood plank drills into their chest! Haggar stumbles back as the wood shatters, driving yet more splinters into him, but that wonderful Fighter Adrenaline keeps him running at Shenwoo, dropping into something of a bull rush, headfirst. Could this be a setup for a THROW?!

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo dodges Haggar's Strong Throw.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/=======|======-\-------\0           Haggar

Maybe Shenwoo IS dumb, but he's not dumb enough to let Haggar get ahold of him again when they're both in such a condition; instead, he skirts cleanly /around/ the mayor of Metro City, handily avoiding that bull rush and potential throw. Crouching low for a second, the berserker pushes off with one foot, once again charging right at Haggar, though this time hopefully before he's recovered from the toss; throwing his left fist forward again, it's a more minor version of that rushing punch he used earlier, but it still might hurt some! "RAAAAH!!"

Maybe Shenwoo IS dumb, but he's not dumb enough to let Haggar get ahold of him again when they're both in such a condition; instead, he skirts cleanly /around/ the mayor of Metro City, handily avoiding that bull rush and potential throw. Crouching low for a second, the berserker pushes off with one foot, once again charging right at Haggar, though this time hopefully before he's recovered from the toss; throwing his left fist forward again, it's a more minor version of that rushing punch he used earlier, but it still might hurt some! "RAAAAH!!" <repose>

COMBATSYS: Haggar fails to counter Gekiken from Shenwoo with Hammer Thru.

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Shenwoo          1/------=/=======|=======\=------\1           Haggar

COMBATSYS: Haggar has reached second wind!

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Shenwoo          1/------=/=======|=======\=------\1           Haggar

Haggar halts his rush when he is dodged, turning with a skid of gravel, dirt, and glass shards. He moves to try it again, but when he sees Shenwoo coming back for him, the Mayor pulls up, balling both fists together in an axehandle for his most reliable counter.

However, the momentum is definitely not on Haggar's side. He's unable to deflect the Gekiken properly, the punch taking him unceremoniously off his feet and into a nearby stack of cinder blocks. Stone shatters under his bulk as he crashes through most of them, filling the air with dust and smoke, so thick that you can't see through it.

So, obviously he's not actually knocked out.

Surely, NOBODY could survive so much dust.

Shenwoo isn't so sure, however. It doesn't seem like something that would take out anybody like the Mighty Mayor of Metro City. Maybe a lesser mayor, like McCheese. No, this calls for a finishing blow! So Shenwoo goes and grabs two of the remaining baseball bats still lying around, one in each hand. What on /earth/ is he going to do?

The answer is, he's going to charge over to where Haggar ended up, looking as wild and feral as ever, and try to catch his opponent with a furious combination of hits with those bats. It's not pretty, there's not much finesse to it... But it's probably gonna leave a mark if it hits! "Ora, ora!!"

COMBATSYS: Haggar blocks Shenwoo's Kohyou Rengeki.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-------|=======\===----\1           Haggar

The rapid beating swingings of Shenwoo's baseball bats suddenly split the dust could dramatically, revealing Haggar miraculously standing, arms crossed in front of him, roaring as he takes the blows, chews them up, and then bleeds a little because damnit this has been a brutal fight. His roar redoubling, the mayor throws his arms wide to give himself some space. He ducks down briefly to grab a whole cinder block in his right hand. "You're not going to take me down that easily, son!"

Haggar lunges forward, not swinging the cinder block, but simply attempting to place it on top of Shenwoo's head. His other hand then wheels all the way around, a giant fist hoping to crash /through the block/ into the top of the berserker's skullmeat.

COMBATSYS: Haggar successfully hits Shenwoo with Strong Punch.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-----==|=======\===----\1           Haggar

With the cinder block placed on his head, Shenwoo tries to get his arms up in time to stop Haggar's swing, but not so much. Instead, he gets it right in the skullmeats, which makes him drop the (broken, that's how hardcore that beating was supposed to be!) baseball bats, and stagger a little. "Tch... Then I guess I'll just have to..." Catching half of the cinder block that's still at least kind of intact, he hucks it right at Haggar, though it's more of a gesture of defiance than anything else. Hey, he just got hit in the head, he's not coming up with better ideas just yet.

COMBATSYS: Haggar dodges Shenwoo's Thrown Object.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-----==|=======\===----\1           Haggar

Haggar just kinda ducks under the cinder block, though that reaction time and agility is impressive for him in these close quarters. And, well, he's already in this position, so, he tries again! The Mayor slams forward at Shenwoo, in another SETUP FOR A THROW?!

