Neo League 751 - #758: Skullomania vs Nataya

Description: In this Neo League sanctioned match we see why spunky crazy melee guys like Skullomania really dislike fireball throwing magic users. He leaves with the question of how to learn to overcome this shortcoming. But you would only know that from reading this. Nataya of course learns who Skullomania is and that he is a nice guy, really strange, but also not 'that' nice because if you give him an inch he'll always take the mile. ( Winner: Nataya )

The mall, the mall, the Southtown mall!
The store that really has it all!
From housewares to clothes, most anything goes!
At the glorious Southtown mall!

At least, that's what the jingles say. Nataya's not much for shopping in the mall these days, what with the bad economy in Asia and the fact that she's not really rolling in the dough at this point. Nevertheless, when she went down to the Neo League office to draw her challenge card for the day, she ended up here, fighting a fellow with the conspicuous name of 'Skullomania'.

Just who or what a Skullomania was escaped Nataya, but the monk-trained girl had long since abandoned any hope of understanding what it was with the people she ended up with in Neo Leage. First it was the short guy, then it was the witch girl... and really it's just been an endless parade of just very odd people.

Still, she takes to the League like she takes to anything else: with a smile on her face and a general acceptance that she's doing all this for a reason, whatver that reason might be.

The mall's center court has been cleared out, save for a square area cordoned off by rope while the Neo League staff set up cameras. Monitors in the mall display the fight chard, as well as the various advertising sponsors for the match. Nataya's sitting on a bench, eating what's being billed as a 'Busta Nut Energy Bar'. Like most fad 'energy food', it tastes like shoe polish. But Nataya's not going to turn down free eats.

She's dressed in her robes, the beads hanging from her large sleeves scraping the ground as she makes small talk with one of the camera operators. "Really? 'Survivor'? I didn't even know they made that show anymore."

Skullomania is gesticulating frantically with his hands talking to the program director next to the cameraman Nataya is speaking to. "No no, I've been in the Neo League the whole time. I uh... Just got busy. I mean sick. Yeah. Or something. But now I'm going to compete. Right?"

The guy smirks and shakes his head at Skullo's verbal retreat, causing his ponytail to flutter a bit. "Well you're on the card for Nataya, that's why we're here, that's why you're here. And..." He looks at his watch forcing a grimace onto his face trying his darndest to make it look legit. "We're late on shooting it because we had to send someone to your apartment and pick you up because your alarm clock was broken and we had to pull you out of that puddle of drool, remember?"

Skullomania frowns beneath his mask and begins to wring out his gloves while they are still on his hands, alternating fists, this causes long dangling torrents of drool to pour out of the material his super-suit is made from, whatever it might be, it looks like latex but since it doesn't hold water, you probably don't want to know.

"No. I don't remember that. I have no idea what you're talking about." He turns and taps Nataya on the shoulder confusing her with a girl he met minutes earlier from the 'editing' department. "Whichever way the cookie crumbles, could you maybe, you know, cut out anything where I look particularly bad? I spent the past year being a good samaritan saving cats from trees and children from broccoli and I still don't have any street cred. Like I was invisible or something. Which I'm not. As you can see."
He takes a deep, calming breath and then exhales as his red scarf unfurls from around his neck in the complete absence of breeze and begins to flutter dramatically.

Well, if Nataya wasn't a grade A kookypants herself, she'd have something to say about now.

However, the relentlessly cheerful woman recognizes Skullomania from his signup card, smiles, and stands up grabbing his hand, shaking vigorously. "Well, I can't promise that, seeing as I'm actually you're opponent," she says with a warm smile usually only seen on camp counselors. In movies. For children. Nevertheless, Nataya manages to make it look 100% sincere as she tosses aside the terrible snack food.

"But the producer's right. We /are/ pretty late. So I think we're set to fight in a few minutes. Let's go ahead and get set up, and we'll give them a good show, yes?" And with that, she grabs him by the wrist and leads Skullomania to the ring without so much as a how do you do.

