Neo League 0001 - NL#00026: Gertrude vs May

Description: Gertrude returns for another Neo-League match to face off against the mysterious newcomer May! An aptly location is picked for the battle, as the beach provides just the right venue for the pirate girl to make her grand entrance. Although Gertrude seems to think that the jury is still out on whether or not May is a legitimate pirate, the battle between raw power and raw skill proves to be quite entertaining nonetheless. <Winner: Gertrude>

"Are you... are you sure you're ready to fight again, Ms. Verhangnis?"

The question is innocent enough, and yet it provokes a sharp look from Gertrude that gets the helpful member of Neo League staff to back off right away. Gertrude's expression is not a happy one, but she's managed to leave the hospital, and really, aside from a tender spot on her head - still bandaged after the impromptu exit through a wall - she's fine. Her pride may take longer to heal.

The beach, though, is cold, and largely empty. The sea whipped into a mad frenzy of foam behind her, and the sand wet, cloying ... really just quite unpleasant. It matches her mood quite well, really!

Nobody knows who the heck May is, and Gertrude's own recent performances haven't been show stoppers, so it is only dedicated blood sport fans who have come to watch the battle. As Gertrude waves off the assistant and moves to take up a more meditative stance, though, she makes a visible effort to calm herself down. Fighting with her head in a bad space is only going to end with more lumps and more bad feeling.

"Its fine. I've fought a hundred battles. Just because there are cameras, now, that doesn't change anything at all. Just because people are watching."

She exhales, and utters the words which will no doubt doom her in the next few moments:

"After Gods and Demons, I'm sure there'll be no more surprises here."

No Gods or Demons this time.

Just Pirates!!

The beach scenery is aptly for Gertude's contender today as it may soon become very evident, and it might also shed some light on why absolutely no one seems to know just who this person named May is.

Off in the distance an honest to goodness small fishing boat with a sail approaches at remarkably speed towards the shore. There's a small person standing with a rather defiant pose by the starport and though she can't be seen very well, her voice.. let's just say it can be heard.

"Yo ho! Fiddle dee di!! A pirate's life fer me!!"

Despite its speed, it would still take some time for the boat to come anywhere near to shore, but that doesn't seem to matter for the navigator. Whoever is in the small fishing boat makes a giant leap clearing quite a distance and lands with a loud crash into the sandy beach, picking up dust after her collision that passes off as a landing.

As the dust settles, the figure is reveled. A small girl no taller than five feet, garbed in a loose orange shirt and suspenders.. and a massive pirate hat with the Jolly Roger symbol. She also seems to be hauling an anchor that is nearly as tall as she is.

"Ahoy me hearties!!" The girl beams happily and skips closer to the arena. "Captain May at yer service! I'm looking for a lass named Gertrude! I'm supposed to be plundering her booty today! Har har har!!"


And they say Gertrude's heart shrank five sizes that day.

The tall blonde stares at May, and the huge anchor she is lugging around. There's still some mad hope in her heart that it might be a prop of some sort - made of foam, maybe, or latex. They can do wonderful things with latex, or so she's led to believe.

But in her heart, she knows it isn't true. That is an anchor. Used to stop tons of metal moving. And the tiny little girl is waving it around like it is a baton.

There's a small, strangled sob.

And then Gertrude seems to rally. Raising her arms, and sweeping her feet into a wide, braced stance. "That'd be me." She says, adjusting her glasses and taking a few long, slow breaths.

"I'm not, the one who is going to be plundered, here. I'll ... sink, your ship? You... scurvy, dog?"

May leans her face back after Getrude's feeble attempt to imitate a pirate. She's smiling though, being clearly amused by at least someone with enough decency to call her a proper pirate insult. It's better than how most adults that face her in battle tend to react.

"Arr har har har!!" She throws her head back in laughter, her young girlish voice making a very disturbing contrast to all her tough pirate lingo. "We'll see about that, ye bilge rat!" May waves her massive anchor at her opponent before letting rest on the sand making a small tremor. Sure enough that's the real thing she's carrying.

She grabs sand from the beach to dust her hands for a better grip and then heaves her massive improvised weapon over her shoulder. "Just try and blow me down! I'll smash ye to chum buckets!"