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo dodges Haggar's Strong Throw.

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Shenwoo          0/-------/-----==|=======\===----\1           Haggar

It might be a setup for a throw, but this time Shenwoo slips backwards out of Haggar's mighty reach! It's a display of frightening tenacity and persistence between these two, and that's what makes it HARDCORE. However, Shen's not content to just put some space between himself and Haggar, oh no. Sometimes you just have to risk it, and that's exactly what the Shanghai-born brawler does, taking a twisting step back forward /at/ Haggar, and sticking one leg out in a thrusting, straight-legged kick aiming to bury his heel in the mayor's gut! "JUST GIVE UP ALREADY!!"

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo successfully hits Haggar with Tenrenshou.
- Power hit! -

[                       \\\\\\\  < >                                ]
Shenwoo          0/-------/-----==|=======\======-\1           Haggar

Haggar is kicked AGAIN. ALWAYS WITH THE KICKING. He is sent a few feet away, dropping to a knee with one arm on the ground, and coughing. Any subpar fighter would call it a day at this point, but Mike Haggar has been battle-forged many times over. If he didn't give up when dropped into a cage filled with /the entire Andore family,/ is he going to give up now?

"LIKE HELL!" Haggar suddenly surges forward at high speed, leaving a trail of red behind him. His hand stabs out like Thor's mighty hammer, seeking to catch Shenwoo's forehead and throw him to the ground. This is only the beginning of the end.

COMBATSYS: Haggar has reached third wind!

[                       \\\\\\\  < >  ///                           ]
Shenwoo          0/-------/-----==|==-----\-------\0           Haggar

COMBATSYS: Haggar successfully hits Shenwoo with Giant Swing.

[                                < >  ///                           ]
Shenwoo          1/-----==/=======|==-----\-------\0           Haggar

CONTACT! Sweet contact. The hit is hard, but it's nothing compared to what comes after. Haggar practically pounces on Shenwoo's legs, hoisting them up and locking them under his armpits. Then he begins to spin. And spin. But the area being what it is, Shenwoo is hardly going to whistle through the air until Haggar releases him. No, Haggar guides the much younger man's progress through such things as TVs, pallets, the furniture pile (Hi Carlos!), before finally with one extra-hard spin just hurling him away in whatever direction. The mayor staggers briefly after his throw, almost pitching over to the side. That /should/ have been the end.

But after a few moments, his fist slams against the ground, and the wrestler climbs back to his feet. It's pretty extreme.

Smashing hard into one of the school walls, Shenwoo is just... Messed right up. He slides off the wall after jut a moment, landing shakily on his feet, and coughing up some blood. But then, he grins again at Haggar, a huge, crazy, bloody grin. "S'good... But I won't just..." he staggers a little, wobbling forward. He's gonna drop any second now, there's no way he won't... But by god he's going to take Haggar /with him/.

Stumbling forward and looking like he's going to fall finally, Shen throws himself forward into another rushing punch, though this one is slowed by the damage to his body and his fading consciousness. But all of his will is focused on one simple thing: Hitting Haggar as hard as he can with his fist and that shockwave of energy, and knocking the mayor down with him. "SHYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!"

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo can no longer fight.

[                           \\\  <
Haggar           0/-------/----===|

COMBATSYS: Shenwoo successfully hits Haggar with Zetsu Gekiken.

[                                <
Haggar           0/-------/-======|

Haggar stares at that oncoming fist, wavering on his feet, eyes half-closed, chest a mass of bruises and cuts - though the suspender is miraculously still in place. Just before Shenwoo gets there, he plants his feet, and maybe tried to duck to the side.

It didn't work, of course. Shenwoo's blazing fist connects Haggar for the second time, sending him up and away, /clearing/ the funiture pile mostly, only nicking the recliner on top with his boot. He lands some distance away in an actual clear area, rolling briefly before coming to an unconcious(?!) halt.

COMBATSYS: Haggar takes no action.

COMBATSYS: Haggar can no longer fight.

And likewise, rebounding off of his final attack on Haggar, Shenwoo just... Hits the ground, out like a light. You wouldn't know that he just got beaten into unconsciousness in a dilapidated school courtyard which has now been reduced to even /greater/ devastation by these two mighty combatants by the smile on his face, as happy dreams of punching people float through his head.

Log created by Shenwoo, and last modified on 11:54:55 09/10/2006.