"I'm Nataya, by the way," she says by means of a more formal greeting. "It's a pleasure to meet you! Hopefully we can have a good fight. The last one I participated in had a fairly angry man who spent most of the fight tossing me into trees of the ground."

Skullomania shakes Nataya's hand and follows her into the ring. He's allready swallowed the awkwardness of that moment with an audible and visible bulge in his throat like a bullfrog being blown through a watermelon seed pipe.

"I'm Skullomania! This will be good sport! And also good exercise!" He bows respectfully and then, instead of waiting for the referee to begin the match, he begins to do pushups.

If you look away and back, he's doing pullups on an invisible and impossible midair suspended bar. He does a back flip off of it and begins squats, changing exercises everytime someone looks or looks away creating a montage like effect.

"The caber toss is a wonderful sport Ms. Nataya." He agrees finally as he resumes a standing position at the last second. "But even I know it's not why we're here TODAY!" There is a flash of light, and his fists push in to his sides just above his hips, while locking eye contact in with his opponent.

COMBATSYS: Skullomania has started a fight here.

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Skullomania      0/-------/-------|

COMBATSYS: Nataya has joined the fight here.

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Skullomania      0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0           Nataya

Nataya smiles. He may be weird, but at least he's nice about it, and not just completely deranged. She sets up her battle stance, balancing on the balls of her feet with her hands raised up in a classic kickboxer's pose.

What's not so classic about the pose is the fact that smoke seems to be pouring out of her sleeves, and the clouds glitter a bright silver, which catch the arificial mall lights nicely.

"The best of luck to you, Mr. Skullomania!" She calls from across the ring. However, she's closing the gap soon enough. The bell is run, and Nataya is already off like a shot, swooshing across the ground like a thing possessed, utterly without heed to her own personal safety. She uses her speed to grind a foot against the ground. The torque and friction allow her to swing one leg up on a neat snap kick to the chest as she tries to grind the heel of her show into Skullo's chest!

COMBATSYS: Nataya successfully hits Skullomania with Light Kick.

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Skullomania      0/-------/-----==|-------\-------\0           Nataya

Skullomania gasps, he falls backwards, a heel grinding painfully into his sternum. "Oh no! What will our hero DO!?" He demands loudly, with a heroic calm the belies the facade he attempts to wear. His red scarf flaps up across his face as he falls back, obscuring his face and also blinding him.

The costumed skeleton man begins to spin, however, immediately so that he is allready a human corkscrew when his shoulders hit the ground. The scarf orbits his spinning head, the black and white of his body becomes a mirky swirl, and then as if propelled by rockets he shoots forewards, his feet spinning up into the air to strike at Nataya's body, a trail of smoke and dust kicked up impossibly by his passage, no doubt some sort of chi manifestation.


COMBATSYS: Skullomania successfully hits Nataya with Skullo Slider.

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Skullomania      0/-------/-----==|==-----\-------\0           Nataya

The spinning Skullo smashes right into Nataya, knocking her back with significant force. The blow alone isn't enough to cause her too much consternation, but getting struck straight in retaliation isn't the best beginning for her! The feet knock her back sonsiderably, and she's left to consider her options as she stops to survey the area a moment.

The smoke obscures her movements a little, and she begins to move around the edge of the ring as if trying to get a bead on the tricky devil. A hand raises, and from the billowing smoke, three small lights appear, rising up and turning slowly as she tracks the skeletal warrior.

"Hup!" She calls as he flexes her hand, projecting the small prayer beads cloaked in some kind of power. Smoke trails after them as she projects the beads forward and they quickly grow in size. The silvery spheres grow to the size of softballs, twiple contrails of smoke trailing them as they seek out their target.

Should they hit, they'll explode in a concussive burst of force and smoke, blasting Skullo away and giving Nataya a little more space to operate in.

COMBATSYS: Nataya successfully hits Skullomania with Three Gems.

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Skullomania      0/-------/--=====|===----\-------\0           Nataya

Skullomania's costume eyes widen as the trio of projectiles blazes smokey trails towards him. He tries something he saw in the movies one time. You know this because he says, "I saw this in the movies once!" He dives forewards placing his hands above his head as he crashes suicidally for the malls tiled floor.