COMBATSYS: May has started a fight here.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
May              0/-------/-------|

COMBATSYS: Gertrude has joined the fight here.

[\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////////////]
Gertrude         0/-------/-------|-------\-------\0              May

Gertrude doesn't know what is scarier, really. The fact that May is waving around a massive hunk of steel with no visible effort, or the fact that she's clearly absolutely insane. Her lips quiver at the unfairness of it all... and then press together into a thin, determined line. Alrighty. She's going to have to do this. She came here. The weather is terrible, and May is... is some sort of disturbed kid who watches too many Johnny Depp movies.

"Just... just so long as you don't steal my lucky charms?"

Wait, that's leprechauns, not pirates. And Gertrude is neither irish, nor particularly small. Oh well. Lets move on quickly.

Leaping into the air, Gertrude's hand comes swinging around in a heavy descending chop - aiming to smash right into the top of the hat and, hopefully, the skull that lays beneath. She doesn't know what tricks this girl has in store - beyond the obvious hunk of metal - but, she doesn't LOOK very tough, she looks kind of small, actually, so... maybe she can take an early lead?


COMBATSYS: Gertrude successfully hits May with Utopian Crusher.

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Gertrude         0/-------/------=|=====--\-------\0              May

" wot, mate??" Gertrude's peculiar choice of words may be giving her an early lead here as May blinks in confusion at the threat(?) clearly not understanding it. Is she confusing her with a leprechaun or something? "Nay, matie! I be a pirate, not a--"


And that's when she gets chopped right on the head causing her hat to crumble under the weight and cover her eyes. "Oi!! Aggh!! Me hat!!" She wails and swings her anchor blindly taking a few steps back until she manages to pry her own hat off her face with a *pop!*.

"Now you've done it! Eat this!!" May could have a few more tricks up her sleeve as she swings her anchor up in the air and a puddle of water forms right beneath Gertrude feet. As it bubbles a large sized dolphin entirely made of chi erupts from the water aiming to headbutt her right in the face.

COMBATSYS: Gertrude blocks May's Applause for the Victim.

[   \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////        ]
Gertrude         0/-------/----===|=====--\-------\0              May

Gertrude's growing horror at the situation she's found herself in only grows when she is assailed by a... a dolphin. The burst of energy doesn't LOOK like energy at first and, in a testament to Gertrude's love for all animals, her first instinct is to PUNCH the dolphin right in its cheerful snout. The result is that she is knocked backwards several paces, and the watery energy is splashed all about her, leaving Gertrude confused and flustered.

Because until that moment, she had a clear and calm understanding of the battle she was engaged in.

"What the hell was that?!"

Spluttering, Gertrude shakes her head, and slams her foot into the ground. 'Enough is enough!' Her stance seems to say. 'You don't get to throw dolphins at me without an explanation!'

From behind her thick-rimmed glasses, Gertrude observes May with a growing suspicion. "Is this some sort of joke?" She demands, "What kind of person are you?! Where did you learn to summon creatures like that?!"

COMBATSYS: Gertrude calculates her next move.

[   \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////////////////////        ]
Gertrude         0/-------/----===|=====--\-------\0              May

"This is no joke, matie!!"

May's expression is positively beaming with fierce delight. The look of a precocious urchin of a girl who just got told she could smash all the dishes in the kitchen without repercussions.

"I be a pirate and that's all a lubber like you needs to know!!"

This little girl seems awfully eager to get to use that massive anchor of her and offers no more explanation to her abilities than that. She raises her massive weapon over her head and charges head long towards her opponent with that devilish grin still plastered on her face.


Her rather dubious warcry given, she reaches where Gertrude is and swings her anchor right at the top of her skull with clear intentions to bash Gertrude's head in.

COMBATSYS: Gertrude interrupts May Dynamic from May with Rising Knuckle.

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Gertrude         0/-------/---====|=======\======-\1              May

There are some advantages to obsessive training. For instance, when a berserk little girl wielding a massive lump of metal comes charging at you, the usual array of options are as follows:

Dodge - Well that doesn't seem very likely, she is charging at you in a berserk rage, possibly due to damage to a hat and/or punching of dolphins.