The handspring flip is executed beautifully, and it propels his body directly into the first gem! "OW!" He is sent into a lopsided and listing spin as a result, the second one smokes him in the leg and knocks him back to his feet. "Ayiyiyi!?"

Impressively he lands on his feet and begins to bounce back and forth, taking a few deep breaths to steady himself. This is an ill advised course of action as the third projectile then strikes him in the chest, blasting a ragged hole in his suit and showing moderate injury underneath.

He waggles a finger at Nataya and shakes his head in negation. "That was pretty crazy. Maybe a little TOO crazy!" He begins to glow with bright white energy, a few pennies that spilled from his pockets in his aerial maneuvering levitate centimeters above the tile.

COMBATSYS: Skullomania gathers his will.

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Skullomania      1/------=/=======|===----\-------\0           Nataya

Ah yes. The charging. Nataya's seen this before. It's a technique that some use to marshall their strength and use that power in battle soonthereafter. It's a fascinating power, and it's one she hopes to learn herself some day. For now, however, Nataya has just got to learn countermeasures.

For instance, she's pretty much come to the conclusion that the only way to deal with it given her arsenal of attacks... is to hit her opponent as hard as she can possibly muster while they're stuck in conentration.

The monk-girl swings her arms out, and a flickering hailstorm of tiny beads fill the air, twinkling like tiny stars as the clatter to the ground, the mists swarming about them as they shimmer and coalesce into small moving puddles. These puddles ooze at first, but then start to swim across the ground, moving like shimmering pools of mercury towards Skullomania and glowing with a bright sheen.

Should they strike the oddly clad man, they'll detonate in a pillar of energy and smoke, blasting the hapless Skullo around like a tennis ball in the US open. He'll beknocked about five times before being left to fall to the ground on his own.

COMBATSYS: Skullomania blocks Nataya's Five Precepts.

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Skullomania      1/----===/=======|===----\-------\0           Nataya

Skullomania braces for impact. He sees the blobs of stuff coming for him. He dislikes having things thrown at him. He has no use for it. "I Thought We Were Here For Neo League, Not Tables Ten-WhooooAOH!?" He begins to taunt, the first pillar easily knocking him into the air.

He bounces around several times, every rebound looking extremely painful. But as he begins to fall back down to earth, he curls into a tight ball and begins to spin rapidly. His speed increases rapidly until he's a whirling blurr. Skullomania streaks like an impossible comet towards Nataya, having bounces off the roof of the mall and shaken decades old dust from the light fixtures.

Suddenly he straightens out, his fist leading the way as he continues to make his devestating beeline for the woman he is fighting here today. The scarf trails behind him, flapping impressively as a result of the drag caused by his impressive speed. "NOW IT IS SKULLO TIME!"

COMBATSYS: Nataya dodges Skullomania's Skullo Punch EX.

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Skullomania      1/-----==/=======|===----\-------\0           Nataya


Skullo Time!
5rAnd that's exactly what Nataya does. Freezing like a deer in headlights as she gapes at the man's incredibly display of agility, it's all Nataya can do to keep her jaw from hitting the floor. It takes an awful lot to make her change her expression from the generally accepting smile, and Skull has managed to do it brilliantly. The only thing that would make it better is if he hit her with the attack.

Unfortunately, Skullomania falls a little short of what would have been a truly spectacular affair.
5rNataya lets out a squeak of surprise as she drops to the ground, not quite doing the splits as she covers her head with her arms. The breeze from the flying man blows her hair awry as she flops over, then rolls back up to see what exactly just happened. Holy smokes!

But no time to admire the speed. In an instant, she's retaliating. She raises up her arms, and the beads scattered on the ground raise up from the ground, swirling around in a tornado of clouds and shining lights. The beads glow with a fury as she whips them about in a dazzling light show. A spiral forms in front of her, and she projects the formation forward. Each little bead is charged with enough energy to begin blasting at Skullo with beams of pure energy force. The attacks are relentless, and Nataya tries to blast the man with enough of the beads before projecting them into him like a burst of shotgun pellets.

Skullomania is overwhelmed. There is just columns of energy everywhere and even his unpredictable style has difficulty at a range like this. He has only seconds to make some kind of decision. He throws his hands out at his sides, and looks around rapidly, trying to get a gauge on his options.

He cries out with joy as he spies a mobile sales hut a ways down the hallway, one that is selling novelty statuary at exhorbitant prices. He runs towards it, dangerous energies lapping at his heels! He dives forewards, and fumbles the statues sending them scattering everywhere. "Oh no!" He cries popping up from behind the counter, still facing his doom. He panics. He grabs the cash register, he yells something meaningless, but loud and throws it at the 'light' "SKULLO GOES NOT GENTLY INTO THE NIGHT!" He insists and then covers his eyes.

COMBATSYS: Skullomania fails to slow Ten Perfections EX from Nataya with Thrown Object.

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Skullomania      1/--=====/=======|=====--\-------\0           Nataya

The whole sales-stand and presumably skullomania gets wiped out by the force of the blast. Completing the above idea.

Nataya watches with considerable confusion as Skullomania's response to her assault is to huck a cash register at it. The cash register explodes in a spray of junk, coins, receipts and yen. She tosses up a hand to sheild herself from a few wayeard coins that bounce off her.

Her brow furrows as she steps forward to look for Skullomania, concern on her face. He's /weird/ but he's a nice sort of weird, which means that Nataya's not exactly excited about the prospect of having vaporized the man.

Footseteps announce her approach as she takes the moment to investigate the debris, looking for the man in the wierd suit as she waves away the smoke that isn't hers, coughing gently as she recovers some of her stamina.

"Mr. Skullomania? Are you alright? Where are you?"

COMBATSYS: Nataya gains composure.

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Skullomania      1/--=====/=======|====---\-------\0           Nataya

The little sales-hut is blown away in impossible winds and torrential waves of energy, bits of cheap plywood and stone and brass lions, gargoyles, lawn gnomes and other tacky nonsense goes sailing off down the halls beyond the areas cordoned off for the fight. This causes several shoppers to leap to attention and out of the way!

--Of Mr. Skullomania however there is no sign. But then, amidst the dust cloud where there once was a shopping kiosk, the black and white skeletal markings of Skullomania blur into action appearing as if from nowhere, the would-be superhero surges forewards, crossing the distance between them and into melee range amidst the good-for-tv destruction. "Haai yeaAAAAAAH!" He cries as he leaps forewards, lands in front of Nataya and then snaps one leg up high for the woman's chin, he leaps forewards into the blow adding a needless and flashy spin.

COMBATSYS: Nataya blocks Skullomania's Dangerous Heel.

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Skullomania      1/-======/=======|=====--\-------\0           Nataya

Well, it's certainly flashy! Nataya only has a moment to mount a proper defense, and the attack is deflected by a surprisingly thick cloud, several beads and an upraised arm all slowing the impact enough to keep her from crumpling under the sturdy assault. She's driven back considerably, taking a stumbling step as she breathes a sigh of releif. Skullomania is okay!
5RNow she doesn't feel so bad about hitting him more.

Such is the life of a fighter. The monk girl moves around, stepping deliberately on beads she's left on the ground. She begins to use them as friction reducing agents, allowing her skate acorss the linoleum floor of the mall. She sweeps about, trying to angle herself into one of Skullomania's blind spots. She flashes him a smile, and then is once again zipping in faster than should be allowable, her left elbow rocketingforward to crash into Skullo's face, followed by a sharp straight punch to the jaw.

COMBATSYS: Skullomania interrupts Strong Punch from Nataya with Skullo Dream.

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Skullomania      0/-------/-----==|=======\==-----\1           Nataya

Skullomania takes a brutal punch to the face, it takes his feet off of the ground and he spins several times before Natay can even follow up with her immediately following jab. Skullomania chuckles gleefully, getting excited, no doubt hysterical as a result of his near-death experience. His hands reach out and he makes eye contact with the woman as he gently folders her fist into both of his hands.