Block - Again, this doesn't seem very likely to help, it is a huge lump of metal careening towards your delicate, recently-injured cranium. Also, your hands are numb, because you just punched a dolphin.

Take it like a MAN and try to hit back - again, no, this isn't going to help. If you stand there and take it, your delicate skull will be crushed like an egg.

Gertrude though, has a fourth option: Punch. PUUUUNCH.

May's anchor comes in for her, and she twists. The impact with her shoulder is still heavy enough to make her sink to her knee with a grunt, but then, she rises. Her knuckles lead the way, and she hammers them home into May's jaw, twisting upwards as she straightens and puts her full wait into the...


That attack name shouted from behind gritted teeth, and when its done, Gertrude works her brusied shoulder backwards. She really feels like she ought to try and keep up the banter, ,though.

"N-Neither of us are even fencers!!!"

"GGRRAAAAAAAAH!!" May's chin takes the brunt of the attack and to give her some credit, she clenches her jaw and screams out in pain like a real pirate instead of a little girl.

She's still sent flying backwards though, making a few back flips in the air before unceremoniously flopping face first on the sand with a loud flop. Surprisingly, even after taking that massive blow, she's still holding on to her anchor.

She stirs from the sands shortly after, leaning on her weapon to help her stand up and wobbles. Her face is down, with her comically large pirate hat covering most of her face. It may look.. like she's about to cry.

But real pirates don't cry! They just keep attacking!

May raises her face again with a look of burning hatred and just... charges again!!??


It may become clearly evident by now that despite May's massive strength she's never been taught how to fight properly.

Next verse same as the first. May raises her massive anchor with one hand and starts wailing on Gertrude, her other hand is balled up into a fist which she also uses to pound on her opponent wherever it may land.

"I'll send ye to Davy Jones' locker!!"

COMBATSYS: Gertrude blocks May's Ultimate Whiner EX.

[       \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  /////////////                 ]
Gertrude         0/-------/-======|====---\-------\0              May

May comes at Gertrude like a little girl possessed. This time, trying to interrupt it with her fist seems like a death sentence. It is really only the fact that May hasn't been taught properly which gives Gertrude any hope at all. She has to wheel backwards in the sand, using the flat of her palm to hit the side of the hefty anchor and knock it off course - whilst her other hand fends away May's fist.

It is, in some ways, a beautiful display to watch. Raw talent and power from May, being fended off by Gertrude - who has the exact opposite. Nowhere near the same amount of innate strength and guts, but extraordinarily good technique, enough to give her the edge, for now, over unfocused power. She can only really hope she keeps it up!

When, at last, the assault has slowed, that is when the tall blonde switches tact. "Y-you've got a lot of strength." She says, and as she does, she steps forwards, numb arm raised up high.

"But Pirate's gold is no treasure at all..."

WHAM! She brings the hand down in a stern chop, hoping to hit firmly into the top of May's anchor-wielding shoulder.

"Compared to the treasure of HARD-WORK and STUDYING!"

D-Did I seriously just say that?

COMBATSYS: Gertrude successfully hits May with Sublime Comet EX.
- Power hit! -

[       \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////                        ]
Gertrude         1/-------/=======|=======\===----\1              May

May continues her furiously relentless attack until she can swing her anchor no more. At some point after seeing all her wheeling strikes parried or brushed out of the way, the little pirate girl realizes the futility of her actions and backs out wheezing for air. She may be quite strong but she doesn't have the energy to fuel it and being very very young is probably not helping any.

But just as before, its Gertrude's words that hurt the girl far more than any blow could ever do. The chop comes right for her shoulder blade and the girl winces crashing into the sand, just to pick herself up again covered in dust, sweat, and an ample amount of blood in her mouth.

"NEVAAAAARRR!!" She screams as only a little girl that is being told she can't play being a pirate anymore can and raises her anchor up in the air.