Impossible to fix and ultimately blamed on chi manipulation, the televised recording of the events are marred by static. And when it clears Natay and Skullo are drinking tea and seated on the edge of the fountain, dangling their feet into the water, swirling pennies around and talking to one another in a friendly fashion...

...But even before you can begin to follow the conversation, there is more static, and suddenly Skullomania is atop the sculpture in the middle of the fountain, holding Nataya by her feet and spinning precariously on his heels, whipping the woman about, centrifugal force no doubt forcing all the blood to her face. He releases her and she goes sailing for the nearest wall --

--Where another burst of static then sees Skullo impossibly waiting to catch her there, which he does, catching her and leaping into an aerial atomic piledriver that would make Zangief proud. After the two fo them collide with the tiles, shattering many of them into dust, Skullomania lays panting next to his opponent, obviously just as wiped from the effort as she must be from recieving it.

Nataya is really at a loss to explain precisely what just happened to her. What she recalls clearly is that she landed a punch on her opponent. The next thing sh eknew, she was being smashed into the ground like a tent peg with enough force to do some serious damage as Skullomania lands a solid blow, knocking her into near unconsciousness with the attack.

Falling over onto her side as she's released, she can barely think straight as her hands scrabble about the ground, trying to find purchase and bring herself back up to a standing position again. With considerable effort, she pushes herself up to her haunches. Her head's still spinning quite a bit and she nearly falls over when she tries to stand. Wrestlers and wrestling aren't styles she's used to. AS a result, she's always a little more disoriented after getting attacked by one.

"Nice hit!' She says loopily, leaning on one of the ropes as the silvery smoke goes from calm and flowing to practically boiling, beads swirling around as if chomping at the bit to attack Skullomania. And attack they do.

She raises a hand, and the beads form four spears, the glittering weapons first propping Nataya up before swirling around her like fan blades. The for quicksilver staffs then begin to rotate faster and faster before launching out of orbit, rocketing towards Skullomania. However, rather than skewer, they move horizontally, trying to smash into him like crossbars before beating down ont the masked marauder like so many police batons!

COMBATSYS: Nataya successfully hits Skullomania with Four Stages of Enlightenment.

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Skullomania      1/-------/=======|=------\-------\0           Nataya

Skullomania runs forewards, his scarf snaking out behind him as he does so, he tries to serpentine, to dodge the beads, but he cannot, they batter against him, slowing him down until eventually he is ground to a complete halt, still very far away from his opponent. He drops to one knee, coughs up a mouthful of blood. He puts a hand out signalling a stop and then completes the motion sprawling out on his face with a heavy wet thud.

COMBATSYS: Skullomania takes no action.

[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Nataya           0/-------/------=|

COMBATSYS: Skullomania can no longer fight.

[              \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Nataya           0/-------/------=|

The man is coughing up /blood/? That's not good at all!

Nataya is the first one to see what she can do, immediately followed a second later by paramedics. Even so, she's pretty much only got basic first aid down, and is soon crowded out by the medical technicians on site to attend to the man's injuries.

"Sorry!" is the best she can really come up with before they drag him off. She looks a little upset. Most people can at least stand up or at least sit up. Skullomania's reaction was certainly unexpected.

But there's not a whole lot she can do about that, now, except maybe write him a "Get Well Soon!" card, which she most certainly will as she's pushed back to her own corner and away from her now-unconsciois opponent.

Such a strange, strange man.

COMBATSYS: Nataya has ended the fight here.

Skullomania gets back up after a few minutes. He wipes his mouth on his arm, sleeve and glove coming with it of course. He turns to Nataya, and bows respectfully, and then leaps and bounds like a lunatic over to the fountain where there is still a steaming kettle of tea. He refills his cup, assumes the lotus position on the edge of the pool and begins to drink it calmly. Maybe not such a down note ending, but there's still not a lot left to see here. There is a burst of static on the recording of the fight and then Skullomania is gone.

Log created on 23:18:35 09/10/2008 by Skullomania, and last modified on 14:23:22 09/11/2008.