"I WILL NEVER BE A LAND LUBBER!!!!!" May's yells to the heavens and from behind her massive chi gathers, forming not a dolphin but a GIANT WHALE this time. Pointing at Gertrude with the tip of her anchor, May orders the chi made creature to leap over the pirate's head and crash head first into the glasses wearing woman.


COMBATSYS: May successfully hits Gertrude with Great Yamada Attack EX.

[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  //////                        ]
Gertrude         1/-======/=======|====---\-------\0              May

Gertrude's expression as the whale comes into existence is quite comical. Really, the only thing she can do is try to brace herself for the inevitable. When the inevitable happens, and she is smashed by the giant creature, she is driven bodily into the ground. When she manages to pick herself up from the sand, it is with a three foot deep, Gertrude-shaped imprint left in her wake.

And a mouthful of watery energy, which she spits out.

"A-alright then." She says, adjusting her glasses carefully, and taking a deep breath. "If you want to be a pirate..."

Running forwards, Getrude does her best to stay steady. Really, it is tough, but her determination not to lose again drives her forwards. A soft blue glow begins to surround her, and she exhales deeply as she dashes across the sand, leaving a streaking blue afterimage in her wake.

Her aim is simple. She tries to grab May by the shoulders and, if successful, she'll simply swing her up and around - even that massive anchor of hers! - trailing blue afterimages all the way. Then she'll roll back, and PITCH May towards the Gertrude-shaped hole in the ground. Because from a distance, it KIND of looks like an X shape, and that's where you bury things with pirates, right?

"T-Take a nap before your timbers are shivered, Captain!!"

COMBATSYS: May blocks Gertrude's EX Tomoe Nagi.

[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  < >  ///                           ]
Gertrude         0/-------/--=====|=======\-------\1              May

May is a vicious little urchin for a little girl. When Gertrude manages to bounce back from her muddy nap, May scowls through bloody teeth up at the adult daring to grab her by the shoulders and struggles to resist the throw. Gertrude succeeds in flinging her, not in small part due to her small body, but with the anchor taken into account May manages to bash the hook portion of the improvised weapon into the sand and prevent herself from being thrown too far.

The little girl continues to clench her teeth fiercely, eyes full of great indignation, and taking a deep breath she advances at Gertrude /yet again/ with her anchor raised high up over her head.

"I'll shiver... your.. timbers!!" May manages to say through great exhaustion and suddenly starts spinning on her heels, anchor held out with both hands becoming a whirlwind of metal. Although sadly not the rock kind.

Spinning seemingly out of control until she's little more than a vortex of air, May spins directly towards Gertrude to swing that anchor of hers into her ribs as hard as she possibly can.

COMBATSYS: May can no longer fight.

[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Gertrude         0/-------/--=====|

COMBATSYS: Gertrude dodges May's Super Screaming Ultimate Spinning Whirlwind.

[                 \\\\\\\\\\\\\  <
Gertrude         0/-------/--=====|

When in doubt, jump.

To say that Gertrude is in doubt would be an understatement. She's spent this entire FIGHT in doubt. Doubt has become her best friend, her neighborhood, her state of mind. She's moved into Doubt and set up a nice little two up two down with a white picket fence. She's subscribed to the Doubt Times, and is in the running for Mayor!

So she jumps, and by some miracle, May passes underneath her. Gertrude lands heavily on the other side of the girl, and turns, fully expecting to have to keep defending herself because - as impossible as she would have liked to believe it may be - she just, doubts, that May is going to stay down if there's still an ounce of strength in her body.

But this time, it seems like May really is done.

Although Gertrude still counts to ten to be absolutely certain. And then eleven, to be sure.

Finally, she exhales, and relaxes, shaking her head in disbelief. "That child." She says, slowly, "Is going to be the death of us all one fine day."

And with that prophecy given, she wobbles her way back towards Metro. She needs a drink. Maybe rum.

Sure enough, as May's whirlwind attacks come to a slow end, the girl can be seen staggering out sideways, then the other way, until she finally flops face first on the sand.

She twitches there and moves no longer, only muttering something softly. "A pirate's... life.. for me.."

COMBATSYS: Gertrude has ended the fight here.

Log created on 15:23:12 12/15/2014 by May, and last modified on 20:45:35 12/15/2014.